This is my last attempt to make sense,
cause this life i live makes everything and everyone dense.
My life has no more juice to live,
and i have no more blood to give.
I have nothing left worth living for,
so i'll take my soul and walk out life's door.
I expected nothing for no one and i ask nothing of no one,
but in my life i have nothing to show for what i've done.
The alchol and drugs consume me inside,
cause within my world is the only place i can confide.
My tears have turn to dark red blood,
and my life is being taking over by love's greatest flood.

Ok this journal entry will go to the women who think all guys are the same without knowing why. Just because men are men dosen't mean all men are the same, some of them have pure hearts and are very sensitive to what is said to them like me! Women if you don't like the guy that's trying to get with just tell them cause if they happen to be like me and very sensitive they would rather you tell them in the begining so that way it don't hurt as much. All my relationships have been nothing but heart breakers...cause none of them would actually tell the truth...and all it did was hurt 10 times as more....I hate the fact women look at all men the same just low down dirty dogs, but one day when women want to find the special love where men actually care...there want be any around cause you women who treat men like all others.....their will be no more men who actually have a heart cause you women take their heart away like mine!! But hopefully one day you will see cause i'm never wrong!

If only she knew how much i loved her she would understand, but the more i try she keeps pushing me away and away.....why is it that it always has to end like this cause the more i sit here and think about it, the more i start to wonder why i didn't give up on love after the first true love.

Women
That's a subject only god can master....but i'm going to try my best to give youa lesson from it! Women want to be treated as if they are the only one you can turn when they need a friend. They want to be held, they want to be kissed, and they want to feel loved to the extent to where only you and her exsist. Treat her as if she was the only women you can love, and the only person you can come to when you feel left out! Women can be your best friends, or your worst enemy...but the only reason they become your worst enemy is if your too scared to admit being in love or a sexret crush. There is no reason to treat a women like dirt, God put them on this earth as a gift from him...cause without them we would become incomplete, and it's the same for you women god put us guys here to complete your lives as well! I know at times you feel as if guys just don't know when to quit...but your somebody is out there, it make take a while for him to arrive but the perfect guy is out there for you...just give it time, and you will find him eventually! I've tired for so many years to figure out women, after being hurt by so many...but i was always cheated on....but nowi have a Girlfriend who loves me as me.....It took me pain after pain to understand, that when you feel as if no one cares somebody is out there wating for your arrival, and same to you ladies. Men treat your women as if you wanted to be treated and i guarentee that you will be happy with your choice cause you will be so in love....that no one will stand in your way of happiness..So this article are for the men who think they can treat women like dirt and also for the men who don't think no one is out there for him....and this is also for the women who want to feel love in some way instead of being backstab from men's stupid hormones!!

Thank you,
Dr.Tony

Part I my life's story to hell!


Do you remember our first kiss? From the world coming to a complete stop and our surroundings just comint to a point in time that was so..perfect. I remember the feeling of your soft lips coming in contact with my own, and having the feeling as if i was finally complete. Do you recall the first time we made love? I rememberjust like it was yesterday...That day you came to spend the day with me and we sat and watched CMT singing the songs we knew, but then a song came on and I started to cry. The song was I believe by Diamond Rio. As teh song continued to play i was on the other side of the room still crying and you came over and held me, and told me that it was ok, and to tell me you loved me. We decided to be alone so I lied to my mom saying we were going for a walk, but instead we sneaked behing my house to the little house. When we reached the house i locked the door and closed the blinds. I held you in my arms kissing you on your neck kissing your sweet lips, and thanking god in my mind for having someone to love. We removed each others clothing, but slowly admiring everything on our bodies. I laid you down on the floor continuing to admire everything that you had kissing and touching while you were saying "i love you".

People are so arrogant...ok lets look at this situation. Two best friends known each other since kindergarten basically called each other brother for their whole entire lives! Well one day joe gets a girlfriend and he falls in love with her, and then she takes his heart and burns it to peices..well time goes on he leaves for basic training and tony is still left behind trying to figure out what he's gonna do with his life, and one day out of the blue he gets accepted to college! Wow thats a shock! Anyway in the time joe is gone his ex-gf blames tony for their break up and tries to turn his family against him by telling his nephews that he will stab them in the back if their not careful. What the fuck!!! Ok if you any family member would you do that? I mean honestly would you ever turn your back on family? Well as time goes on tony is left with a situation having someone kick her ass or just letting it go...now here's a lesson everyone need to know just because someone tries to sabbatoge your life dosen't mean you need to get so angry about it just let it go cause no matter what family will never go against you in no matter how you try don't ever turn your back on them. And if your one of those ex-gf you need to grow up cause if you don't your really gonna fuck up your whole enitre life!

by:words of wisdow Tony

I've come to notice that.....people try to hard to find something that dosen't even exsist in real attribute to society today. We strive everday to persue something that everyone knows is not and will not be reachable to mankind. The real question you ask me is why? Why is a word that has less meaning... please come up with a diffrent one such as; for whom, or does it dwell within my soul? These quotes have meaning! None such as why....your question will not be answered if you start off with why because then you will exceed your brainless mind to fufill something that no one knows or even cares for. You could ask my why i'm writing this or you can become more civil and ask me for whom I am writing this for! Now the plot thickens....I write for the intense feeling people get when they read something that is actually true, and not lies which spread through our human exsistence. We wake up everday with the same thought in our head is what we read true? Does it come from something that actually exsist? Or do we live in a soceity full of belifs and dreams? We read things in books, magazines, and even the good old Bible..but everyday it's being proven that our society dwells on the fact that false tense is a meaning of our everday lives. Let's take love as an example...what is it? We read the diffrent way to find it, but is it true? The answer is no... you make your own path to suceed love, there is no such thing as help to suceed you path, because you are the only one that can weild your path to find something such as love. I have found no need for love, in my life the word does not exsist! I used to believe in love until I found out it was my way out to find something more....Myself! Before you can acheive true love you must find yourself first, only then we anyone ever be in love with you! Everyone makes mistakes, and all of your mistakes can be forgiven if you find your true self. There is no meaning in trying to hurt someone's inner feeling to complete yours when inside you really don't even have one! My analysis is find out for whom you are here for in this Sorrowful place we call earth, and then you will find your greatest accomplishment within you!