Stupid Moments ~ PE

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More Stupid Moments ~ PE

Not to be mean, but the people at [Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ] and my school are...well...dumb. Or they can be. Here is a collection of the stupid things they say. The above two pages are from a very special PE class.


(Margaret) Wow! I found a button!!
(Horizon) Is it a lucky button?
(Margaret) I don't know...let me eat it and we'll see.
(Horizon) What??
(Margaret) Don't ask...I don't know.

(A couple students were talking about Akon during Advisory)
(Desiree) Olivia told me he was gay.
(Adam) No he's not! He has like four wives.
(Desiree) Oh, he's a polygamist?
(Adam) ... Because he's from Africa?

(Margaret's speech class had this assignment to do eulogies for celebrities. Their teacher was gone one day, so they went to the computer lab and the teacher there asked what they were doing)
(Joey) We're working on our orgy.
(Mrs. Rickwartz) O.O What??
(Joey) Eulogy! Eulogy...
(Horizon was telling her friends in her art class how she was third in her graduating class)
(Josephine) I would hate to be third. I mean, you're not first, or second, you're just...third.
(Horizon) Excuse me?
(Josephine) Oh! I didn't mean it like that! I just think it would stink to be third. I'd be so mad!
(Joey) You're digging your hole deeper!
(Horizon) You're so mean!
(Josephine) I swear, I didn't mean it like that!
(Horizon) Whatever. Weren't you third born, anyway?
(Josephine) Yes! And I hate it!

(This happened in Horizon's chemistry class)
(Mr Rock) Because Carbon as five valence electrons, but Carbon has four.
(Horizon laughed for the next ten straight minutes...it wasn't really that funny, but she was in a weird mood)

(Mrs. Eubanks) Bill O'Riley always uses the word "bloviate" and I know what it means, but I can't find it in any dictionary.
(Adam G) Bloviate??
(Class) *laughs*
[then we get off on this ridiculous tangent about the word, putting it in sentences to make it sound perverted and funny]
(Adam G) Senator Kerry was arrested yesterday for public bloviation.
(Margaret) Go bloviate yourself!
[our next class was religion, so we decided to test our teacher, Mr. Stocker]
(Adam G) I have a serious question. In the catholic church, is bloviation considered a sin?
(Stocker) Um...no.
(Adam G) Really?
(Stocker) Bloviation, as in talking on and on and on about something?
(Adam G) Oh, I don't think we're talking about the same kind of bloviation.
(class) *hysterical laughter*

(Horizon) I'm so old...I'm the oldest I've ever been!!

(Horizon's dad) I'm pretty tall for my height.

(Lauren) Dr. Maldanado's got a PhD.
(Brittany) In his truck??
(Lauren) They'll ask me where I'm from and I'll be like "Texas." and they'll ask "Where's your hat and horse?" and I'll say "I came bareback!"
(everybody) What???


*This Stupid Moment comes from health class...and it's nasty.*
(Ryan) What's so bad about eating shaved pussy?
(Desiree) You eat hair??
(Ryan) OMG No! It's shaved!!
(we all laugh)
(Desiree) What, then?
(Ryan) Putting the diaper back on when you're through.
(Desiree) Ew!
(Patrick) Oh yeah? How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
(Horizon) How many?
(Patrick) It depends on how hard you throw.
(Horizon) Nice.
(Patrick) Well...how many babies does it take to shingle a roof?
(Horizon) ... How many?
(Patrick) It depends on how thinnly you slice them.
(all) O.o
(Desiree) That's mean!!
(Horizon) Yeah? "You eat hair??"
(all laugh hysterically)

(Gerardo is this guy at our school who acts very retarded and yet he thinks he's cool. I can't describe it, but he's just awful, we hate him. Anyway, him and Andrew were talking today in the Chem lab when Horizon was experimenting with the guys *haha that sounds perverted...Horizon was actually experimenting...as in chemicals and stuff...haha* and she overheard Gerardo say this...and she couldn't resist)
(Gerardo) God, there are so many dicks at this school.
(Horizon) You like that don't you?

(This is kind of an old one, we've just never put it up here)
(We were at a park at the end of the year for our end of school party sort of thing and we were on the swings talking. Johnny, a guy who used to be in our class, was right beside us)
(Horizon, talking to Ra and Kate) Ooh! Who wants to come to my house?
(Johnny) I do!!!!

(This happened a long time ago in PE and we've forgotten to put it up here. No it happened in Health. But we've still forgotten to put it up here.)
(Horizon) Patrick, why do you have a needle in your pants??
(Desiree) Eww!! Do you want to get HIV??
(Patrick) You don't see me sticking my needle in Ryan do you?

(This happened in US History today:
We were all talking about [arna] and how the class would be different without him. We talked about all the funny things he did, like how he talked like he was gay and made everyone laugh, or just plain did something retarded.
Anyway, one of Patricks favorite things to do in History last year was say "Si Senor" in his gay accent and it drove Mr. Phares crazy!!! So Diego, one of the students, brought that up and Mr Phares just groaned and looked at the ceiling, then said:)
(Mr. Phares) God...I saw him the other day and later that night I dreamt about him! I dreamt he came to my door and when I answered it he said *with a spanish accent* "May I mow your lawn, senor?" and I replied, "Only if you can do it in an hour." And then...lord help me, he said "Si senor!!"
(We all cracked up and laughed for a full three minutes. It was so funny.)

(this was in US History)
(Adam G.) Who wrote Uncle Tom's Cabin?
(Adam R.) Uncle Tom!

(This is from US History too)
(Mr. Phares) What Native American tribes fought in the Civil War?
(Krista) The Aztecs

(Phares) What county do we live in?
(Adam) USA!!

(teacher, last period day before spring break in the 8th grade lol) "Thirty five minutes till school's out!!"
(Horizon and me in unison) "YAY!!"
(not even a minute later, Horizon) "Ra, what time is it??"

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