Thanks to
Kohta Hirano
the author of Hellsing
Here is the interconnected webbiness of stuff...
Amen
The Hellsing fan club wiki
[Black_Dragon_123]
One of my friends
Nosgoth
The hangout wiki of one of my friends
[sktchy]
Another one of my friends
[ValmontDracul]
One of my best friends ever and the man who introduced me to Hellsing, for which I am eternally gratefull
O.K. I know what you are wondering, so here it is...
What is "The Abyss"?
To answer, the Abyss is a place inside of everyone of us, inside of our hearts, our very souls. During dark times, we sometimes gaze into this Abyss.
Few ever enter the Abyss.
Of those who do... they usually end up killing themselves.
Let me tell you the story of me and
my journy into the Abyss.
It happened to me during the middle of my freshman year of highschool. Bad grades, problems in my life in general, all the pain and the emotions built up inside. It got to a point where the only thing stopping me from killing myself was my aversion to pain. But day by day, I was teaching myself to love pain by slicing open my forarm. By this point I was already beyond redemption. I had fallen to my soul's ruin. I was chained in the Abyss. What does it feel like? It is as if the real you, the you that feels passion and anger and humor and most of all, hope, gets locked away inside, and a flat "paper you" takes your place. I was a very convincing actor, this "paper me". Nobody ever knew anything was wrong. Nobody knew that all the smiles and laughter had been faked for nearly a year. By the end of the first trimester of my sophmore year, I was ready to die. I had lost all hope. I JUST WANTED TO FUCKING DIE! But I didn't. There was a football game at the highschool that night, so I decided to go to it. Maybe I was hoping to find something to hold me to this world. I don't know. Anyway, I got there, and I met up with one of my friends, Quinn. He introduced me to a couple of his friends, and one of them was...Liz. Liz Buell. Really god damn hot. But I, stuck in my Abyss didn't care about that. What I cared about was that she looked at me...
in me...into my hearts depths, and she smiled.
She made me smile...made me laugh for real...for the first time in nearly a year. I fell in love right then and there. I couldn't kill myself that night.
And of course, I now know that she was cheating on me and was sleeping around on me. Funny, isn't it?
But I'll never consider suicide again. Life's too precious. So if anyone reading this is thinking about suicide, I know how you feel, and all I can say is don't do it. Story of my life (to make a long story short...)
THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE!