[NiCi{LoSerFacE}]'s diary

988324  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2007-10-31
Written: (6041 days ago)

Well it's once again October...A month which I hate except for the Halloween part of it...2 years ago when I was a freshmen in high school my best friend got hit by a car and since then the whole month of October has been bad for me...But this year I think it might be a good one this year. I have a boyfriend that I love very much and that loves me too, I have a lot of friends again, I'm usually happy all the time, and life is just good lately. But I'm wondering how long it will take for me to try to fuck things up with Brian. I don't want to lose him but knowing me I will fuck it up somehow. I like to try and push ppl away so that's probably gonna be what happens. And then my life is all gonna be hell and what not.
I guess the only thing I can do now is to just not fuck it up with him. All I have to do is trust him, right?
--Well thats it for now...
------♥ always,
--------NiCi{LoSerFacE}

912544  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2007-02-21
Written: (6294 days ago)

I AM TOTALLY AGAINST ABORTION!!
IF U ARE TOO PASTE THIS ON UR HOUSE OR DIARY!!

Mummy keep me safe, mummy keep me warm,
And with all your love, help me to form.
I’m six weeks today and a birthday gift to me
is a pair of bright blue eyes so that one day I might see.
I’ve already got my arms; I have a puggy little nose,
and at the end of my feet are funny little things called toes.
I’m looking forward now to life; ice-cream, snails,
Teddy bears and long fairy tales.
Where are you going I wonder today??
In a bus, in a car, far far away.
Why are you lying down being pushed on four wheels??
This doesn’t usually happen-how funny it feels.
Banging through doors-all people in green,
If they hurt you mummy, mummy just scream.
Don’t go to sleep mummy, don’t leave me alone.
Mummy I’m scared, I want to go home.
Mummy what’s happening, I’m starting to cry.
Run quick mummy, I don’t want to die.
They’re killing me mummy, they’re pulling me apart.
My legs, my arms, they’re cutting my heart.
Goodbye mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy goodbye.
Thanks for trying but I won’t see the sky
I won’t see the birds or the grass or the trees.
I won’t sing sweet songs or feel a strange breeze.
I love you dear mummy, I really really do.
And I hope dear mummy that you loved me too

if this touched ur heart then please please repost this and spread the story we have to save lives even b4 they are in our world.

912543  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2007-02-21
Written: (6294 days ago)



Month One] Mommy, I am only 8 inches long, but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it, I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.]
Month Two
Mommy, today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me, you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here.
[Month Three
You know what mommy, I'm a girl!! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad. It makes me sad too, and I cry with you even though you can't hear me.
]
Month Four
Mommy, my hair is starting to grow. It is very short and fine, but I will have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes, and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too.
[Month Five
You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby mommy, your baby. I think and feel. Mommy, what's an abortion?
]
Month Six
I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor called it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy! HELP me!
[Month Seven
Mommy, I am okay. I am in Jesus's arms. he is holding me. He told me about abortion. Why didn't you want me mommy?
]

899381  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2007-01-16
Written: (6329 days ago)

Everybody wonders "what if" once in a while. Just fill it out about the person that posted this. Don't forget to be honest because no one sees this but me! what would you do IF...


I died:

I kissed you:

I fell:

I lived next door to you:

I showed up at your house unexpectedly:

I was murdered:

I cried:

I asked you to marry me:

I was hospitalized:


::WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT MY::

Personality:

Eyes:

Hair:

Family:

Smile:


::WOULD YOU::

Trust me enough to sleep in the same bed as me?

Keep a secret if i told you one?

Hold my hand?

Study with me?

Cook for me?

Love me?

Date me?


::HAVE YOU EVER::

Lied to make me feel better?

Wanted to kiss me?

Wanted to kill me?

Broke my heart?

Thought I was unbearably annoying?

Hated me?

Wanted to tell me something but didn't?

Wondered about my sanity?

Wanted to do something to me?




::More::

When and how did we meet?

Describe me in three words:

What was your first impression of me?

What do you think of me now?

What reminds you of me?

Could you see us together forever?

When was the last time you saw me?

Are you gonna repost this to see what I say about you?

860988  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-10-07
Written: (6430 days ago)

i cant take this anymore...i hate october it the worst montho out of the whole year...last year on october 19th as some of you namely my really close friends know my best friend got hit by a truck i cant stop thinking about him and now because the 1 yr anniversary of his accident is only 12 days away i cant stop crying...i still feel really bad about falling asleep the night before and never calling him back on the 18th and that summer i was supposed to go to his dads wedding with him but i totally blew it off to hang out with my ex-boyfriend....i just wish this nightmare would end and everything could be back to normal but i know thats never gonna happen so i guess i just have to live with it no matter how much it sux and there are two other people who i know are hurting as much as i am about this right now and none of us can take this anymore he was the last person on earth that desevered this and yet it happened to him anyway i wish i could have been there to save him but i wasnt and thats hurts too i just dont know what to do anymore

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