~The Silence Of Your Memory~

A kinda word, A gentle toutch
Is all I ever needed
Now in the silence of
Your memory Im seated

I sit here today and still I miss
The presence of you near
For in you leaving was brought to life
All of my worst fears

And daily now they haunt me
Never letting me forget
Now here alone in the silence
Of your memory I sit

Wispered 'I love yous'
From your dark siluette
Now haunt my never changing dream
Of words I cant forget

~Alisha Heckelbeck~
Note: Please do not copy or remove poem from this page. ©

~Love And Friendship~

Can friendship hold on
When your love is denied
If I cannot give
What you want deep inside

For all ive done wrong
And all ive done righ
Where does the truth lie
Is it out of my sight

Without your friendship
Can I hold on to it all 
Without you there
How far will I fall

My nourthern star
My guiding light
Where would I turn
In my darkest night

Will I hold regret
When It goes awry
Will I find myself
Always wondering why

Timming is a plague
For never is it right
With fear and uncertainty
Ill prepare my heart tonight

~Alisha Heckelbeck~
Note: Please do not copy or remove poem from this page. ©

~A soldiers love~

laying here awake from troubled dreams
Far away my soldier sleeps
Many tears shed pleading with god above
Sitting here waiting on a soldiers love

A quick goodbye never seems enough
But its all you really have when times get tough
Plans made for the future with hopes and dreams
But its really all chance
Or so it seems

You plan for the best
But also the worst
Though its hard
Resposebility comes first

~Alisha Heckelbeck~
Note: Please do not copy or remove poem from this page. ©

~A Soldier Never Cries~

Placing me on his knee he said
A soldier never cries
And with his camo shirt sleve
He dried my weeping eyes

Im not a soldier Daddy
I sadly said to him
Yes you are he explained to me
As tears filled my eyes again

You are MY little soldier
So chin up and dont cry
Put a smile on that face
Dont let them see inside

Dont ever let them know theyve won
Then for sure the war is done
Stand your ground and dont give in
Then in the end youll surley win

I smiled and the tears were gone
I knew for sure they all were wrong
Id stand my ground and continue figthing
A soldier has no time for crying

~Alisha Heckelbeck~
Note: Please do not copy or remove poem from this page. ©

~Forever Friend~

Please will you be my forever friend
whos there when all else fails
When lifes frantic chages come around
Thoughout these endless days

Will you be there in my lowest times
to laugh away my fears
When life makes no since at all
And I cant see through the tears

Will you be there to tell me how stupid I am
When Im making a mistake
Then hold back all 'I told you sos'
And buy me a feel better cake

Will you be there through the good and bad
Catching me when I fall
When it seems things could only get worse
Will you be there through it all

Will you be there to hold me hand
Right beside me in the rain
As I gather my scattered thoughts
Caring not if we look insane

Will you be there to while away my tears
When the world lets me down again
Picking me up and pushing me on
Not letting me call it the end

Will you be there to laugh
When I fall down
then lending a helpful hand
Then fall down yourself
Cause your laughing to hard to stand

If you can promise me these things
Ill promise to you now
I will be YOUR forver friend
Consider this my vow

And like you will be there for me
Ill always be there for you
Through ever little dramatic moment
To my greatest friend I will be true

~Alisha Heckelbeck~
Note: Please do not copy or remove poem from this page. ©

~Your sin, My mistake~

In my mind a bitter story plays out
A untold enormity now spoken out loud

My mind cannot comprihend your baleful act
With every word you eradicate my existance

Though atrocious was your act
I still find myself enthralled

Though the foreshadow of our future dulls
your winsome spirit still fasinates me

Vulger was the deed now done
Forbidding the results

I falter from excrutiating pain
But inscribed in my heart you still remain

~Alisha Heckelbeck~
Note: Please do not copy or remove poem from this page. ©

~Memories Of The Fall~

To my sisters, Nilda and Victoria. This is about the last fall we spent on Autumn RD, When Victoria was just learing to walk. And how we spent all our time at Autumn Spring. (Which we discovered together and Named.) I miss you and love you VERY much!


~"Memories Of The Fall"~

The leaves falling all around
in the cool October air.
The colors of that Autumn,
All so bright and fair.

Memories of a little one,
Playing in raked up piles.
A ocean of dying leaves,
Goes on and on for miles.

A quiet little spring,
Where sisters love to play.
A perfect place to read and wright,
Where the deer so ofter lay.

Memories of that Autumn,
I'll always hold so dear.
Homesick for that place,
I boldly shed a tear.

Though so long ago,
These precious memories in my heart.
I'll hold them close and cherish them,
From my mind they will never depart.

~Alisha Heckelbeck~

~Realities seam~

Goodnight, sleep tight, In peaceful dreams. Close your eyes and let go of realities seams

Do not be afraid of the darkness around you. For in your dreams a brighter place surrounds you.

A place where rainbows paint the sky. A place where fantasy meets the eye.

Upon the cotton candy clouds you dance, while far below you watch the unicorn prance.

Your imagination soars on butterfly wings, in a place full of many mistical things.

And as the day ends the world is still light, you will never again be afraid of the night.

So lose yourself in peaceful dreams, close your eyes and let go of realities seams.
~For Nick~ Never be afraid to dream!

~Insanity Of A Fantasy~

I dream of a romance
on far away shores
where the majestic night
carries on the lores
of a time and place
found only in dreams
tearing away at realities seams

A place so alluring
My mind escapes me
And for a moment in time
My imagination frees me
And im set ablaze
By the illusion so grand
In a unparalleled reality I stand

Forgetting the insanity of my dream
I am now lost forever in this sight i've seen
Inside this reality of my mind
In this fantasy I now walk blind

~Alisha Heckelbeck~
Note: Please do not copy or remove poem from this page. ©

~REALM OF INSANITY~

I step out of reality
Into the great unknown
In the darkness of insanity
Somewhere I often roam

The plauges that often haunt me
Now so far from gone
And all that is before me
Is this endless silent song

In this void of solitude
I breath the poisoned scent
Of the nothingness around me
And for now I am content

For all is gone but nothing
And all here still the same
In this realm of insanity
I think I shall remain

~Alisha Heckelbeck~ Note: Please do not copy or remove poem from this page.©

~Dear God (Questions~

Dear God,
I have some questions for you
And Lord my questions are not few
Where did you come from
Why am I here
What is the reason for all I fear

Why is my life
Never what it should be
What is the purpose
You've set out for me

Why cant I see you
Why should we try
Why cant we ever know why
Or have answered our questions
To better our lives

Why must this be
Only a trial
Why hardly ever
A reason to smile

Can it not all be simple my Lord
All you must do is speak a word
But instead we are stuck here wondering why
As we fall apart and cry

Dear Lord, I love you and believe
But these questions I conceive
Pull at the edges of my heart
And I feel my faith may soon depart

So Lord please help me understand
All that you have planned
So I can again fully believe
In this life im forced to lead

~Alisha Heckelbeck~ Note: Please do not copy or remove poem from this page. ©

~The Sanity Of Holding On~

Im here alone again today
I close my eyes and breath
Im holding on to nothing
But your memory I cant leave

I pull myself together
And I go on with my day
Knowing that no matter what
Here in my heart you'll stay

With everything I do
Your always on my mind
Thinking of you constantly
I feel Im walking blind

I continue to hold onto nothing
I feel it keeps me sane
For everything we've lost
I feel I am to blame

~Alisha Heckelbeck~ Note: Please do not copy or remove poem. ©

Wow this stuff is sooooo old. I was such a depressive little person, I want to smack myself. I realize Im not even the same person anymore after reading all this. So much has happened since my last post, and so much has changed. Life and reality hit hard.

"DEATH OF THE BARSTOOL!"


Kali: so how old are you two..

Suzi: "Twenty but since you're asleep" She picks her up and takes to her to one of the spare rooms.
She covers her up and leaves the key on the nightstand.
She returns downstairs and is once again found laying on top of the bar.  

Kali: *wakes up and stumbles out of bed*
*runs into wall due to new surroundings* that is so not the bathroom....
*goes back downstairs*
27 here.. 
*walks over to table where dante is and sits down*
"hi"  *blink*....*blink*
"Have you considered that you may have an anger control problem there.." O.O 

Rain: *walks into bar* 

Suzy: "Who me?....No...not at all...I can control my anger just fine."
She turns to Dante and yells "You whoremonkey."
She turns back to lady Kalimar "see...perfectly under control." 

Kali: "yes umm I can see that. Definatly controlled..ehem" 
Looks at rain* did that hurt? 

Suzi: "Hello there, welcome to the Black Rose, can i get you anything?"
She turns to Dante "i'm sorry, am i not supposed to make you wet?" She winked playfully at him.  

Dante: He smiles "I always thought it was the other way around, talk about a twist in things..."
he trails off in thought "ick" he runs around pulling on his hair "GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD!!!!"
he falls over after running into and tripping over another barstool.
He lays on the ground staring at the ceiling "....fucking barstools...." 

Rain: "just a little"
*recognizes her sister via the typical smart ass comment and goes over and sits down by her*

Kali: *contemplates* I believe that should be the other way around.. he should get you wet...
ehem..
hey kiddo  *points to self* Aren't I irresistably cute?! 

Rain: yes yes you are.
Your downright smexifull.
I think shes cute.. do you think shes cute?
come on i think shes cute.  

Dante: "Little vain, but cute I guess" he says still on the floor. 

Kali: bad barstool. *kicks it for him*
Bloody hell sis you've managed to create a cuteness poll

Dante:He watches the barstool fall from her kick "that makes you all the much more cute." 

Rain:*whispers to dante* gotta tell her shes cute shes my sister she might kill me or something.
"so how bout that cute little bunny" 

Kali: Woot for cuteness points!
*extends hand to help him up* 

Dante: He nods a fall with a smile and looks at the hand "no,
I figure if I don't move the barstools can't get to meh" he smiles up at her "thank you anyway"

Suzi: "It's not the barstool's fault that you're dumb"

Kali:*giggles* are you afraid of the big bad barstool? no worries I'll protect you!!!! 

Rain:We need gummy bears....
MUWAHAHAHA RISE UP MY YUMMY GUMMYS!!!! 

Kali:Thats just disturbing on a level I can't even express. 

Rain: Why cuz they're cuter than you? 

Kali: possibly.. but i taste better....

Rain: O.o .......And you say im disturbing on a high level? I think that was slightly higher.... 

Kali: *grins innocently* I have no idea what your talking about. 

Rain: *blinks*... 

Suzi: "I prefer gummy bears...no offence"  
 
Kali: LMAO..... to each there own right. 

Rain: yes..and mine would be gummi bears. 

Dante: I'm not sure I mind either way... whatever works? 

Kali: Imagine what mcgyver could do with gummy bears..
or better yet.. chocolate sauce and whip cream....
and that has been todays completely random comment
brought to you by the bunny broadcast network..Have a nice day! 

Rain: and thank you sister....that brought a very bad visual to mind. 

Dante: looks confused "what?" shrugs

Kali:  
*grabs barstool and sneaks up behind dante...Sets it behind him...slips away quietly*
*giggles* 

Rain: *points behind dante* OMG a barstool!!!!!!!!!!!! Watch out its stalking you!!!!
RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Dante: He looks behind him "AHH" he runs forward and falls over another one.
Lying on the floor again all he has to say is "damnit..." 

Kali: *runs to help dante up trips over same barstool and falls on top of him* ahh crap.. 

Rain: *grabs barstool and runs after dante with it*muahahhahaah 

Dante: He looks at her "why ello" he smiles then looks up at the oncoming barstool "TOOL OF DEATH AND DOOM!!!" 

Kali: "hiya" *wink*
Rolls away before the evil barstool can attack her..AHHHHHHHHHH "SAVE ME" 

Dante: He rolls out of the way with her lying next to her "name's Dante, good to meet cha." 
He stands "don't worry I'll protect you" he pulls out a fake sword made of cardboard and swings wildly at the barstool.  
 
Rain:  AND NOW I SHALL END IT ALL! MUAHHAHAHAAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!
*sets barstool down* 


Kali: *swoons* "My hero"

Dante: He turns and pretends to sheath the fake blade "you are safe m'lady"  
 
Rain:o.O
*picks back up barstool* 
*lunges at dante with barstool*

Dante: He unsheathes his acutal katana and braces the blade with his other hand
slicing the barstool instantly pulling it back before it hits fall "

Kali: *peeks out from under table* is it safe ? 

Rain: *crys* poor barstool! Meany!

SCORPIO
EXTREMELY sexy.
Energetic.
Predict future.
Most erotic.
Freak in bed.
GREAT kisser.
Not one to mess with

Does anybody hear her-Casting crowns

She is running
A hundred miles an hour in the wrong direction
She is trying
But the canyon's ever widening
In the depths of her cold heart
So she sets out on another misadventure just to find
She's another two years older
And she's three more steps behind

Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?
Or does anybody even knows she's going down today
Under the shadow of our steeple
With all the lost and lonely people
Searching for the hope that's tucked away in you and me
Does anybody hear her? Can anybody see?

She is yearning
For shelter and affection
That she never found at home
She is searching
For a hero to ride in
To ride in and save the day
And in walks her prince charming
And he knows just what to say
Momentary lapse of reason
And she gives her heart away

If judgement looms under every steeple
If lofty glances from lofty people
Can't see past her scarlet letter
And we never even met her