Destined to be caught in between. Yeppers. So be it. :P

I Just Wish...


Have you ever loved someone so much,
and you knew that they loved you too, but the only thing keeping you away from true happiness, was your family...

Have you ever had something so great,
that when it was gone, you would do anything to have it back...

Have you ever cried so hard,
because you needed someone in your life, but it wasn't allowed...

Haver you ever thought about someone so much,
that you find yourself smiling at the mention of him and crying at the same time...

Have you ever tried to forget so hard,
but realized that you would rather die than not remember...

Your solitude is welcome, welcome.
Your attitude is welcome, welcome.
You are welcome...

This phrase from the song repeats itself in my head and I have yet to figure out the meaning of it to me completely. I feel like I'm at a breaking point in my life, I just want to burst open and show what I can do.

I don't want to be afraid anymore.

I am currently reading the book Next by Michael Crichton and I was wondering if any of you peoples had read it and if so, we should talk about it because it's so freaking crazy!!

Guys, I know that this is going to sound really retarded but I am very shocked about this nonsense.
FREAKIN DOLPHINS ARE CAPABLE OF GANG RAPE!! THEY ARE NOT ONLY CAPABLE BUT THEY PERFORM THIS HEINEOUS ACT!!!

I have always disliked dolphins, but I have never quite understood why or anything. Recently, I was reading someones blog about the likeness between humand and animals and something of that sort and i ran across the entry that mentioned that dolphins do that! I was in utter shock and metnioned it to all of my friends. I even told my dad and he said, "Of course they do." WHAT?! Why didn't anyone inform me of this? I would have liked to know about this. So now I guess that I actually have a reason to dislike them. Dangit, I can't believe it.

Well life, it seems that once again, you are running amock. Oh, how I wish that you would wait for me, come back and take my hand. Your interactions with others leaves me pondering about what I just did. Were I given the chance would I do it again? Misled Affection or Effections. Its all nonsense and you know it.. but then why do you still believe? Go back to that safe, warm place that calls you back constantly. However, it seems that when you go there, you are bombarded by more questions.Answers slip through your grasp. Yet again. Life seems to be repeating itself. Does that mean that I missed something and this is my chance to change it?

... Over and over and over and over again,..

,........perplexing motives

this stuff is crazy. though choices aren't at all bad, Their interactions with me are unnerving and I find myself confused... and liking it. Why is this so? It has been so long and it is only when I found peace with myself that others step into the light to observe my weaknesses. Do they see them? They might, but I doubt that they know from whence they came. Turmoil, yet i fall willingly into it's tight embrace. I wan't to say so much, but I will say nothing, lest I be heard in vain.

Tell me more,______.
Tell me more,_____.
Tell me more,______.


Figure me out.

WHAT THE HELL??????? OH MY FREAKIN GOOOSH!!!!!! I don't know what im doing...... Is this wrong...

gah, idk what it is, probably because I have one more day of school left, Stuff is really starting to Irk me!!! Freakin Future looming overheard. Literally> I stapled my college letters to the ceiling!!! idk what i want!! Not just educationally though.. In life too. Everything is stupid to me right now, Love-stupid. Life-stupid. Me-stupid.Clothes-stupid. School-Stupid. All I have are my thoughts, my small, insignificant thoughts. I hope one day they will grow and then I will share them with you.. If your not stupid.

Not the best pic, but i like it. Tawny and I, super cool!!

Moisture falling from the sky.
Droplets slide down my face.
Rain is mysterious and sheilding.


Only then can you not discern my tears from the weather.

Facts Guys should know about girls



when a girl is quiet
millions of things are running through her mind



When a girl is not arguing
she is thinking deeply



When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions,
she is wondering how long you'll be around



When a girl answers "I'm fine" after a few seconds
she is not fine at all



When a girl stares at you
she is wondering why you are lying



When a girl lays on your chest
she is wishing for you to be hers forever



When a girl calls you everyday
she is seeking your atention



When a girl says "I love you"
she means it



When a girl says that she can't live without you
She has made up her mind that you are her future



When a girl says "I miss you"
No one in this world can miss you more than that



When a girl says No
She means no


Sorry if you were expecting something deep, its just something that i think Guys should know.

Also, Just to save space, Heres a deep song, kinda..


All-American Rejects: It Ends Tonight

Your subtleties
They strangle me
I can't explain myself at all.
And all the wants
And all the needs
And I don't want to need at all.

The walls start breathing
My minds unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

A falling star
Least I fall alone.
I can't explain what you can't explain.
You're finding things that you didn't know
I look at you with such distain

The walls start breathing
My minds unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.

[chorus]
When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

Now I'm on my own side
It's better than being on your side
It's my fault when you're blind
It's better that I see it through your eyes

All these thoughts locked inside
Now you're the first to know

When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends when darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.

When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight.

If you get sad easily, this might increase the chances of that happening today...


Enclosed on both sides,
Sadness creeps through dark eyes
A black haze of mourning
Surrounds her head
The feeling is mutual,
The feeling is dead.
She tells herself that tomorrows a new day,
Just to keep the fears and the tears away.
Naturally depressed, rarely does she grin
Surrounded by love she refuses to give in
Tending to her wounds, she dreams of flying,
Then realizing her false hopes, she continues sighing.
Her life is good but she can’t understand,
Why everything she holds onto just flows through her hand.
Nothing is solid; yes she yearns to touch it
Just a few more steps and she’ll reach the summit,
Almost to the top,
The mountain fades to gray
Looking around upon death and decay.
Lonely and cold
She won’t fit into life’s mold
Shutting off her mind she switches off the light,
And prepares for the next sadness fight.


Sorry I had to get that out, its a bit depressing i know,

To my Heartache: Why do you have to be so sweet? If you weren't i wouldn't want to be with you so much.
To my Soulsaver: Why do you have to make me laugh? I you didn't I would plunge into depression.
To my MemoryGiver: Why do you have to be so far? If you weren't i wouldn't miss you that much.
To my DreamMaker: Why do have to have that face? If you didn't I wouldn't want to embrace you like i do.......
To You: Why do you have to be who you are? If you didn't i wouldnt be who i am.


Thank you ______, for everything

Dear Friends,

I have just read and signed the online petition:

  "Should our music be banned?"

hosted on the web by PetitionOnline.com, the free online petition
service, at:

  http://www.PetitionOnline.com/jl32539/

I personally agree with what this petition says, and I think you might
agree, too. If you can spare a moment, please take a look, and
consider
signing yourself.

Best wishes,

Janie

WHen you look in the back of the book, you don't always find the ending you want.

WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This week has been the blackest, darkest, most depressing day of my life. The only person that can comfort me, hates me.......

Those who read this will undoubtedly not understand.

UGH!! Freaking Waterdhavian creatures are getting on my nerves!! I already rescued like 3 of them or something. The Druid, the Brain eating thingy and Gulnan. Damnit this last one is located in the Bloodsailors place somewhere. have to find it. If i don't there will be no cure and everyone will die!! ah, oh well, I tried. lol

I win!! Oh, btw, I must remember to join [Proffesional Idiots].