Ok guys, the reason i asked you to join me here is because i need you to know something. if you already don't care then leave, but if you do then please read on. I am SICK AND TIRED of playing games. theres 2 guys in particular that i'm talking about but only one is on this site. So you know who you are, either make up your mind or i'm gonna throw you out the door. that sounds kinda harsh but for all the shit you've done to me i'm at that point that if you try to play another game i'll fuckin do it, and you know i will. My friends that actualy know who i am and what i'm like, i know i've told you that this is the last time before, and it wasn't but this time i've sworn to myself to not lie (to myself or to anyone) about anything. And unfortunetly for the people that i'm not happy for, i'm sorry, but shits about to get a whol lot worse. so here it is you guys. You want my attention, don't lie to me, don't try to play games, don't try to play me, and we'll get along just fine. thanks to who ever stayed and read this.
Here I am once again,
to tell you about how crappy my life is, and how much i want to end it. Pills don't work, i'm amune to them. Cutting won't help, that'll just match the blood drops to all the tears drops that have roled off my face. But all the tears have dried up, and all that is left is anger. To tell you why i'm saying all this, there is a aprt of my story that I should share with you. Last night I was on the phone with a really cool guy, well I ended up spilling to him about this guy that hit me last night. He didn't react like I had thought he would have. Most guys ask me if i deserved it, some ask me if I cried just so they could make fun of me. I'm not sure what I should do. I want to get the hell away from here, but have no place to go. I was hit twice last night, and thank god it didn't leave that big of a bruise, it's just majorly smolen.What should I do. Leave this place, or tough it out? But if I leave that means I leave my whole life here behind, including my boyfriend. But he's another story that might be ending soon.
I love him so much, but I don't think i can make this work. I don't think that he feels the same about me as i do him, and I'm tired of giving all the attention and everything to him, but not getting any back. How lame is that. I'm thinking about breaking up with him, but i'm scared to cause I don't want to stop being friends with him. I love him alot, but he doesn't even act like he likes me, so i guess i might just have to do this. But how, i don't know how to brake up with him, (if i do) and plus, it's the lonliness that kicks in. But I think i can faze it for a while.
Ok so get this. My life was going so well then all of a sudden it's screwed up in a heart beat. My boyfriend is hiding something from me, theres a few of my friends saying that hes cheating on me, and all I can do is sit back and wish that this wouldn't happen. I love my boyfriend, but i'm scared that i might have to break up with him. But more than that, i'm scared to be alone. I don't like not having a boyfriend, just because theres no one there to hold you when you need to be held. I just want to find a guy that won't cheat on me, lie to me, not come and see me, not call me, and actually seem atracted to me. He doesn't seem like he is, and thats what makes me think he's cheating on me most of all, because he actually used to look at me like he wanted me, he used to touch me, kiss me, and all that good stuff, but now he doesn't. I mean am I really that resistable, or is it that theres something else going on? Where can I find a guy like that, that does all these things? I just hope one exists.
Ok so get this. My life was going so well then all of a sudden it's screwed up in a heart beat. My boyfriend is hiding something from me, theres a few of my friends saying that hes cheating on me, and all I can do is sit back and wish that this wouldn't happen. I love my boyfriend, but i'm scared that i might have to break up with him. But more than that, i'm scared to be alone. I don't like not having a boyfriend, just because theres no one there to hold you when you need to be held. I just want to find a guy that won't cheat on me, lie to me, not come and see me, not call me, and actually seem atracted to me. He doesn't seem like he is, and thats what makes me think he's cheating on me most of all, because he actually used to look at me like he wanted me, he used to touch me, kiss me, and all that good stuff, but now he doesn't. I mean am I really that resistable, or is it that theres something else going on? Where can I find a guy like that, that does all these things? I just hope one exists.
Ok so get this. MY 17th birthday is tomorrow, and no ones doing anyhting for me. Well except my dad, who's taking me out to celebrate, and my ex girlfriend but i don't know what shes doing. And out mutual friend who got me i think they said a teddy bear (i love stuffed animals) and a carton of ciggs, which is great cuase i'm gonna need them. I have to babysit my little cousin starting tomorrow..on my birthday of all days. I was gonna have a party but that got cancled when i was reminded about babysitting. Well at least I get to see my lil' sis and bro. Thats a plus. But you wanna know the worst thing of all. My own boyfriend isn't doing anyhthing or getting me anything at all. I told him that i don't want him to do anything big, like he was supposedly trying to do a while back, but just be there get me a teddy bear or something ( i really do like them lol) But he's not even gonna do that. He's not even gonna be there, cause he's got plans with his buddies. How lame is that. I just wanted to see him. I've never actually had a birthday where i wasn't alone. And now that i have a boyfriend, it's like i don't, cause he's not gonna do anything. But hey, if my friends are there then thats all i need. So for anyone who ever feels like i do, just realize that your friends are there for you. You aren't alone is they're there. Bye all, and happy birthday to me.
So, lifes still a major bitch. I had a miscvarriage 3 weeks ago yesterday. I have a great boyfriend..fin
I have one question that i need help answering. My friend is pregnant, but she won't tell the guy cause she thinks that he won't want anything to do with her or the child, and i agree. I don't think he would either. She says that he'll probably call her a liar or a slut, but she says that she hasn't had sex since him, and i believe her. So... The question is, should she tell him even though he might do all this, or should she just keep it to herself and raise the chid on her own. Please, please, please....help with this question. I have my own opinion, but what do you think she should do. I want guys and girls opinions. I need both sides.
I fell for a guy that isn't true. He loved with nothing real. I wish..... I guess I shouldn't say that I wish cause anything I wish upon doesn't come to be. I don't want to be loved with anything that is true. But does that even exist? What is truth? What is love? Does any of it actually exist?
I just found out that a person to whom I thought was a friend hates me cause of something I said. But what I hope she understands is that I wouldn't tell her anything but the truth. I don't lie unless important. I don't lie unless it will hurt that person. Even so I tell only wehat they need to know, nothing more, nothing less.
I have only one other thing to say. And that is: If you want to speak the truth, have a great conversation, or just chat about relationships (yours or others) then please feel free to message me. I will anwser any questions you may have truthfuly or tell you what I feel you need to know.