ET: Member blog

[Ishje]'s diary

566438 Link to this entry
Written about Sunday 2005-05-01
Written: (7145 days ago)

verhaaltje over marishka..

I did not know what happend to me,
but suddenly I hated him.
The way he lay down on the bed.
The way he looked at me with his dirty look.
The way he treated me.
I saw his shadow reflecting in the window,
the only thing I wanted was to hurt him
in every way I could.
I turned away from the window
and looked into his face,
he still had that arrogant look
I walked towards him, and moved close to his ear.
"You are lucky that you're still alive" I whispered.
He started laughing in my face
and I felt the hate in my heart when he did that.
I grabbed him by his sweater and pulled him off the bed.
He stopped laughing as fast as he started.
He did not seem to understand that I was so strong.
"Damn you", I said, not whispering anymore "this is your last night at this earth.
I saw the fear in his eyes, he was scared and I was feeling satisfied with that.
"You fear me too late" I shouted at him.
He started to talk in a funny language I did not understand, he could not get the words over his lips.
I throwed him true the room, where he fell down at the other side, close to the door.
He stood op quickly, but I was there faster, "You want to get out?" I asked him.
And before he could awnser I slammed him through the wooden door, right into the hall.
He did not wake up, I picked him up from the floor and started to lick some blood from a wound at his head.
I kept on drinking, he was still breathing.
I stopped drinking before his heart stopped beating
and I threw him back in the room.
The door was broken, so everybody could look inside.
I had drank just a little bit of his blood, he died because of the slam true the door. I decided to look like he was robbed so I took his money, made a bigger mess of the room that it already was.
Then I left...I saw him in the newspaper the next day.
The police thought it was a gang that killed him.
They thought it had something to do with drugsgangs.
I knew they did not know of me.

564795 Link to this entry
Written about Friday 2005-04-29
Written: (7147 days ago)

angel of heaven...angel of hell

her white wings
her blonde hair
in a ray of light she came
her dress wispering softly in the wind
evrything turned into silver glass
the beauty within
her blue eye's waching you
she came to get you
she came to bring you to heaven
do you feel it?
green woods
beautiful gardens
this is where you belong

her black wings
her black hair
in the darkness she came
red fire all around you
silence....dead silence
her dress black like the night
she looks at you with her red eyes
she came to bring you to hell
do you feel it?
the burning flames
you see the other creatures suffer
you see the pain in their eyes
this is where you belong

531974 Link to this entry
Written about Friday 2005-03-25
Written: (7182 days ago)

ik ben lief
omdat ik wil dat
anderen lief voor mij zijn

ik ben er
omdat ik wil dat
anderen er voor mij zijn

ik heb liefde
omdat ik wil dat
ik liefde terug krijg

531802 Link to this entry
Written about Friday 2005-03-25
Written: (7182 days ago)

(ehm...vraag maar niet waar dit op slaat want ik weet het zelf ook niet, slim he? )

voel je je alleen?
kom maar bij mij..ik zorg ervoor dat je niet meer alleen bent.
wees niet zo verdrietig. het komt wel goed.
kom maar bij me zitten, ik zal je vasthouden.
ik zal je troosten, ik zal je liefkozen.
nee ik laat je niet alleen,ik ga niet weg.
ik zal je beschermen, ik zal je helpen.
je bent wel lief, wees eens zeker van jezelf.
kom erachter wat je wilt. doe iets met je leven.
sta op, blijf niet liggen,kijk eens in de spiegel.
zie je het? kijk eens goed.
je bent het wel waard, je moet willen.
kom op, blijf niet zo hangen in jezelf.
recht je schouders, goed zo.
wees trots op wat je bent.
ja ik ben er nog, ik zei toch dat ik niet wegging?
kom maar weer bij mij, ik zal je een knuffel geven.

531767 Link to this entry
Written about Friday 2005-03-25
Written: (7182 days ago)

whoe

526787 Link to this entry
Written about Saturday 2005-03-19
Written: (7188 days ago)

About a girl

The tears run down her face
Her finger nails put deep into her skin.
The black make up on her hands

She walks into the black room,
and falls down on the ground.
She tries to remove her thoughts

It will not help it will not happen
she falls deeper and deeper into her own mind
Into her own body

She makes wishes
Wishes for live, wishes for dead
She cant understand why she is so sad

She saw herself changing
and realizes how life sucks
The fact is: she doesnt recognize herself anymore

When she takes a look in the mirror of her mind
and see what she became
How her live is messed up because of her.

She forgot how she once used to be
She forgot how she loved life
All the time she thinks life sucks

She forgot the good time's
and rememberd the bad time's
Which keep on happening in her head over and over

She wants to get out of her own cage,
but she lost the key on her way
Tears running down her face............she forgot

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