I've decided to see the school Psychiatrist. Yeah it's free and stuff but supposidly help me out of the extreme depression I have been in for the last 3 years. Don't know why it took me soo long to get to this point in deciding this but guess what I am going to see them tomorrow so maybe it will help, or maybe not. I don't really know, I just need someone in person that can help me from drowning. Someone that is here and now and can look at my problems objectively. Instead of as a friend or as a family member. I need a "Lisenced professional" I guess. I always thought that these kind of people were for serial killers and stuff.

Ok so its the day before christmas and I'm setting things up and actually in a good mood right. Ya know that festive spirit. Then In the midst of it all I learn that my great grandmother died. My great grandfather died awhile ago and she followed abviously. SO I will go to a funeral and I don't know when I will be back. God I am going to miss her.

Well happy thanksgiving to me \. DOnt worry Ross as you sit all alone at home on Thanksgiving, they didn't mean to leave you and not tell you where they were going..... Be thankful for your health that is going down the drain, your life that has turned complicated, and the family that is gone and having fun at Disney without you. Cheers!!!

*cyring alone*

Don't EVER leave the one you love for the one you like because the one you like will leave you for the one they love...