He Said, She Said
The movie “He Said, She Said” features an lecture by Deborah Tanner, discussing the contrasting ways in which men and women use language to negotiate groups and one-on-one interaction. According to Tanner, men communicate in terms of hierarchy and assertiveness (alpha status), whereas women communicate to emphasize connection via similarity and equality.
In early childhood, the patterns begin to emerge in young boys and girls. The video presents us with an image of four young boys sitting in a circle at playtime; their conversation is a battle of mushrooming exaggerations about how far each boy hit a certain ball. “I hit it all the way over there,” says one. “I hit it all the way to the sky,” says another. The third says, “I hit it all the way into space, to which the fourth crushes them all, saying, “I hit it all the way to God!”
Little girls, of the same age, often play two at a time. Their conversations are full of agreement and reassurance. If one girl makes a statement about her dad, the other girl may make the same statement about her dad, whether or not it is true or not, or whether or not she even has a dad, just for the sake of agreeing--to establish a connection by showing that she is the same as the other girl.
In both instances, the children are often familiar with the rituals involved, and though they may exaggerate, this is understood in the subtext of interaction. Rituals of conversation are treated like a game.
Tanner remarked that women are much more indirect about getting their own way, citing the example of a woman who, on a long drive, asked her husband if he wanted to stop for a drink. He answered no, but thirty minutes up the road, she was angry at him, because she had wanted to stop for a drink. She expected that he would answer, then ask what she wanted. He expected that she would challenge his answer with her own suggestion if it didn’t satisfy her. However, women tend to start wide around an issue and narrow it down to the final question, so to take in as much information and establish the most democratic decision possible, so that everyone can be satisfied.
In defense of women, Tanner added that men can be indirect, also. Many a woman has complained that a man gives her advice or a solution every time she attempts to vent or express her dilemmas to him. This is because men seek status through autonomy and self-sufficiency, and to ask for help would be akin to admitting defeat. So men see giving unasked for advice as cutting out a humiliating step in the equation--out of politeness. Men also tend toward indirectness in regards to apology.
In terms of men and the pursuit of alpha status, it has also been noted that alpha male give the orders, and men follow what they are told lose status. I have found that the same is true in business environments between men and women competing for dominance and/or respect; and in a group context between two women competing for the role of alpha female. Some might argue that the same power-struggle exists even inside of romantic relationships--that if either partner gives too much, or is too eager to please, then he or she will lose status with the other partner, who may take the dominant role in the relationship. I was raised with that mindset, and yet I never really bought into it. It confuses me how adamant my family has always been on the stance that courtship is necessarily a power-struggle, a negotiation for dominance, even while most of them have long-lived successful marriages. I don’t believe that they applied this standard to their own relationships.
Although traditional gender contrasts, roles (in the United States), and classifications have shown the tendency to lump me into the ‘male’ category, I was surprised to discover that this perspective did not. In fact, I find that gender-specific communication styles are apparent in even the most gender-defying individuals I know--with one exception. Truly, that she is such an exception may have caused her more trouble than anything else in life. Not only is she exceedingly masculine in approach toward situations and interests, but also in conversation. Before this lecture, I never understood why, even though we have been friends since childhood, sometimes she speaks in a way that surprises and offends me to this day. After watching this video, it occurred to me that--even though we have known each other for as long as we have--I am still expecting her to communicate in a feminine style. I am startled and a little appalled at her frequent necessity to compete verbally, even with women, to one-up others, to openly express and challenge the opinions of others. Instead of attempting to connect with others on the grounds of similarities, it’s almost as if she strives to connect with others by means of a direct challenge. A verbal glove-slap, to test both men and women. Oddly, it isn’t some complicated psychological test or rite of passage into her social circle--if I understand her correctly, it’s just second-nature to her to communicate that way, even with long term friends, boyfriends, relatives and total strangers.

Habitation
by Margaret Atwood

Marriage is not
a house or even a tent

it is before that, and colder:

the edge of the forest, the edge
of the desert
the unpainted stairs
at the back where we squat
outside, eating popcorn

the edge of the receding glacier

where painfully and with wonder
at having survived even
this far

we are learning to make fire

Camomile Tea
by Katherine Mansfield (1888-1923)

Outside the sky is light with stars;
There's a hollow roaring from the sea.
And, alas! for the little almond flowers,
The wind is shaking the almond tree.

How little I thought, a year ago,
In the horrible cottage upon the Lee
That he and I should be sitting so
And sipping a cup of camomile tea.

Light as feathers the witches fly,
The horn of the moon is plain to see;
By a firefly under a jonquil flower
A goblin toasts a bumble-bee.

We might be fifty, we might be five,
So snug, so compact, so wise are we!
Under the kitchen-table leg
My knee is pressing against his knee.

Our shutters are shut, the fire is low,
The tap is dripping peacefully;
The saucepan shadows on the wall
Are black and round and plain to see.

Love Sonnet LXXIX
by Pablo Neruda

By night, Love, tie your heart to mine, and the two
together in their sleep will defeat the darkness
like a double drum in the forest, pounding
against the thick wall of wet leaves.

Night travel: black flame of sleep
that snips the threads of the earth's grapes,
punctual as a headlong train that would haul
shadows and cold rocks, endlessly.

Because of this, Love, tie me to a purer motion,
to the constancy that beats in your chest
with the wings of a swan underwater,

so that our sleep might answer all the sky's
starry questions with a single key,
with a single door the shadows had closed

++
Love Sonnet XLV
by Pablo Neruda

Don't go far off, not even for a day, because--
because--I don't know how to say it: a day is long
and I will be waiting for you, as in an empty station
when the trains are parked off somewhere else, asleep.

Don't leave me, even for an hour, because
then the little drops of anguish will all run
together,
the smoke that roams looking for a home will drift
into me, choking my lost heart.

Oh, may your silhouette never dissolve on the beach;
may your eyelids never flutter into the empty
distance.
Don't leave me for a second, my dearest,

because in that moment you'll have gone so far
I'll wander mazily over all the earth, asking,
Will you come back? Will you leave me here, dying?

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Love Sonnet VII (in Espanol below)
by Pablo Neruda

Come with me, I said, and no one knew
where, or how my pain throbbed,
no carnations or barcaroles for me,
only a wound that love had opened.

I said it again: Come with me, as if I were dying,
and no one saw the moon that bled in my mouth
or the blood that rose into silence.
O Love, now we can forget the star that has such thorns!

That is why, when I heard your voice repeat
Come with me, it was as if you had let loose
the grief, the love, the fury of a cork-trapped wine

that geysers flooding from deep in its vault;
in my mouth I felt the taste of fire again,
of blood and carnations, of rock & scald.

++
Love Sonnet XVII
by Pablo Neruda

I don't love you as if you were the salt-rose, topaz
or arrow of carnations that propagate fire:
I love you as certain dark things are loved,
secretly, between the shadow and the soul.
I love you as the plant that doesn't bloom and carries
hidden within itself the light of those flowers,
and thanks to your love, darkly in my body
lives the dense fragrance that rises from the earth.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where,
I love you simply, without problems or pride:
I love you in this way because I don't know any other way of loving

but this, in which there is no I or you,
so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand,
so intimate that when I fall asleep it is your eyes that close.

++
Love Sonnet XI

by Pablo Neruda

I crave your mouth, your voice, your hair.
Silent and starving, I prowl through the streets.
Bread does not nourish me, dawn disrupts me, all day
I hunt for the liquid measure of your steps.

I hunger for your sleek laugh,
your hands the color of a savage harvest,
hunger for the pale stones of your fingernails,
I want to eat your skin like a whole almond.

I want to eat the sunbeam flaring in your lovely body,
the sovereign nose of your arrogant face,
I want to eat the fleeting shade of your lashes,

And I pace around hungry, sniffing the twilight,
hunting for you, for your hot heart,
like a puma in the barrens of Quitratue.

++
Had I the heavens' embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths
Of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet:
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

W.B. Yeats, 1888

++
Neither the heart cut by a piece of glass
in a wasteland of thorns
nor the atrocious waters seen in the corners
of certain houses, waters like eyelids and eyes
can capture your waist in my hands
when my heart lifts its oaks
towards your unbreakable thread of snow.

Nocturnal sugar, spirit
of the crowns,
ransomed
human blood, your kisses
send into exile
and a stroke of water, with remnants of the sea,
neats on the silences that wait for you
surrounding the worn chairs, wearing out doors.

Nights with bright spindles,
divided, material, nothing
but voice, nothing but
naked every day.

Over your breasts of motionless current,
over your legs of firmness and water,
over the permanence and the pride
of your naked hair
I want to be, my love, now that the tears are
thrown
into the raucous baskets where they accumulate,
I want to be, my love, alone with a syllable
of mangled silver, alone with a tip
of your breast of snow.

Neruda

you are the one
my sweet atomic thing
as we dance around
atomic energy
from dissonance
a strung-out robot stare
oh, i'm not around
i grab the next train where
you are

and i saw you again last night
in a deep, deep REMlike sleep
oh and i could finally
i take your late night pain in the dream
and i stood at the hands
of a siren taunting me
she said back, just stay away,
she's my atomic thing

you kissed a shadow without blinking
the gold complexion of the sun
my arms expand to embrace the beauty of all your particles that culminate as one

and i can almost feel you
but you know science will have its way
so we must remain here just a-dancing apart, circling around our love,
my sweet atomic thing Leda Atomica, Mostly Bears

Knowing others is wisdom;
Knowing the self is enlightenment.
Mastering others requires force;
Mastering the self requires strength;
He who knows he has enough is rich.
Perseverance is a sign of will power.
He who stays where he is endures.
To die but not to perish is to be eternally present

Force begets force.
One whose needs are simple can fulfill them easily.
Material wealth does not enrich the spirit.
Self-absorption and self-importance are vain and self-destructive.
Envy is our calamity; overindulgence is our plight.
If you don't know then stop when you are done.

We put thirty spokes together and call it a wheel;
But it is on the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the wheel depends.
We turn clay to make a vessel;
But it is on the space where there is nothing that the usefulness of the vessel depends.
We pierce doors and windows to make a house;
And it is on these spaces where there is nothing that the usefulness of the house depends.
Therefore just as we take advantage of what is, we should recognize the usefulness of what is not. Tao Te Jing

"There is nothing more dangerous than a resourceful idiot."
"One way to compensate for a tiny brain is to pretend to be dead.” Scott Adams

平時不做虧心是
半夜不怕鬼敲門

If your heart is not guilty,
you will/need not fear ghosts.

Writing Exercises
Length of fingers
Jewelry, tattoos
How well tended the fingernails are, color, length, shape
Wrinkles
Stains, dirt
Prominence of knuckles
Coloration, smooth or splotchy
Prominence of veins
Moles, warts, rashes
Calluses, scars, blisters, scratches (and think about the causes)
How they’re held (tight, relaxed)
How they move
Whether the person need to use her hands to talk

Speed
Sound of their feet
Posture
Leaning forward or backward
Foot position: splayed, pigeon toed
Movement of arms
Movement of hips
Other parts of the body they’re unconsciously moving in rhythm with their walk

Do something with the following:
heart
glade
lament
pandemonium
honor
firefly
Can you get them all in a story, a paragraph, a sentence?

Use one of the following as a 10-15 minute writing prompt:
The protagonist is a musician. The antagonist is vampire chickens. The setting is an old theater. The goal is to find a lost relative. An important event will be finding an unexpected helper. An important object will be a compass.
The protagonist is a ghost hunter. The antagonist is gremlins. The setting is a large hotel. The goal is to travel in time. An important event will be a fire. An important object will be an invisibility device.
The protagonist is a zoo keeper. The antagonist is the Black Knight. The setting is a library. The goal is to sell a new invention. An important event will be a visit to a new store. An important object will be a deck of cards.
The protagonist is a painter. The antagonist is an angry mob. The setting is an amusement park. The goal is to be famous. An important event will be a trip to a hospital. An important object will be a magic ring.
The protagonist is a vampire. The antagonist is stuck up princess. The setting is a desert. The goal is to find peace. An important event will be getting a new pet. An important object will be a mandolin.
These were generated at Glen and Karen Bledsoe’s Random Writing Prompts page.
Feel free to mix and match or go to the website and generate new pieces for parts that don’t grab you.

http://dragonwritingprompts.blogsome.com/2006/02/

Conversation Starters
If I could...
I've never been...
I would never...
I always will...
I believe in...
I can't help...
I have to think about...
I may not be done...
I never thought...
I dream of...
My motto is...
My symbol could be...
The bane of my existence...
My ideal environment...
My epitaph...
The favorite part of my body...
I was once photographed...
My most embarrassing teenage moment...
I have too much of...
My most interesting moment at 3 AM...
Something I couldn't have...
If I had to give up...
When I lose...
The worst thing about me...
My mother would never...
Men...
Women...
Describe yourself in three words...
Everyone has a story about their hair. What's yours?
Who cares...
I knew pain when...
Peanut butter...
I remember
I don't remember
I have always
I see
I don't see
I have never
I know
I don't know
I want to
I wonder
I don't wonder
I don't want to
I hate
I love
I try to
I try not to

++

Characterization
Pick ten people you know and write a one-sentence description for each of them.

Take a passage from a book and rewrite the passage in a different style such as noir, gothic romance, pulp fiction or horror story.

First, pick a partner or have partners picked out of a hat.
One of you has five minutes to write the few paragraphs of a story. It can be about anything. You then pass it on to your writing partner who then writes the next paragraph for five minutes and so on and so on. If you both try to keep the two parts of the story consistent you can achieve interesting results. The story will either be completed or left open at the end of the meeting.

The timer will be set, and everyone will have 15 minutes to come up with a story.
Start out by taking a short clip from a newspaper. You’ll have 5 minutes.
Once the five minutes are up, everybody can get to writing and will have 15 minutes to expand the chosen article into a story.
It's surprising what you can come up when you know you have to get it done in 15 minutes! Even if you end up hating what you wrote, at least you're writing and who knows, it may develop into something else later on.

++

Clustering
Do you want to develop a character? It's a fun exercise to do even as a throw-away exercise.
In the middle of a blank piece of paper, write down your starting concept and circle it. Now, do a bunch of radiating lines from that center, and put concepts relating to your starting concepts. Circle each of those. From those circles, radiate even farther out and put more relating concepts. The "cluster" of connected ideas starting from a central concept is your finished product.
For example, I started once with "computer programmer" as my starting concept: I wanted to think about a character who was a computer programmer, because I know that world and could write about it.
The first layer had concepts like "wizard" and "relationship with computer" and "nerd" and "works long hours": each of these in a circle, connected to my central idea.
From "wizard" I got ideas like "algorithms as spells" and "mystic incantations" and "result appears like magic".
From "relationship with computer" I got "loves their computer" and "superuser" and "fast typer".
From "nerd" I got "sits too close to screen" and "wears sloppy jeans".
From "loves their computer" I radiated out even further and got "speaks to computer"
Now, the cluster doesn't really define an interesting character, its more of a stereotype. It's also a list of things to explore.
What can result in a really interesting character is negating one of the stereotypical ideas. For example, I negated the idea "loves their computer". That was a particularly rich choice, leading to questions about why the programmer would hate their computer, for how long they had hated it, and why they had become a computer programmer if they hated their computer. Perhaps the character hated their job but was afraid to leave it (the salary, the safety, the routine). Another cluster, done by a friend of mine, was about a dance teacher. The idea "supportive" was negated to lead to a vision of a dance teacher yelling at a row of dance students trying to do their best. That vision led to questions as well: why is the teacher so critical? Is the teacher bitter about something that happened?

++

A Sense of Taste
Write a short essay about the tastes you like and the tastes you don’t like. Taste is an interesting thing. Most people like sweet more than sour, but some people absolutely love sour candy. Beer is both bitter and sour, but people not only drink it, most people have a specific brand that they prefer and can tell you why. Take some time to think about your tastes in food and drink. What do you like that most other people do not? Do you eat a lot of different types of food, or do you only like a few different things? Do you like strong tastes or light tastes? Do you like the food you grew up with or have your tastes changed?

++

Writing Poetry
Write words down as they crop into your mind.
Give each word a color.
Give the senses a color.
Toss in words from foreign languages.
Go for sound.
Look at field guides for fancy scientific names, technical terms and such.

Make word tickets and place them around you, tape them to things and such.

Write your name in some way you’ve never written it before. Draw your name.
Notice three new things in someone’s face. Write down what you’ve seen.

Write a series of images without stopping. Make some of them absurd.
Give colors to ideas and abstractions.

Make a wordpool of feeling words, going for opposites.
Pick a painting, choose a feeling, look at a detail that seems to express that feeling, perhaps one color or a gesture of someone’s arm. Let your words paint the feeling.

Take an object and think about what it looks like. Describe exactly what you see.
I see a telephone.
It looks like a rude pointing finger.

Name the things you see around you, as if no one ever named them before.

My real name is
Yesterday my name was
Tomorrow my name will be
In my dream my name was
My husband, mother, son, boss (etc.) thinks my name is

Find a quiet place, sit down, shut your eyes and ask your shadow to appear.
Begin a conversation with your shadow. Describe him or her. Note changes in appearance as your conversation continues.
Ask your shadow what it needs from you to have a positive role in your world.
Where can you meet? What would your shadow like you to do together?
Make a date to meet with your shadow once a week or, if you prefer, every day at a certain time. Let your shadow pick the time and place.
Let your shadow write a poem.

List feeling words.
Pick a feeling. Use seven or eight word tickets to help you define your feeling. I feel as nervous as twelve eyelashes.
I feel as disturbed as
As peaceful as
Expectant as a fetal breath touched by daylight.
Enraged as the unheeded ant queen.
Jubilant as

Dear…
How could you
Why did you
Thank you for
Where were you,   etc.

Where have you felt most at home? Where do you think you really come from? “I come from….” (pg. 65)

Think of a favorite place. List details that make a place like poem to you. Use colors, sounds, smells, objects you remember seeing.
Name a place and begin you list. Shut your eyes. Go there. Let the words take you.

If I were a color, what color would I be?
What sound?
What animal?
What movement (glide, hop, wiggle, spin)?
What song?
What number?
What car?
What piece of furniture?
What food?
What musical instrument?
What place?
What element in nature (dust, galaxy, waterfall)?
What kind of a tree?
What shape (the shape of an airplane wing, a bootshape, a diamond)?
What’s something I’m afraid of?
What’s the word hiding behind my eyes?
I am…
I will be
I want to be
I used to be
I let go of
I’ve forgotten
I remember

List all the sides of yourself you can.
Choose the voices most wanting to speak, including opposites.
Knowing you’re the director behind the scenes, encourage these sides of you to go at it, no matter how dark or angry.
Describe what each part of you is wearing, what colors and where that part of you likes to go.
What does that part of you like to eat?
What car does he or she drive? Include details.
Use a variety of verbs: love hate ask need demand warn advise wear beg shriek sleep…
Fight, forgive, accuse, confess.
Just write it down.

Go out into nature somewhere. Let your writing be inspired by your inner coyote. Write words down. No sentences, no poems, just words. Let yourself make sounds as you write. Laugh at yourself. Let your writing leap. Take risks.

Write from the perspective of some other animal.
Spend an entire day without speaking.
Write a poem of hunger or food.
Stare at a fire. Let the heat and light fill your body. Write the fire’s poem. Toss some writing in the fire. Write about feeling the heat of your words burn. Notive the weather and write about it.
Feel something new.

++

Write about your need for a creative life. Why do you write? What needs are fulfilled through it? Call your essay "Why I Write." (There is an anthology by Will Blythe) Try to better understand your impulse to write. Use this understanding to explain to The Judge, and to all the enemies, why you must write, despite blocks or guilt or a hundred really cool other things to do.

The Most Creative Person I Have Ever Known.
Why do I feel she is so creative? Examples?

The Ideal Writing Space.
Things you want and love. Ladle on the details. Does it tell you anything about your writing goals and dreams? Does it say anything about your vision of what a writer is? Does it tell you anything about how you see yourself as a writer?

Write a scene that is set at night.
It should possess and element of intrigue or mystery. Write this scene at night. Push yourself to take risks with the language or the images or simply with the events in the scene. Allow the scene to end without resolution so that at least one more scene will be needed to provide some sort of closure. Write that scene in the morning. Put the scenes away fro a few days, then take them out and read them. do they connect? Do the actions and the tones match?

How You Write
Yield. Be open to what occurs spontaneously, don't try to force it. Just show up and do the best you can.
Trust your instincts. Breath gently. Don't think too much, don't feel too much or you will lose your balance. Remember the story. Put yourself in the story.
Practice your writing. Read good works. Build your vocabulary. Study the craft. Remain aware of the world around you. Keep your imagination fresh and fertile. The ideas will come and you'll recognize them.
Take risks. Audacity is the key to success for writers. When you find an idea push it to its limits. Explore all of its possibilities. Too often we decide what type of idea we want, knowing what will work for us. We reject other ideas before really digging around in them, especially if they demand that we go beyond where we normally go, in length, in depth, in emotional connection. An idea can seem "too crazy" or "impossible to pull off". Before abandoning a weak idea, take a risk. Up the stakes a bit. Surprise yourself. Risk embarrassment. When you hear yourself say, "I can't let anybody read this," or, "This is too weird," you've probably hit a vein worth mining a little deeper.
Sometimes you'll finish a piece and not like it. For some reason, it just doesn't shimmer. Perhaps the problem is it's too safe, too pat. Try to find the spark in the piece. Pull it out and pour some time into that place. if you widen your imaginative net, you'll catch more ideas. Risk audacity.

If you're writing a piece that you're trying to get published, you may have trouble getting started for fear of making a mistake or writing something that isn't good. Trying too hard can freeze your imagination. The words don't come to you. The writing is stiff and clumsy. The ideas don't make sense or hold together. you may grow so frustrated that you stop writing before you've had a chance to get started.
To move past those chilly moments, begin by writing on a less demanding piece. Try a prompt or two, or write a brief journal entry. Then, when the words begin to flow, switch to the piece you want to write. Reading a page or two of a writer you admire can be another method for warming up.

Warm up by writing at least three paragraphs in your journal. Write about the day's events or plans, ideas you've been thinking about, whatever. If your journal entries get carried away, set yourself to a one-page limit, then move to the novel.

Creativity Techniques
Freewriting. Don't worry about grammar or diction.
Brainstorming. Dig up everything you can get.
Automatic Writing. Free associate between words and images.
Listing.
Clustering. Start with a circle in the center then branch out.
Cavewriting. Mix words and pictures. You draw pictures of things related to th subject and writer words anywhere you want on the page. Draw whatever comes into your mind without giving it much thought.
Cut and paste. Take a story, yours or someone else's, then mix up pieces of the pages, and see what juxtapositions you find.
Mix and match. Find similarities between a column A and a column B.

Write down every idea you've ever had but didn't use in a piece of writing. Then choose ideas that still interest you. Write them on a new list of ideas for projects.

Spend a few minutes looking in the mirror. Just stare back at your reflection. then write a self-portrait, describing yourself in detail. Tyr to imagine that you’re looking at a stranger. What assumptions would you make from this person's appearance?

Brainstorm a list, beginning each entry with "I am a..."

Put together a cover letter to apply for your ideal job. Really sell yourself, detailing your professional skills and accomplishments. On a separate page, write your work history, listing jobs, places of employment, reasons why you left each job, how well you performed each job.

If you were a tree, what kind would you be? Etc.

Begin a story with the sentence "I __________." Push forward from there. If you can think of one action that speaks to who you are, what would it be? Write at least a few paragraphs. Try this experiment a few times, using different actions.

Keep a dream journal for at least a week, preferably longer. Write about a character who appears in one of your dreams, someone who lingers in your mind or has appeared in past dreams. Who is this character? What can you learn about yourself from him?

Do you have a five year plan? If not, take time and make one. Write down how you want your life to be in five years. When you finish, read what you've written and think about why you want to achieve these goals. What do the goals imply about your life as it is now? What do they suggest about you as a person?

Cast yourself five years into the future. You have achieved all the goals you wrote about in the previous prompt. In the persona of your-five-years-from-now, write a letter to the current you. Having achieved the goals, what advice would you impart to yourself? Explain how it feels to be living the life that you now hope to achieve.

You afflicted with a rare disease in which you can only tell the truth, the whole truth. Now introduce yourself to someone you don't know--on the page, of course. Explain to the stranger who you are. Go into detail. Tell your life story if you have to. The stranger is fictitious and will listen intently for hours.

Write an alternate story of your life by changing one key fact of history. You could make it realistic or concoct a crazy scenario, either way…both ways.

Create a comic strip based around your life, with you as the starring role, It’s called “Your Name.” Describe this character, the supporting characters, and the tone and focus of the comic strip. Would it offer a trenchant political commentary? The foibles and frolics of family life? Whimsical wit about single life? Daily life as viewed by a group of cats? You take it from here.

Transport yourself back to the you at twelve years of age. Close your eyes and try to put yourself into your own 12-year-old mind. Have that child prepare a list of questions for you—questions about life and what to expect, questions about love, questions seeking advice on the trials of a twelve-year-old. Now bring yourself back and respond to those questions. Explain why you’ve lived as you have, why you made the decisions you made and how you feel about those decisions. Try this experiment again, this time imagining yourself at seventy.

Write a list of your favorite things. Don’t stop at a few. Write a list of a lot of your favorite things—foods, activities, possessions, seasons, settings, whatever comes to mind.

Build a list of overrated people and things, popular favorites you feel receive unwarranted praise. As with the last activity, look for patterns in the list, trends that say something about you as the compiler.

Write about a favorite thing—maybe too much of a favorite thing, an addiction, even—focusing on the sounds…then on the smells…then on the tastes…and on the sense of touch.

Answer these in songs. You could choose...Or, you could just hit the shuffle button and randomly scan your playlist for each answer--see what you get. It's synchronicity. A clever, crafty way to convert your WMA player into a digitalized ouijah board.

1. Are you a male or a female: Nature Boy : Moulin Rouge Soundtrack / Everybody's Had the Blues : Merle Haggard / Dusty Miller : Alison Krauss / Sexecutioner : GWAR / Sweet Rosalyn : Sheryl Crow / Eleanor Rigby-Julia : The Beatles (remix)

2. How do some people feel about you: Even Though : Sugar Ray / Knife Prty : Deftones / Breakdown : Jack Johnson / Mian (Sleep) : Silver Ash / One Chance : Modest Mouse / Flowers On the Wall : The Statler Bros

3. How do you feel about yourself: Put Your Head On My Shoulder : Paul Anka / Smooth : Rob Thomas & Santana* / Monolith : Mudvayne / Zamba Malado : Susana Baca / Behind the Sun : The Good, the Bad, and the Queen / Someday You Will Be Loved : Death Cab for Cutie

4. Describe your family: Sleep On : Alison Krauss / Stand By Me : B.E. King / Oasis : Gackt / One Headlight : The Wallflowers / Sleeping Lessons : The Shins / Yankee Bayounet : The Decemberists

5. Where would you rather be: Born on the Bayou : CCR / Bitchin' Camaro : The Dead Milkmen / Too Late To Cry : Alison Krauss / Transatlanticism : Death Cab for Cutie / I'm Only Sleeping : The Beatles / The Reason : Hoobastank

6. Describe what you want to be: The Wind Cries Mary : Jimi Hendrix / Silent Jealousy : X Japan / Going Where the Lonely Go : Alan Jackson / When You Were Young : Killers / Abracadabra : Sugar Ray / Tiny Cities Made of Ashes : Modest Mouse

7. Describe how you live: Tank! : Cowboy Bebop Soundtrack / Tainted Love : Marilyn Manson / You & Me : Neil Young / Beside You In Time : NIN / In Bloom : Nirvana

8. Describe how you love: Goodbye Yellow Brick Road : Elton John / Sweetness : Jimmy Eat World / Severed : Mudvayne / Might : Modest Mouse / Tomorrow : The Communards / It's You Again : Appalachian Drive / You're the Good Things : Modest Mouse

9. Describe what you hate: Ruiner : NIN / Blurry : Puddle of Mudd / I Do Not Want This : NIN / Edit the Sad Parts : Modest Mouse / Made for TV Movie : Incubus / Proud Mary : CCR

*"Where did you park? Do you need a ride to your car?"
"No, I'm good. I like the fresh air."
"Come on, you just like to count the honks you get on the walk over. Notch them off on your counting stick. Six today? You're a little disappointed."
"At least seven so far, actually."

I think it was the tao that drew us a part.
And yet, that is ironic, considering the focus with which we have sought it within life, sought to embody it...
and yet here we are, not rejecting each other, but not so tied to one another as we once were.
The attachment hangs like a ghost, were we to cut the cords of the past, we would soon slip away from each other, like two ships disconnected in a storm.

Yet I will always love you.

Mostly excerpts from 365 Tao Daily Meditations by Deng Ming-Dao

"Before emptying there must be fullness
Before shrinking there must be expanding
Before falling, there must be ascent.
To destroy something, lead to its extreme.
To preserve something, keep to the middle."

Entry for Stephen's birthday:
Sun in heaven.
Abundance in great measure.
Supreme success
In the midst of impermanence.

"Those on land never understand maritime life.
Those of the sea are intimate with your moods;
They navigate but are ultimately helpless.
Destinations become useless, drifting in the sole reality:
A sailor's fears dissolve into acceptance."

A solitary crane
In winter snow
Needs no jewels

The mind that turns outward
Will have no end to craving.
Only the mind turned inward
Will find a still-point of peace.

Fire feeding on fire.

No matter what is achieved in joining with others, it is wise to remember that we each walk this path independently. The ultimate truth of the journey and its final rewards are still for each of us to face alone.

Chill morning, stone steps.
The path to the temple is steep.
We may stumble at times,
But we must always get up again.

We speak and write to
Explain to ourselves.

All that we experience is subjective.
There is no sensation without interpretation.
We create the world and ourselves;
Only when we stop do we see the truth.

Cling to Tao like a shadow.
Move without a shadow.

The more you dwell in the spirit,
The farther you are from common ways.
If you want to speak of Tao's wonders,
Few will listen.

The tao requires strength and endurance. If you can avoid being discouraged by poverty, isolation, and obscurity, you will find an unshakable devotion that will last your entire life, and rewards will come in slow and subtle ways. There is a secret source of sustenance. Once you taste that, all your doubts will fade, and both poverty and loneliness will be easier to bear.

Problems cannot be
Resolved at once.
Slowly untie knots
Divide to conquer.

A tree hemmed in by giants
Requires tenacity to survive.

I hold some level of respect for anyone who stands up to me. And respect is equatable with at least some sort of love, esteem, admiration.
Probably why I have such compassion even for assholes, if they have the courage to stand up to my antagonism...frankly, I am kind of a bully. Anyone who calls me on my crap...that's admirable.

The world is dazzling,
I alone am dull.
Others strive for achievement,
I follow a lonely path.

Followers of the Tao are nonconformists. The conventional label our behavior erratic, antisocial, irresponsible, inexplicable, outrageous, and sometimes scandalous. We hear other voices, respond to inner urgings. We have no interest in the social norm; we only care about following the Tao. It does not matter if no one can understand us.
We have so many voices, personalities, ambitions, and tendencies within ourselves. The ability to distinguish between them,

Was that Albert on the phone just now?
Yes, he told me to go quiet into myself...
Hahahahaha
I told him, you should have stayed in your country, old man!
Oh shit. That's awesome.

Your mother. Your mimsy.

Who is this who keeps texting me?
You should pretend you're gay!
I don't know how to do that.
I do! Here! Let me do it for you!!
How do you text with a lisp?
Just add a th to everything, dude.
As in, hey guyth, whath goin' on?!?!

I hate this bag. This bag says Wave. It says I shop there, and I'm a bitch.
That's your bitch bag.
And all I wanted was a pair of socks, dude.

...and the ability to silence all the voices save for Tao's, is imperative if one is to reach this state of being. Once one is in touch with the true Tao, there are no doubts, and the murmuring of others cannot have any effect. One is as comforted as a child at its mother's breast.
Mimsy's breast...

Even on the road to hell, flowers can make you smile.
They are fragile, ephemeral, uncompromising. No one can alter their nature. True, you can easily destroy them, but you will not gain anything; you cannot force them to submit to your will.

Life itself is fleeting. We should take time to appreciate beauty in the midst of temporality.

We make life real by the thoughts we project.

Death is the opposite of time.
What dies is only our human meaning. There is still someone naked underneath. Once we understand who that someone is, death no longer bothers us. Nor does time.

Life is
Beauty,
Terror,
Knowledge.
Self-cultivation to make us a fit vehicle for the pursuit of knowledge. With learning, we glimpse life as it really is, and that is difficult to bear. There is an underbelly of terror to all life. It is suffering it is hurt. Deep within all of us are intense fears that have left few of us whole. Life's terrors haunt us, attack us, leave ugly cuts. To buffer ourselves, we dwell on beauty, we collect things, we fall in love, we desperately try to make something lasting in our lives. We take beauty as the only worthwhile thing in existence, but it cannot veil cursing, violence, randomness and injustice.
Only knowledge removes this fear. If e were shown the whole truth, we could not stand it. But lovely and horrible details make us human, and when knowledge threatens to show us our follies, we may realize that we are not yet ready to leave them behind. Then the veil closes again and we sit meditating before it, trying to prepare ourselves for the moment when we dare to part the curtain completely.

Heaven and hell:
Our subconscious.

Worry is an addiction
That interferes with compassion.

Demons who enter your circle
Must be pushed out.

Too many layers of meaning have been imposed upon sex. Religions straightjacket it, ascetics deny it, romantics glorify it, intellectuals theorized about it, obsessives pervert it. These actions have nothing to do with lovemaking. Sex should not be used as leverage, manipulation, selfishness or abuse. It should not be a ground for our personal compulsions and delusions. It is an honest reflection of our innermost personalities,m and we should ensure that its expression is healthy. Making love is something mysterious, sacred, and often the most profound interaction between people. Whether what is created is a relationship or pregnancy, the legacy of both partners will be inherent in their creation. What we put into love determines what we get out of it.

Markings in dry clay disappear
Only when the clay is soft again.

A father without a father
Has difficulty balancing.
A master without a master
Is dangerous.

City on a hill,
Untouched land beyond.
A fallow field is
The secret of fertility.

We communicate through gross symbols.
We call them 'objective'
But we cannot escape our point of view.

We pray to them,
But do they answer?

Let us not follow vulgar leaders
Who exploit the fear of death,
And promise the bliss of salvation.
If we are truly happy,
They will have nothing to offer.

There is no language of the holy.
The sacred lies in the ordinary.

Why do you scorn others?
Can it be that you are that proud?
No matter how accomplished you are,
There are people ahead of you and behind you.
All beings on the path,
All victims of the same existence,
All with body, mind, and spirit.
No one is better than the next person.
Help others for all the times that you have been ignored.
Be kind to others for all the times that you have been scorned.
(this may be hypocrisy........but those who say one thing and do another--maybe they advise you with advice they do no follow in hopes that you might do better than them. it's weak, but if the effort is behind it...)

Yoda says, do or do not, there is no try.
Perhaps that is the case, even still.

But what do you do--help others who are hurting others in hopes they might learn? Then they do not. But treat them all the same, nevertheless...that's one way of doing things.
I'm still not sure if I believe in that.

Invisibility is the best advantage.
But if forced to a confrontation, Come out with all your skill.

One side is cool (as the other side of the pillow) and foggy,
the other is hot and dry.
Just by choosing where you stand,
You alter your destiny.

Some look fierce, but are mile.
Some seem timid, but are vicious.
Look beyond appearances;
Position yourself for the advantage.

Don't let a thread fall without noticing it.
Don't rake dry brown leaves carelessly.
Think how difficult it was
For something to take this existence.

Knowledge is more than possessing information.

The clearer the goal, the greater the result.

Don't go out looking for good deeds to do,
But if one comes your way, do not refuse.
If you meet someone who is suffering,
You must help them.

Firmness, consistency, and patience are essential in raising a child There will undoubtedly be times when you have to correct a child to prevent mistakes and bad habits. However, when it comes to a child's curiosity, individuality, or initiative, there should never be any discouragement. In that sense, it is wrong to say no.

Imagine a sculpture
You work on everyday.
If you stop, the beauty
Will slowly go away.

Where is his heart? Where is his soul?
To call this heaven's will
Is a cheap answer.

Gods have many faces,
But true divinity has no face.

Flesh, blood, bone.
Were you gone? Or were you never here in the first place?
Where is the torrent?
It is not gone;
You've only closed to it once more.

Those who consider their path superior are condescending.
A parrot who speaks of the totality of the self is absurd.
Many paths lead to the summit,
But it takes a whole body to get there.

Emperors uphold censorship,
But extreme repression leads to extreme reaction.
Individualists believe in freedom.
But extreme expression leads to extreme reaction.

Deception occurs when you are divided.

As long as the sun rises
And your heart beats,
Tao is at hand.

There are three levels of truth:
Experience, reasoning, and knowing.
All other assertions should be rejected.

She withdrew into herself,
First writing just for one,
Then touching thousands.
She incarnated ghosts, hurt, and joy
Into paper-and-ink stories of wonder.
(yea, rock on, let's do that!
This is the entry for my birthday!! Hell yeah!)

Outside is form,
Inside is thought.
Deepest is the soul.

Uphold precepts, but be merciful.
Gradually absorb, until there is no need for law.
Gain wisdom beyond right and wrong.

How long will it take to see Tao?
Until you no longer hold self-importance.

Animals live simple lives close to Tao. They do not need to think or reason: They never doubt themselves. When they are hungry, they eat. When they are tired, they sleep. They respond to the cycles of the day according to their intuition. They mate at the proper season, and they nurture their young according to their own understanding. When they die, they fall under the the teeth of predators or the dispassionate turning of the seasons.
By contrast, we a human beings depart from the natural norm, and worry about ethical action. The follower of Tao prefers to live completely in concert with Tao, avoiding the interference of theory and excessive thought. Though one must first learn skill ad ethics thoroughly, one must come to embody them so completely that they become subconscious. One must intuitively do what is correct. There should be no foreshadowing of act, nor doubt about oneself.

Wall of flames, bridge of tears.
Snowflake on newly forged links.
For a marriage to last, a couple must go through great travails and hardships. It is like a process of forging steel links together. The iron must be heated to a high degree and then plunged into cold water. A marriage alternates between the heat of passion and love and the chilling times of tragedy, conflict, and adversity. An enduring marriage becomes like tempered steel.
We all need support and the sense of belonging that comes from working toward goals shared with another. For such a relationship to work, there must be basic compatibility of values, outlook, and purpose. It is an inadequate cliche that husband and wife must be friends as well as lovers. Two mates can know a loyalty found in no other kind of relationship.
Ultimately, all relationships are temporary. False attachment to another can become an addiction, a voluntary bondage detrimental to clear perception. We should not bind another to ourselves, should not define ourselves by our marriage, should not force another to stay with us. But if chance allows us to walk together, who is anyone to challenge our choice of walking companions?
When it is time to part, then it is time to part. There should be no regrets. The beauty of marriage is like the fleeting perfection of a snowflake.

A warrior takes every person as an adversary.
He sees all their vulnerable points,
And trains to eliminate his own.
A sage has no vulnerable points.

A warrior takes everyone as a potential adversary. He assesses each person that he meets for their strengths and weaknesses, and he places himself strategically. No confrontation is ever a surprise. Protection, competition, honor, and righteousness are his principles.
He is the weapon. Therefore, a warrior trains his body and mind to perfection. He knows that the average person has hundreds of point where death can enter. For himself, he seeks to eliminate as many of his own vulnerabilities as possible.
The sage knows that nothing dies, that life is mere illusion: Life is but one dream following another.

Every god can be defied.
No choice, no devotion.

Use a mirror in difficult times:
You will see both cause and resolution.

Accomplish your visions.
Persevere in your ambitions.
Only then can you negate
Visions and ambitions.

Put forth your effort
With no thought of gain.

We part at the crossroads,
You leave with your joys and problems,
I with mine. Alone, I look down the road.
Each one must walk one's own path.

If you have practiced for the day, then you have won.
If you were lazy for the day, then you have lost.

You could labor ten years under a master
Trying to discern whether the teachings are true.
But all you might learn is this:
One must live one's own life.

They say, "You are god."
But everyone is.
They say, "All is god."
Then why are their differences?
They say, "All is an illusion."
But does that include god?

When parents demand without understanding, they thwart development. Before parents blame their children, they should look first at how their daughters and sons were raised.

Even in sleep, write a poem.
When waking, write a poem.
While loving, write a poem.
Even voting, write a poem.
When angry, write a poem.
While dreaming, write a poem.

For a true master,
Sitting on a throne
Is no different than
Sitting on dirt.

Build your life brick upon brick.
Live a life of truth,
And you will look back on a life of truth.
Live a life of fantasy,
And you will look back on delusion.

Don't call me a follower of Tao.

Reject labels.
Reject identities.
Reject conformity.
Reject convention.
Reject definitions.
Reject names.

Choose your friends and situations carefully, for they will influence you.

Money is never more important than your body and mind, but you must work and support yourself. Never depend on others for your livelihood.

You sell what you need when you buy what you do not.

Never compromise your dignity for any reason.

Every day, you must make decisions. Everything you do will have irrevocable effects upon your life. Before you go down any path, consider carefully. Rivers very rarely reverse course.

Which came first? Experience or meaning?

Sex, coffee, liquor, and cigarettes
Are the totems of today.
Stimulation has replaced feeling.
Do you want intimacy? Have sex.
Do you want to be energetic? Drink coffee.
Do you want freedom from inhibitions? Drink wine.
Do you want a fashionable prop? Smoke cigarettes.
People have lost the knowledge of how to do these things without artificial stimulation. Energy through good health? Intimacy through sensitivity?

Seek silence.
Gladden in silence.
Adore silence.

Give back what you've learned.
Share your experience.

You hurt me years ago;
My wounds bled for yeas.
Now you are back,
But I am not the same.

Immortality does not beget wisdom.
Only mortality begets maturity.

How can divination
Exceed imagination?

Crawl to begin.
Triumph to complete.
Renounce to leave.

You may be capable of great things,
But life consists of small things.

Those truly linked don't need correspondence.
When they meet again after many years apart,
Their friendship is as true as ever.

Is your life a joyous song?

Though life is a dream,
Act as if it isn't.
Act with no weight.

Strangely colorless,
Yet intense.
It grips like a tidal wave.

Passion is but a prelude to
Years of gradual unfolding.

Don't be destroyed by knowledge and power,
Use common sense to survive.

Measure twice, cut once.

No matter how old you are,
You mustn't stop growing.

Why yearn for a promised land?
The true land is in the heart.

Life acquires meaning
When we face the conflict
Between our desires
And reality.

Hide what you know.
Conceal talent.
Shield your light.
Bide your time.
Privately accumulate extraordinary knowledge and skill, but keep a plain appearance.
Mastery should not be used to bolster image. We should not allow ourselves to be categorized by what we know. It is far better to simplify ourselves and free ourselves from the limits of tightly defined identities.

Damnation is in you. So too is salvation. You are the prince of darkness. You are also the prince of light. Neither can be cast out of yourself. The valiant coping with that dichotomy is the poignancy of this existence.

Banish uncertainty.
Affirm strength.
Hold resolve.
Expect death.

Though others have faults,
Concentrate on your own.

Express yourself:
That is meaning.

What we do only has meaning in the here and now. It will not remain in the next instant. Just do what you can for the present, and leave everything else to happen naturally. Work. Wash. Meditate. Eat. Study. Urinate. Sleep. Exercise. Talk. Listen. Touch. Die each night. Be born again each morning.
++++++++++
For Vero: Threshold. 220.
For Jean Claude Van Dam: Abundance. 214.
For X: Vitality. 251.
For Live: Stress. 235 hahahaha

Religion lays out clear definitions of good and evil, distinguishing good deeds--"solids" in Biblical Hebrew--from sins. Think about it: Without this guidance and reward/punishment system, how would we know that it's actually GOOD to give charity to beggars? Pus, without the concept of Right and Wrong, we'd have no cowboy movies or cop shows because there'd be no good good buys & bad guys--just guys.
And forget about kareoke. I mean, "(If Loving You Is Wrong) I Don't Want to Be Right" is my go-to crowd pleaser, but who wants to here "(If Loving You Is Okay) Then, Okay"?
I Am America & So Can You, Stephen Colbert

what have i become, my sweetest friend?
everyone i know
goes away
in the end

and you can have it all
my empire of dirt
i will let you down
i will make you hurt

i where this crown of shit
upon my liar's chair
full of broken thoughts
i cannot repair
the needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but i remember everything

what have i become, my sweetest friend?
everyone i know
goes away
in the end

and you can have it all
my empire of dirt
i will let you down
i will make you hurt

if i could start again
a million miles away
i would keep you
i would find a way

(nin)

a lot of you don’t see it, but people like her teach the weak minded to believe in a material existence as the route to happiness. I guarantee you she has big problems because of the life she leads, but you won’t hear about it, because the entertainment industry needs you to believe that it’s all shiny happy people having major fun.

in a few years when her face is tired and the music dries up, watch the industry turn on her, gossip columns - the usual stuff. then she’s gone and you lot forget about her for the next plastic fake smile that sells you another false dream

of course you won’t accept this, because they have you like a hypnotist. --anonymous comment on paris hilton in response to http://gossip.elliottback.com/2006/07/10/paris-hiltons-album-cover/

<3 banksy

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. “ Ghandi

(still workin' on that one...)

Questions I
Favorite color
Lucky number
Favorite flower
Favorite author
Favorite book (fiction)
Favorite book (non-fiction)
Favorite faerie tale
Favorite children's book
Favorite "Disney animated classic"
Favorite Bible passage
Favorite saying
Favorite proverb
Favorite poem
Favorite poet
Favorite song
Favorite singer
Favorite musical band
Favorite kind of music
Favorite dance tune
Favorite romantic song
Favorite slow dance tune
Favorite rock 'n roll song
Favorite ballad
Favorite country song
Favorite gospel song
Favorite jazz number
Favorite R&B tune
Favorite song writer
Favorite magazine
Favorite meal
Favorite food
Favorite vegetable
Favorite fruit
Favorite cookie
Favorite kind of ice cream
Favorite kind of chocolate
Favorite snack food
Favorite restaurant (expensive)
Favorite restaurant (frugal)
Favorite fast food joint
Favorite TV show (current)
Favorite TV show (old)
Favorite comedian
Favorite actor (living)
Favorite actor (of any era)
Favorite actress (living)
Favorite actress (of any era)
Favorite adventure movie
Favorite erotic movie
Favorite romantic comedy
Favorite comedy film
Favorite action movie
Favorite Broadway play
Favorite musical
Favorite show tune
Favorite breed of dog
Favorite breed of cat
Favorite animal
Favorite comic strip
Favorite comic book
Favorite comic character
Favorite TV cartoon
Favorite TV cartoon character
Favorite artist
Favorite style of artwork
Favorite painting
Favorite sculpture
Favorite hero/heroine
Role model (real life)
Role model (fictional)
Favorite athlete
Favorite sport (to watch)
Favorite sport (to play)
Favorite Olympic sport
Favorite sports team
Favorite foreplay activity (to receive)
Favorite foreplay activity (to perform)
Favorite lovemaking position
Favorite sexy outfit (for partner)
Favorite erotic fantasy
Favorite time of day to make love
Favorite music to make love to
Favorite season
Favorite time of day
Favorite holiday
Favorite hobby
Preferred jewelry metal (silver, gold, copper, platinum, etc.)
Favorite style of clothing (for self)
Favorite style of clothing (for partner)
Favorite designer
Favorite erotic clothing (for self)
Favorite erotic clothing (for partner)
Dream vacation spot
Favorite city
Favorite foreign country
Favorite wine
Favorite champagne
Favorite beer
Favorite soft drink
Favorite way to spend a lazy afternoon
Favorite room in your home
Favorite perfume
Favorite cologne
Favorite brand of make-up
Favorite aroma
Favorite fictional character
Favorite historical personality
Best gift ever received
Favorite way to relax
Favorite way to get energized
Favorite store
Favorite side of the bed
Favorite TV sitcom
Favorite TV drama
Favorite joke
Favorite gemstone
Favorite day of the week
Favorite month of the year
Favorite classical composer
Favorite symphony
Favorite opera
Favorite album/CD
Favorite car (make & year)
Favorite color for car

Questions II
What is your name?

Do you have any nicknames?

What's your hair color?

What's your eye color?

Do you have any piercings?

Do you have any tattoos?

What's your ethnicity?

What's your heritage?

Do you have any siblings?

...FavOritEs...

Food?

Candy?

Icecream?

Drink?

Color?

Number?

Season?

School Subject?

Store?

Clothing Brand?

Sport?

Male Celebrity?

Female Celebrity?

Holiday?

Book?

TV Show?

Movie?

Childhood Toy?

< This or That >

Kisses or Hugs?

Laugh or Cry?

City or Country?

Chocolate or Vanilla?

NYC or LA?

Coke or Pepsi?

Up North or Down South?

Beach or Pool?

Hot or Cold?

Sunny or Rainy?

Shake Ya Tailfeather or Shake Your Laffy Taffy?

Polka Dots or Stripes?

Baskin Robbins or Dairy Queen?

Twist or Shout?

Family or Friends?

Boys or Girls?

McDonalds or Burger King?

Chocolate Milk or White Milk?

Love or Money?

Fantasy or Reality?

Abercrombie or Hollister?

Hamburgers or Hotdogs?

Ketchup or Mustard?

Day or Night?

Rap or Country?

Prep or Emo?

Sweet or Tart?

Blonde or Brunette?

Cats or Dogs?

Indoors or Outdoors?

<3 L.O.V.E <3

Have you ever been in love?

With whom?

What is true love?

Does love at first sight exist?

Do you have a bf or gf?

What is your sexual orientation?

Is there such a thing as fairytales?

Have you ever been cheated on?

Have you ever cheated?

Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?

Do you have a crush?

On who?

Are you a virgin?

How far have you gone?

Ever hooked up with someone of the same sex?

Do you want to get married?

Do you want to have kids?

How do you feel about "friends with benefits"?

Would you ever consider having an open relationship with someone?

:::In a Boy / Girl:::
Hair Color?

Eye Color?

Height?

Most Important Personality Trait?

Looks or Personality?

?Random Questions?

Do you think you're attractive?

Do you do drugs?

Smoke?

Drink?

Are you friends with people who do?

If you could meet any athlete, who would it be?

Do you like coffee?

What do you want to be when you grow up?

How many times a day do you brush your teeth?

Have you ever had braces?

Do you wear contacts or glasses?

Does God exist?

What is your religion?

What is your clothing style?

Do you believe in life on other planets?

Do you wish on stars?

Are you pro-life?

Do you support the death penalty?

Do you support gay marriage?

How do you want to die?

Do you have any regrets?

Does karma come back and get you?

Have you ever been sent to jail?

Have you ever lied?

Are you honest?

When is your bedtime?

Have you ever cheated on homework?

How late do you sleep until?

Are you vegetarian?

Do you have a job?

Are you rich?

Who is the funniest comedian?

Is your hair naturally curly or straight?

Do you go to tanning beds?

What is your natural hair color?

Do you dye your hair?

Do you get along with your parents?

What is your most prized possession?

What thing do you have an obsession for?

How many shoes do you own?

Are you usually a happy person?

If you had to name the most important ingredient of human beauty, what would you say it is?
Love.

If you had to name the one thing that repeatedly makes you the angriest, what would it be?

C'est l'Ennui! —l'œil chargé d'un pleur involontaire,
Il rêve d'échafauds en fumant son houka.
Tu le connais, lecteur, ce monstre délicat,
—Hypocrite lecteur,—mon semblable,—mon frère!

It's Ennui (great depressive suicidal boredom)! — his eye brimming with spontaneous tear
He dreams of the gallows in the haze of his hookah.
You know him, reader, this delicate monster,
Hypocritical reader, my likeness, my brother! Baudelaire, Les Fleurs du mal

In 2007, an estimated 33.2 million people lived with the AIDs worldwide; it killed an estimated 2.1 million people, including 330,000 children. The Black Death is lying dormant with airborn strains resurging in some third world countries. CCP moves in on Tibet and systematically eliminated their language, social customs, religious customs, jobs, natural resources, forced their beloved Dalai Lama into exile, killed over a million of their citizens--nonmilitant civilians and pacifist monks-- and destroyed over 6000 monasteries. China directs its ire especially at the Falun Gong, Christians, Tibetans, Buddhists, and minorities. But it is Falun Gong that receives special attention. Those of Falun Gong who self-identified were treated viciously after the famous Tianamen Square protests. Once arrested, they were tortured and taken to their home districts where their family members and co-workers were also singled out for having been exposed to the Falun Gong contagion. Patients receiving harvested organs such as livers and kidneys come from China and abroad. They are told to report to surgery just scant hours before going under the knife. Often conducted at night, surgeons and attending nurses remain anonymous while patients are not allowed to see any documentation that the organs received are from volunteers. In the cold calculation of China’s ever more prosperous communist masters, the transaction of organs harvested from prisoners (presumably having had the organs removed while they were still alive) is an merely an efficient and profitable use of a human resource that would otherwise go to waste. There is little evidence left of these crimes. The bodies of victims are cremated and no word is given to loved ones of their disposal. The operating rooms where the murders and transplants occur look like any others. Thousands of women over the last century forced into prostitution and their daughters will be, too, for lack of birth control awareness or provisions, in Calcutta's red light district. And Charles Baudelaire is bored.

The beautiful words of one so pitifully self-pitying of the fact that he has much too much time on his delicate hands.
But what lovely prose, even still.
I'd like to slap him for his ingratitude toward life and God.
What indolent wretched pathetic spoiled bastard can complain of boredom with life? Someone paleskinned who has never seen the sunlight, someone soft-handed who has never soiled his palms with the earth and hard work under the sun, someone so vain and arrogant to suppose that they should not, someone worthless to the world who may as well just die if they won't find something, somewhere to devote themselves to, to give their heart and soul to, be it logic or passion, either one, something to consume and/or be consumed by...anyone who complains of boredom with life has obviously never lost anyone very close to them prematurely, or violently. And those who have must ask themselves why did they take mine and leave this disgusting miserable waste of breath to walk the earth? Tell me, what right does he have to live that others who loved and made use of every breath of life had to go sooner? I suppose that God wanted to keep them much closer.
And I suppose it is possible that those who have suffered so greatly that they were forced to shut out the world entirely and cauterize their hearts, withdraw into the safer chamber of their minds where the only sound they can hear in the dark and cold stillness is the sound of their own screaming, that's understandable. But what is with this useless goth subculture of pro-death children who have never known any true level of suffering in their confined suburban lives with the exception of apparently limitless boredom? Is that the greatest plague of the upper-middle-class society? Someone forgot the whipped cream on their double-shot mocha latte? Is that really the driving factor of sociopathology? No wonder it's so prevalent in our noble cultured society.
So go ahead and ask why I feel this rage, sometimes, and the level of violence that rattles around bashing its head against my ribs while calmly I sip tea and dillute it with rationality that will never, ever settle for tranquility.

POEMS BY EE CUMMINGS
+++
i love you much(most beautiful darling)
i love you much(most beautiful darling)

more than anyone on the earth and i
like you better than everything in the sky

-sunlight and singing welcome your coming

although winter may be everywhere
with such a silence and such a darkness
noone can quite begin to guess

(except my life)the true time of year-

and if what calls itself a world should have
the luck to hear such singing(or glimpse such
sunlight as will leap higher than high
through gayer than gayest someone's heart at your each

nearness)everyone certainly would(my
most beautiful darling)believe in nothing but love

+++

may i feel said he
  may i feel said he
  (i'll squeal said she
  just once said he)
  it's fun said she


  (may i touch said he
  how much said she
  a lot said he)
  why not said she


  (let's go said he
  not too far said she
  what's too far said he
  where you are said she)


  may i stay said he
  (which way said she
  like this said he
  if you kiss said she


  may i move said he
  is it love said she)
  if you're willing said he
  (but you're killing said she


  but it's life said he
  but your wife said she
  now said he)
  ow said she


  (tiptop said he
  don't stop said she
  oh no said he)
  go slow said she


  (cccome?said he
  ummm said she)
  you're divine!said he
  (you are Mine said she)

Z+++

the boys i mean are not refined
  the boys i mean are not refined
  they go with girls who buck and bite
  they do not give a fuck for luck
  they hump them thirteen times a night

  one hangs a hat upon her tit
  one carves a cross on her behind
  they do not give a shit for wit
  the boys i mean are not refined

  they come with girls who bite and buck
  who cannot read and cannot write
  who laugh like they would fall apart
  and masturbate with dynamite

  the boys i mean are not refined
  they cannot chat of that and this
  they do not give a fart for art
  they kill like you would take a piss

  they speak whatever's on their mind
  they do whatever's in their pants
  the boys i mean are not refined
  they shake the mountains when they dance

+++

somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond
any experience,your eyes have their silence:
in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,
or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look easily will unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skilfully,mysteriously) her first rose

or if your wish be to close me,i and
my life will shut very beautifully, suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility: whose texture
compels me with the color of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens; only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody,not even the rain, has such small hands

+++

 kumrads die because they're told)
kumrads die before they're old
(kumrads aren't afraid to die
kumrads don't
and kumrads won't
believe in life)and death knows whie

(all good kumrads you can tell
by their altruistic smell
moscow pipes good kumrads dance)
kumrads enjoy
s.freud knows whoy
the hope that you may mess your pance

every kumrad is a bit
of quite unmitigated hate
(travelling in a futile groove
god knows why)
and so do i
(because they are afraid to love 

To Helena Concerning Dan Chiasson

The water at the bottom of the river, way down, the coldest
darkest water: if that water were your only drinking water
what would you do: thirst forever? Or drink the freezing water?

If A, send me a postcard from la-la land, where
Mom bays like a donkey and Dad is an oil slick,
because that's where dehydration takes you, fast.

If B, I'd buy the biggest wool parka I could find
and put it where the sun don't shine—otherwise
you'll feel a subzero chill no mug of tea will thaw.

I chose B, and now it's winter, and I'm outside your door
like a baby seal on an ice island, waiting
to be clubbed or saved by a Green New Zealander.

Come out. When Dan beats off again, when
he drifts away the way he always does, come out:
zip up that pantsuit and rescue me from my Horatian

sense of humor! There's a great jazz bar nearby
that doesn't charge a cover. They will play
only the nine jazz songs we know, over and over.

And the world will narrow the way it always does
when we're together, only nine jazz songs
ever written, and we know every one by heart.

And if some kid from the local jazz college walks in
and starts playing the tenth song, that's when
we get our clubs and club him like a baby seal

--Dan Chiasson

"You're not ugly, but if you were smarter, you'd be hot." (Man attempting pickup, overheard by bartender.)

“She cooked it. I ate it. That was forty years ago.”

"If only I was 20 years younger and lesbian." (Woman speaking about her yoga teacher, overheard by Elaine Geffen.)

"I'm not going there to get laid, but I might have to leave early to avoid it." (Self-assured young man to friend, overheard near the UC Berkeley campus by Marilyn Pon.)

"I don't see us being a girlfriend-boyfriend thing. I mean, we could be, but it's so obvious to me we won't that I felt I should mention it." (Boy to girl, overheard at Jupiter in Berkeley by Dave Bourdon.)

"I'm glad you asked. Yes, I was once charged with attempted murder." (Couple on what seemed to be first date, overheard at NOPA by B. Stormont.)

"So I told him, 'If she's standing close enough to kiss her it means she wants you to.' " (Man to friend, overheard at Pasta Pomodoro on 24th Street by Gerald Nachman.)

"The price I pay for what I did to you is having the traumatic memories of sex with you seared into my brain."

"Barack Obama. We've made it our new safe word." (Woman to woman, overheard at the bar at Cafe Rouge by Desmond Yen.)

(excerpts from the book "Real Life Romance")

What is your name? I'll never tell.

Do you have any nicknames? Penguine. Mockingbird. Why birds? I don't know.

What's your hair color? stripy.

What's your eye color? green.

Do you have any piercings? took them out. blocked my chi flow.

Do you have any tatoos? a few.

What's your ethnicity? a little bit of everyone racially associated with alcohol. kikapoo is my favorite. i am proud to be a kikapoo. and i'm proud to be black irish.

What's your heritage? farmers. beatnics.

Do you have any siblings? somewhat.

...FavOritEs...

Food? i will probably enjoy anything that isn't rotten, moldy, lactose, or poisoned.

Candy? black licorice.

Icecream? rocky road.

Drink? water. unsweetened tea. 3 shots of espresso. redeye. cranberry juice (it's not about pms, it's just the most delicious juice around). bottle o' vodka. very black coffee (peruvian preferably). orange juice with vodka. bottle o' grapefruit gin, with saladitos, good with a joint and a lover. orange juice with rum, good for writing novels. turkish coffee. bottle o' tequila with a lime poked down through the neck, floatin' around in there, best on the farm at sunset. lime juice with vodka, rimmed with sugar, with some candlelight and music can be quite nice in a hottub. a zesty australian merlot. lime liqueur with vodka, 50/50, best to sit alone on saint pat's day, alone, in the dark, with a nine inch nails discography on loop. rum is good for watching tv. whisky is good for shooting pool. cognac for celebration.

Color? espresso...rust...honey...deep reds...coral pinks...black...ivory

Number? 7. 27. 72. 19. 91. 8. 21.

Season? fall.

School Subject? psych. history. dance.

Store? borders. b&n. local bookstores. local art stores. local holes in the local wall.

Clothing Brand? wtf?

Sport? horseback riding..........bellydance?

Male Celebrity? harrison ford. hugh jackman. jeff golblum. modest mouse (all of them in combination, but particularly mr. isaac brock, who gives my heart cause to smile). tim gunn (project runway, dude).

Female Celebrity? maggie gillenhaal. helena bonham carter.

Holiday? halloween (death). beltane (love). christmas (an arena of love & death).

Book? the dark tower series by stephen king, but particularly the first book--The Gunslinger--and the fourth, Wizard and the Glass. A Wrinkle In Time - L'Engle. Of Mice and Men - Steinbeck. The Vampire Lestat - Rice. The Shipping News - Proulx. Anthologies by TS Eliot, E.E. Cummings, Yeats, Macleish...And vast, indescript tomes of nonfictional reference material which my mind frequents more than anything.

TV Show? Colbert Report. King of the Hill. Jay Leno. Law & Order.

Movie? The Godfather.

Childhood Toy? robot kit. little plastic figurines. pewter figurines snagged out of grandma's collection. porcelain horses appropriated from mom. books...from anyone who wouldn't notice they were missing. books of cryptograms and logic puzzles. microscopes. silverware. cages for trapping birds...no harm did befall them.

< This or That >

Kisses or Hugs? kisses...slow and deep. unless it's a relative, then...yeah, still kiss. but not so slow. not so deep.

Laugh or Cry? laugh until you cry until you laugh.

City or Country? couity.

Chocolate or Vanilla? dark bitter chocolate.

NYC or LA? chicago, bitches.

Coke or Pepsi? any non-carbonated beverage previously mentioned.

Up North or Down South? ...

Beach or Pool? ocean.

Hot or Cold? hot

Sunny or Rainy? bring on the monsoons.

Shake Ya Tailfeather or Shake Your Laffy Taffy? dear god.

Polka Dots or Stripes? zebra stripes or leopard print.

Baskin Robbins or Dairy Queen? how about coffee and Krispy Kremes?

Twist or Shout? both. at the same time.

Family or Friends? good friends are family. and bad family is dead to me. so what difference does it make?

Boys or Girls? real men and the sauciest of wenches.

McDonalds or Burger King? viva burrito.

Chocolate Milk or White Milk? rice milk.

Love or Money? sugardaddy.

Fantasy or Reality? ground your dreams in reality, grow them there.

Abercrombie or Hollister? i'll tell you what, neither one sells ball-gags.

Hamburgers or Hotdogs? chilidogs. and this was a terrible followup question.

Ketchup or Mustard? spicy mustard.

Day or Night? dusk, then 11PM-6AM, or until the sun rises.

Rap or Country? merle haggard, sucka.

Prep or Emo? transparently emo.

Sweet or Tart? tart.

Blonde or Brunette? blue.

Cats or Dogs? cats, snakes, goats, geese, lemurs, foxes and dogs that act like cats.

Indoors or Outdoors? outdoors.

<3 L.O.V.E <3

Have you ever been in love? yes.

With whom? with new extra-strong garnier fructis curl construct mousse with fruit micro-waxes. it gives me the perfect weightless curls, with maximum hold and shine, minimum frizz. it lets me create MY style by MY rules.

What is true love? 9 times out of 10 it's 90% big-fucking-pain-in-the-ass. 1 time out of 10 it's only 40% big-fucking-pain-in-the-ass.

Does love at first site exist? site...lust at first sight exists...definitely. and sometimes lust can work into love if you stave it off long enough to establish some level of emotional and/or spiritual intimacy.

Do you have a bf or gf? not for lack of invitation.

What is your sexual orientation? a little bit o' this, a little bit o' that...

Is there such a thing as fairytales? Brothers Grimm.

Have you ever been cheated on? you can bet there were spikes in his tires and bleach in his cereal.

Have you ever cheated? on the guy with bleach in his cereal, but he was on his way out, so it didn't really matter, now did it?

Have you ever cried over a guy/girl? you'd have to be a cold or celibate bastard not to.

Do you have a crush? always.

On who? nunya.

Are you a virgin? ♪like a virgin♪

How far have you gone? a few totalled cars. one caught fire and exploded. they had to pull me out, unconscious, rush me to urgent care to sew up my skull. i was amnesiac and crippled. physical rehabilitation got me walking again, but i had black outs for seven months afterwards and still can't count past ten without intense concentration.

Ever hooked up with someone of the same sex? fun times.

Do you want to get married? maybe sometime before i die.

Do you want to have kids? not without a loving, faithful and principled father.

How do you feel about "friends with benefits"? same way i feel about porn.

Would you ever consider having an open relationship with someone? no.

:::In a Boy / Girl:::
Hair Color? whatever.

Eye Color? surprise me.

Height? you must be taller than 5'6 to ride this ride.

Most Important Personality Trait? wisdom. courage. strength of will. loyalty. passion. devotion. appreciation of beauty. post-cognitive morality. forgiveness. quiet strength. abstract thinking. hope. pursuit of truth. sense of humor. and maybe a tiny sadistic streak.

Looks or Personality? why must it always be either-or?

?Random Questions?

Do you think you're attractive? yes, and i am terribly vain.

Do you do drugs? when the mood strikes.

Smoke? when the mood strikes.

Drink? less than before.

Are you friends with people who do? less than before.

If you could meet any athlete, who would it be? chuck noris.

Do you like coffee? yes.

What do you want to be when you grow up? a burlesque dancing psychologist on a goat farm in peru.

How many times a day do you brush your teeth? once, if i'm single.

Have you ever had braces? no

Do you wear contacts or glasses? glasses.

Does God exist? Yes. but I'm with Plato on this one.

What is your religion? Tao is my prevailing philosophy.

What is your clothing style? good guys wear black.

Do you believe in life on other planets? there's life everywhere.

Do you wish on stars? do i wish on distant monolithic balls of fiery gas dangling in the cosmos? no.

Are you pro-life? As opposed to what?

Do you support the death penalty? Yes. I believe in Hammurabi's Code. So stone me now. Or better yet, let's get stoned together.

Do you support gay marriage? Yes.

How do you want to die? Laughing.

Do you have any regrets? No.

Does karma come back and get you? I like to think so. self-flagellation's a time-crunch.

Have you ever been sent to jail? Not for lack of trying.

Have you ever lied? I'm lying right now...

Are you honest? To a fault, actually.

When is your bedtime? 9pm

Have you ever cheated on homework? how else do you think i graduated...oh, wait, i didn't. ha ha

How late do you sleep until? 2am

Are you vegetarian? MEAT.

Do you have a job? Good question.

Are you rich? Someday....when i find the right man.

Who is the funniest comedian? Mitch Hedberg. Stephen Colbert. Ryan Styles. Jay Leno. Drew Cary. Colin Mockrey. Gary Larson. Vero.

Is your hair naturally curly or straight? Straight as a...never mind.

Do you go to tanning beds? Mmm...radioactivity.

What is your natural hair color? You have to wonder, don't you?

Do you die your hair? It wants to live, and I tell it that it's already dead. Inside.

Do you get along with your parents? better now than before.

What is your most prized possesion? love.

What thing do you have an obsession for? zeese reedeeculooos obsezzion weeth lOve.

How many shoes do you own? six shoes, total, out of 3 pairs.

Are you usually a happy person? ♪we'll all float on...♪

Peyton: Hey, Peyton Manning here to talk to you about a great limited-time offer from the Prince of Darkness.

Up to your asshole in debt? Finding payday advance loans and armed robbery to be too much of a hassle? Maybe just want some arbitrary bullshit?

Ever thought of selling your soul to the Devil?

Whoawhoawhoa. Hear me out. And you’ll discover why there’s never been a better time to sell than now.

Don’t be duped into selling your everlasting essence to one of those big corporations or, even worse, some Portuguese guy who promises you a bigger dick. Go with the fictive religious entity with a couple thousand year track record of eternal bargains. We’re offering low introductory rates.

What are you using it for anyway? Why not make that soul work for you?

(cut to family trying to pack their car to go on a vacation)

Mom: The car’s full. We can’t fit anymore.

Dad: If only we didn’t have these damn souls weighing us down!

Peyton Manning: That’s right. They’ll even take Hindus, Sikhs or B’ahai and shit. Whatever it is dark-skinned worship. It’s all good. Believe it or not, but your souls are worth only marginally less than a real person’s.

(SNL)

If I had a day that I could give you
I’d give to you a day just like today
If I had a song that I could sing for you
I’d sing a song to make you feel this way


Sunshine On My Shoulders, John Denver