IVE BEEN DOIN SOME THINKING LATELY... AND IVE COME TO THE POINT WHERE IVE DECIDED IM GOING TO STOP BIENG SO PASSIVE AND NICE LIKE I HAVE BEEN ALL THIS TIME. LIKE THEY SAY: NICE GUYS FINISH LAST. THATS WHY I NEVER GET WHAT I WANT, AND WHEN I DO, ITS ONLY TO HAVE IT TAKEN AWAY LATER ON. ALL THE MISSED OPPORTUNITIES FOR EXAMPLE THAT I SHOULD HAVE TAKEN BUT DIDNT CUZ I WAS TOO NICE. WELL IM DONE. AT THE START OF THIS YEAR, IM DEFINATELY GONNA START BIENG SO MUCH MORE AGGRESSIVE TO PEOPLE IN GENERAL.

IM SO FUCKING TIRED OF EVERYONE TRYING TO CHANGE ME ALL THE TIME... IF THEY DONT LIKE ME THAN WHY HANGOUT WITH ME DAY IN AND DAY OUT? THERES PLENTY OF OTHER PEOPLE OUT THERE FOR THEM TO JUDGE AND CRITICIZE. LIKE MY MOM FOR EXAMPLE. SHES LIKE, "YOU NEED TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH YOUR FAMILY. EVERYTIME THEY COME OVER OR WE GO TO THEIR HOUSES YOU ALWAYS HAVE UR iPOD OR A BOOK. YOU ALWAYS CLOSE YOURSELF IN YOUR OWN LITTLE WORLD AND DONT TALK OR OPEN UP TO ANYONE. YOU DONT EVEN HAVE ANY FRIENDS."

OBVIOUSLY IF I NEEDED FRIENDS OR WANTED THEM ID MAKE SOME. ITS NOT THAT I CANT. I GET ALONG WITH PEOPLE JUST FINE, I JUST DONT WANT TO. WOULD YOU BELIEVE SHE WAS SO WORRIED ABOUT ME NOT BIENG OPEN OR CLOSE TO ANYBODY, THAT SHE ACUTALLY SENT ME TO SEE A SHRINK? MOST IF NOT ALL THE PEOPLE IM "FRIENDS" WITH, I CONSIDER NOTHING MORE THAN ACCUAINTANCES. PAWNS SO TO SPEAK TO AT MY DISPOSTION.

This is so hilarious... Lolz.

If World War Two had been an online Real Time Strategy game, the chat room traffic would have gone something like this.


*Hitler has joined the game.*
*Eisenhower has joined the game.*
*paTTon has joined the game.*
*Churchill has joined the game.*
*benny-tow has joined the game.*
*T0J0 has joined the game.*
*Roosevelt has joined the game.*
*Stalin has joined the game.*
*deGaulle has joined the game.*
Roosevelt: hey sup
T0J0: y0
Stalin: hi
Churchill: hi
Hitler: cool, i start with panzer tanks!
paTTon: lol more like panzy tanks
T0JO: lol
Roosevelt: o this fockin sucks i got a depression!
benny-tow: haha america sux
Stalin: hey hitler you dont fight me i dont fight u, cool?
Hitler; sure whatever
Stalin: cool
deGaulle: **** Hitler rushed some1 help
Hitler: lol byebye frenchy
Roosevelt: i dont got **** to help, sry
Churchill: wtf the luftwaffle is attacking me
Roosevelt: get antiair guns
Churchill: i cant afford them
benny-tow: u n00bs know what team talk is?
paTTon: stfu
Roosevelt: o yah hit the navajo button guys
deGaulle: eisenhower ur worthless come help me quick
Eisenhower: i cant do **** til rosevelt gives me an army
paTTon: yah hurry the fock up
Churchill: d00d im gettin pounded
deGaulle: this is fockin weak u guys suck
*deGaulle has left the game.*
Roosevelt: im gonna attack the axis k?
benny-tow: with what? ur wheelchair?
benny-tow: lol did u mess up ur legs AND ur head?
Hitler: ROFLMAO
T0J0: lol o no america im comin 4 u
Roosevelt: wtf! thats bullsh1t u fags im gunna kick ur asses
T0JO: not without ur harbors u wont! lol
Roosevelt: u little biotch ill get u
Hitler: wtf
Hitler: america hax, u had depression and now u got a huge fockin army
Hitler: thats bullsh1t u hacker
Churchill: lol no more france for u hitler
Hitler[aoede]: tojo help me!
T0J0: wtf u want me to do, im on the other side of the world retard
Hitler: fine ill clear you a path
Stalin: WTF u arsshoel! WE HAD A FoCKIN TRUCE
Hitler: i changed my mind lol
benny-tow: haha
benny-tow: hey ur losing ur guys in africa im gonna need help in italy soon sum1
T0J0: o **** i cant help u i got my hands full
Hitler: im 2 busy 2 help
Roosevelt: yah thats right ***** im comin for ya
Stalin: church help me
Churchill: like u helped me before? sure ill just sit here
Stalin: dont be an arss
Churchill: dont be a commie. oops too late
Eisenhower: LOL
benny-tow: hahahh oh sh1t help
Hitler: o man ur focked
paTTon: oh what now biotch
Roosevelt: whos the cripple now lol
*benny-tow has been eliminated.*
benny-tow: lame
Roosevelt: gj patton
paTTon: thnx
Hitler: WTF eisenhower hax hes killing all my sh1t
Hitler: quit u hacker so u dont ruin my record
Eisenhower: Nuts!
benny~tow: wtf that mean?
Eisenhower: meant to say nutsack lol finger slipped
paTTon: coming to get u hitler u paper hanging hun cocksocker
Stalin: rofl
T0J0: HAHAHHAA
Hitler: u guys are fockin gay
Hitler: ur never getting in my city
*Hitler has been eliminated.*
benny~tow: OMG u noob you killed yourself
Eisenhower: ROFLOLOLOL
Stalin: OMG LMAO!
Hitler: WTF i didnt click there omg this game blows
*Hitler has left the game*
paTTon: hahahhah
T0J0: WTF my teammates are n00bs
benny~tow: shut up noob
Roosevelt: haha wut a moron
paTTon: wtf am i gunna do now?
Eisenhower: yah me too
T0J0: why dont u attack me o thats right u dont got no ships lololol
Eisenhower: fock u
paTTon: lemme go thru ur base commie
Stalin: go to hell lol
paTTon: fock this sh1t im goin afk
Eisenhower: yah this is gay
*Roosevelt has left the game.*
Hitler: wtf?
Eisenhower: sh1t now we need some1 to join
*tru_m4n has joined the game.*
tru_m4n: hi all
T0J0: hey
Stalin: sup
Churchill: hi
tru_m4n: OMG OMG OMG i got all his stuff!
tru_m4n: NUKES! HOLY **** I GOT NUKES
Stalin: d00d gimmie some plz
tru_m4n: no way i only got like a couple
Stalin: omg dont be gay gimmie nuculer secrets
T0J0: wtf is nukes?
T0J0: holy ****holy****hoyl****!
*T0J0 has been eliminated.*
*The Allied team has won the game!*
Eisenhower: awesome!
Churchill: gg noobs no re
T0J0: thats bull**** u fockin suck
*T0J0 has left the game.*
*Eisenhower has left the game.*
Stalin: next game im not going to be on ur team, u guys didnt help me for ****
Churchill: wutever, we didnt need ur help neway dumbarss
tru_m4n: l8r all
benny~tow: bye
Churchill: l8r
Stalin: fock u all
tru_m4n: shut up commie lol
*tru_m4n has left the game.*
benny~tow: lololol u commie
Churchill: ROFL
Churchill: bye commie
*Churchill has left the game.*
*benny~tow has left the game.*
Stalin: i hate u all fags
*Stalin has left the game.*
paTTon: lol no1 is left
paTTon: weeeee i got a jeep
*paTTon has been eliminated.*
paTTon: o sh1t!
*paTTon has left the game.*

SO MUCH FOR SUMMER... I'VE WAITED FOR IT ALL YEAR LONG, AND NOW THAT ITS COME I'VE NAUGHT TO DO, BUT WATCH TELEVISION ALL DAY OR READ BOOKS WHICH I'VE READ TIME AND TIME AGAIN... MY MOTHER EXPECTS ME TO GO OUTSIDE AND DO WHATEVER JUST AS LONG AS I GET SOME EXERCISE, THOUGH HOW SHE EXPECTS ME TO DO SO I TRULY DON'T KNOW, BECAUSE OUTSIDE IT'S LITERALLY ABOUT 110 DEGREES... IF ANYTHING, I'D END UP DYING FROM DEHYDRATION, LEST A HEAT STROKE SHOULD COME FIRST... MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 4 DAYS. AS USUAL, NOONE HAS CALLED OR EVEN MENTIONED IT... SO MUCH FOR MY FRIENDS, TO NEVER REMEMBER. PERHAPS I SHALL RETURN THE FAVOR TO MY FRIENDS AS WELL AS MY FAMILY... THAN AGAIN I CAN'T ACTUALLY EXPECT MUCH FROM THEM CONSIDERING I DON'T HAVE ANY "REAL" FRIENDS SO TO SPEAK... MOST OF MY SO CALLED FRIENDS I CONSIDER THEM TO NOTHING MORE THAN ACCUANTANCES...

SO MUCH FOR SUMMER... I'VE WAITED FOR IT ALL YEAR LONG, AND NOW THAT ITS COME I'VE NAUGHT TO DO, BUT WATCH TELEVISION ALL DAY OR READ BOOKS WHICH I'VE READ TIME AND TIME AGAIN... MY MOTHER EXPECTS ME TO GO OUTSIDE AND DO WHATEVER JUST AS LONG AS I GET SOME EXERCISE, THOUGH HOW SHE EXPECTS ME TO DO SO I TRULY DON'T KNOW, BECAUSE OUTSIDE IT'S LITERALLY ABOUT 110 DEGREES... IF ANYTHING, I'D END UP DYING FROM DEHYDRATION, LEST A HEAT STROKE SHOULD COME FIRST... MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 4 DAYS. AS USUAL, NOONE HAS CALLED OR EVEN MENTIONED IT... SO MUCH FOR MY FRIENDS, TO NEVER REMEMBER. PERHAPS I SHALL RETURN THE FAVOR TO MY FRIENDS AS WELL AS MY FAMILY... THAN AGAIN I CAN'T ACTUALLY EXPECT MUCH FROM THEM CONSIDERING I DON'T HAVE ANY "REAL" FRIENDS SO TO SPEAK... MOST OF MY SO CALLED FRIENDS I CONSIDER THEM TO NOTHING MORE THAN ACCUANTANCES...

  I don't know what to do anymore. I'm not depressed or suicidal or anything. For the last 2 years or so, I've lost interest in all the things that I once enjoyed. I'm slowly crawling away from my friends. Nothing seems to interest me. I just wish I could be different. One day, once I'm old enough, I'm going to live in another state or country, and neither my friends nor my family will ever hear from me again. I'll make a new life.

SOMETHING THAT REALLLY BOTHERS ME IS MY MOTHER. SHE SITS THERE AND CRITIZISES THE ENTIRE WORLD LIKE SHE IS PERFECT. EVERYDAY SHE YELLS AT ME FOR EVERY LITTLE THING I DO, OR DON'T DO. SHE ALWAYS POINTS OUT THE THINGS I DO WRONG, AND NEVER THE THINGS DONE RIGHT. SHE SEE'S A GUY WITH A MOWHAWK, AND RIGHT AWAY SHE SAYS: "THAT BOY MUST BE IN A GANG". OR SOMETHING OF THE SORT, ALOMST LIKE IT'S AN INSTICNT. I SUPPOSE PEOPLE WILL NEVER LEARN FROM THEIR MISTAKES. THUSLY MY MOTHER WILL NEVER ADHERE TO THE SAYING- NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER.

Than the phrase: Momento Mori. A quote so fitting for myself; it's Latin. It means " Remember I Will Die." Sort makes me think of what things shall be happening, and what the weather will be like the day I die. Along with what sort of people will be at my funeral. I only want to learn Latin, and hopefully find the love of my life ere I die.

Well as everyone probably knows, life is never what one wants it to be. For some, this may prove very unfortunate. Others just make the best of it. Either way, one can only hope to learn from their mistakes. Something I'm don't seem to be very good at...
  I know many of you out there have probably heard people speak about how they hate their lives and what not, because noone understands them, and they have no friends. These people mostly make themselves martyrs.
  I on the other hand, honestly don't enjoy my life all that much, or at all for that matter.I have friends. A loving family, whom for all the love in the world they give me, wish to have nothing to do with me.
  At school people see me as this cheerful, funny, guy who is always in a good mood and doesnt hold grudges toward anyone. Least of all, I end up liking a girl, which later on I end up finding that she only sees me as a friend. That's the only thing I'm good for. When I leave this place, than they will all see what they missed out on. Because once I'm old enough, I shall disappear. Not that anyone should care, since no one, far as I know is fond of me.