OMG!
That's about all I can say...
Aulden... We were talking about missing each other, and he said he loved me...
WTF?
As if my life isn't already confusing. I've always wanted to hear him say that and believe it, I think I finally can. But is it too late?
I mean... I am about to get married in September...
AH!
Today is my birthday, but dangit!
I AM SICK!
It's a bronchial feeling thing because it hurts when I breath and I'm also coughing a lot...
But hey!
I get to go play Laser Tag!!!
What is one supposed to do when they are in love with two people, and also have been crushin on one since forever?
Ha, fuck the one, and screw the two?
lol jk...but seriously?
oh well
So I didn't REALLY see Joe today. But I did take a good look at his life he has now.
The one without me.
The one I should be a part of.
The band the life the everything slipped from me when I left. I left for good and I yelled at him.
I hurt him.
It hurt me.
I'm viewing him from the window and all I see is happiness with the guys and the girl I don't know.
Yeah I miss him. He was my best friend. I left, but I had no choice. I miss him.
I miss him
[oh god I miss him]
My "friends" should go kill themselves.
They aren't very kind.
They don't care
They never cared I think.
They don't appreciate me
They don't know me
They never knew.
And now because of their misunderstandi
They must not know my capability.
They must suffer.
I suffered for days.
I cried for years.
I've always been different.
I've never been like them.
They've always looked away in shame
Like I've killed them.
Hypocrites.
They've never seen the shadows like I have
They've never seen the dead rise like I have.
Their soul has never been torn like mine.
One day they'll remember me.
And they'll die.
They'll see me.
Smiling at them.
And they'll remember what they have done.
Oh friends, you'll remeber what you've done to me.
*cough* my throat hurts and i want to play the game!!! *sigh*new shoes are smell funnyish...i want some food...yaah!
<I LOVE YOU!>
valentine's day is a shame
all it gets is fame
no one cares
that it's not fair
oh well
how swell....
i'm sick of people's perverse ways.<
they all sicken me. everyone is always like
"oh me me me!" tell you what...we don't
care. even your friends do not care. they're
sick of your continuing whining and wish
that you would die in a fifty foot hole.
then, when you least expect it, these people,
these horrible excuses anyway, try
to be nice to you. even after they have just
said the most awful things of you. like
when they say very inappropriate things of
you, then all of a sudden they expect you
to help them out because: "aren't you
my friend!?" NO! no one is. they're sick
of you too. can't you see that your
relentless whining makes all your best lovers
despise you?! they laugh at you while you
cry about some person giving you the
cold shoulder. take my advice:
"Shut up and live, don't worry about
yourself. live for others and not yourself"
a day in the life of ashley m carver consists of being bored 24/7
JOE HUGGED ME---wOo-hOo!!
People looked at me weird today at school. I wonder if I had something in my teeth bc it was at lunch. I should've kicked those bastards fucking staring at me!!! Joe came to my house, how wicked is that? VERY!! Aww Terri went to her cousin's so now my friend is gone, I am sad.