My life as of now.

I've learned a lot in the past year. I've gained friends, and lost friends. I've gotten in more trouble and learned more lessons. I've bitched, fought, complained, and finally realized how immature I really was. I'm finally learning who I really am, and it's not what everyone thinks I am. I guess at school and at shows, I come off as kind of a "hard-ass bitch". Yeah, I can be a bitch, but I'm actually really nice when I'm in a good mood (which happens to be a lot lately). I care so much about a lot of people. I have always tried so hard to be the best friend I could be to all of my friends, no matter if I considered them my best friend, or just an acquaintance. I think a friend is someone that you can trust, care about, and know they will always be there for you. I see so many people ruin friendships because they have small disagreements, or they try to "get back" at whoever they feel did them wrong. I've learned to be able to let things go, when people do you wrong. It makes things easier, and avoids a lot of confrontation. Don't get me wrong, sometimes it's better to stand up for yourself, or even to let people know something is bothering you. If that person can't understand where you are coming from and won't accept that they were wrong and continue to do whatever is hurting you. Then you are better without them. Letting people walk out of your life can hurt a lot, especially when they mean so much to you. Sometimes people just need breaks in friendships. They need to find out who they really are and maybe spend time with other people. Throughout life, everyone will continue to change and grow into better people. We will always continue to meet new people, make new friends, and lose old ones. Life is about spending time with people you love, learning and gaining knowledge about the world, and finally realizing how beautiful the world really is. When I wake up in the morning, I don't think "Eww I have to go to school" like I use to. I get up, look out the window and think about how lucky I am to be alive and have all the choices and opportunities that I have.

October.Octavia.


I'm trapped in the playground
With all the best serial killers in town

I tried to hide my optimism but
Everybody started bringing me down

It was October but now it's over
But everybody's still dressed up

Somebody robbed the thrift store
It was the guy with the plastic hatchet running around

I tried to be an individual
But they copied me before I could

It was October but now it's over
But everybody's still dressed up


It's over Octavia.

Metaphors, the truth in contradiction.

I've braved the storm. Let's smile and nod like this is all alright.
I've plateaued.
Rewriting the dictionary is no easy task. They tax you for every breath. All we did was try.
Nauseated by feelings brings me around. I've had my head buried in a book since the age of five.
The fight has begun, where are you now? This beauty is forsaken, but it's everything you've wanted.
When will you abandon this trajectory? That's right, nothing but the best for our own version of royalty.
It's family ties and blood-shot eyes.
I'll lose you, when you traverse deep into the city.
This is choppy.
This is elegant.
This is low-grade.
This is first-rate.
This is nothing.
This is everything.

Dear Tyler,

Revenge is for the weak
Lucky for you im fragile
Justice is all I seek
Seeing you sad will do me for the while

You never cared about me
Or any of my friends
Its about time that you see
That this must be the end

Your lies
Don't work on me anymore
Your eyes
The things I use to adore
What now
Did you not understand?

I don't want to take your hand

Denial is for the blind
Lucky for you I took your eyes
I left my feelings for you behind
I guess its not big surprise

You never cared about me
Or any of my friends
Its about time that you see
That this must be the end


Your lies
Don't work on me anymore
Your eyes
The things I use to adore
What now
Did you not understand?

I don't want to take your hand

Your lies
Don't work on me anymore
Your eyes
The things I use to adore
What now
Did you not understand?

I don't want to take your hand


I don't want to take your hand