OK my friend Ashly is trying to make me choose between her and JD. And I'm going to choose JD b/c what Ashly is doing it total bullshit in my option. But i don't know if I'm doing the right thing. Because she is like my sister and her mom has pretty m,uch adopted me as her daughter. I call her mommy and spend most weekends there and every thing. She talks to me and trys to take care of me when i need and she would even take money from my real dad, that i liive with, for the all the food i have ate while at her house and Ashly said that if i choose him she doesn't want me to talk to her mother or consider her mother like a mom to me anymore. And she would tell her mom all the bad things about me and make her hate me. Massage me if you have any option on the subject.

Things are so hard now a days. I miss how things were when I was a little girl. Simple and easy. Keep my room clean and listen to Nana and Papa and everything would be alright. No worries or cares in the world. Now I to keep my room clean, listen to Dad, go to high school, study for test, listen to teachers, deal with friends, deal with people who don't like me and mess with me because of it, deal with being in love with some one who i shouldn't love because the are with someone who is close to me as a friend. Sometimes i wish the world would just dissappear. Not forever but just for a little while, just so things could be peaceful and everyone could rest. The world is becomeing such a terrible place to live. That some, like me, would rather just not live at all.I'm on freaking Paxil(anti-depesent) and seeing a therypist and I'm only 15. To most I'm still at an age where I'm still a child. I'm not suppose to have to worry about all this crap. But I do and things are just getting worse and worse day by day and I just wish it would all stop. For one min.,one hour, one day, one week, one month, one year. Truthfully I would be thank for for one second of true peace. How much longer am I going to be able to take all this. I don't know. But I"m going to try my hardest because i don't want to hurt the ones i love and hold dear to me. I don't want to hurt the few people that actuly care about me.

Love,
    TinkerBell