I got back to Alma today. You will never guess. Jay and I are going out again. I don't really understand how it happened. But it did. And I think he's gonna come see me soon. I hope he does. And I do wanna have sex with him again. I know that we should wait. But I don't really wanna. And neither does he. He told me that he still loves me. But he was mad at me and that he was just as surprised as I was when we got back together. He was the one that did it though. And if I graduate from college he said that I can come live with him. And I really wanna. But my mom said no. But I'm who I am. And I'm gonna do what I want. I'm an adult. So I'm gonna live with Jay if we are still together or friends. He made me promise that if it didn't work out with us that I'm gonna get myself a new boyfriend. I told him I would. But I don't know. I really love Jay. And I want to be with him. But I don't know that it isn't gonna work. I really wanna. And I'm gonna try to work it out with him. And that would be by giving up somethings and working together. But he wants me to do a lot of sexual things. But I'm not really sure about all of that. So yeah. I'll work on it with him. But I'm gonna go for now. I'll talk to you later sometime. And hopefully everything works out for me and Jay. I'm wishing a lot. Later. <3

My computer is retarded. Oh well. I'm gonna take it Morely though. So it should be better by tommorow night. I'll talk to you later.

I'm watching Batman. It's awesome. But really weird. Eh. Jay is single now. He was gonna get married to some ra ra girl. But she cheated on him. So he left her. And he told me that he had given her a fair warning. So it was fair. And she knew the consequences of her actions. Oh well. Some people are stupid. I've been down that road. And I don't wanna do it again. It wasn't fun for any of the people involved. But yeah. I don't think he likes me all that much anymore. And I think that he would never consider going back out with me. Oh well. I guess that I need to move on. I don't really wanna. Cuz I love him. But people just don't like me much. I have a shitty life. And I don't even wanna be in college. I don't really give a shit anymore. And because of that, I'm gonna end up failing out of college. There's nothing that I wanna do here. I just wanna drop out. But that would cost a lot of money in the long run. And my parents are gonna be so mad and disappointed with me. They want me to succeed. But unfortunately, I don't really wanna do anything. I don't really care to be in school. I just want a job that I love and that gives me enough money to be happy. And I want someone that I can love. And that loves me too. But I haven't really found anyone. I was happy with Jay. But I don't think he was all that happy with me. I don't know. Maybe I can talk to him about giving me another chance. I doubt it though. I think I messed up pretty bad. Oh well. Maybe I can find someone else if he doesn't wanna take me back. I'll try. But I need to see him in order to do that. But I guess I'm out. It's been a long day. I'll write when there is something to write. Prolly when I get the letter that I'm being kicked out of college. I bet I'll be getting that soon. Not sure though. But later sometime.

Yeah, I have nothing to report. Nothing going on here. Oh well. Life is boring. Still.

I have a make-up lab to do tonight. So I get to see White Dragon. I'm happy. Not very happy to see my lab partner. He was like a lot pissed at me. Oh well. He needs to get over it. At least I get to see White Dragon. Nothing much to do here. I'm so sick of Andrea the R.A. She doesn't even do anything for me. She sucks ass as an R.A. So yeah. My mom wrote her a letter. It was pretty mean. But I loved it. It said what my mom meant and all that stuff. So I'm cool with it. I just don't want Andrea to come and talk to me. I don't wanna have to deal with that shit. But my mom just texted me and told me that she's heard from Willard the Hall Manager thingy. I'm not really sure what he is. But yeah. Ok. Weird. But I hope that something gets done. But I have to go soon. I have to get my laundry. I'll talk to you later when I get the chance.

I don't feel all that well. And we just had a fire-drill. Totally not awesome. Yeah. At least it wasn't cold outside. But no one knows what caused the fire-drill. So yeah. Wee. Bored. My finger doesn't hurt though. And I'm good. I'm bored though. I'll talk to you later.

Yeah. I'm back. Nothing much to do here. I'm not feeling the greatest. And it really sucks. I just wanna feel better. But at least I can bend my finger further than I could a few days ago. That's a good thing. I'm bored here. And Shannon really wants to do a make-over. And I totally don't want her to. I don't like stuff like that. I just want to chill out in my room and be not bored and watch t.v. I really hope that my finger will be back to normal. I doubt it but I hope. And I hope that Jay and Ashley don't get married. I don't really think it's what he wants. In the long-run at least. I don't want him back but I want him to be happy. He's still my friend. Kind of. He only calls me when he's bored. But we talk about stuff all the time. So yeah. And she sounds like a huge bitch. So I hope that it doesn't work out. I just kinda want a boyfriend. I don't know if I'll find one here. Oh well. I really want someone that loves me. But I don't know if anyone will like or love me because I'm a lot weird. But I might be able to change. That's what college is for I think. Not sure about that though. Wee! Bored. I'm gonna go and watch ICarly. I'll write later or tomorrow. Byebye for now.

Yeah. I have my own room. I'm happy now. And I'm able type with my pinky now. I'm happy about that too. Cuz it's out of the thing now. Life is better. Now that I don't have a roommate and that my finger is somewhat better. I still can't bend it all the way. I'm currently watching Criminal Minds. It's like a marathon. Like three or four in a row. Cool I think. Yep. Nothing to do here. I don't have anything to do for the rest of the weekend. No homework or anything. Just cleaning and taking care of my trash. I'm bored. And I don't think I'm going to be hanging out with anyone this weekend. So yeah. Bored, bored, bored, bored, bored! Nothing to do at all. Meow. Grr. Oh, I'm going to be keeping my rat from my psychology lab. His name is White Dragon. And I think that I'm going to get him a friend. But I would have to get him a girl. Because males fight. But my dad doesn't even want White Dragon. And he told me that I can't get a female rat for him. Cuz he doesn't want babies. And he doesn't like rats. He thinks they aren't pets. I can see that. But this rat isn't wild and he's nice and cute! I love him. And he's really smart. I'm training him to bar-press. He's an albino. With pink/red eyes. He's so cute! And my finger feels better when I'm typing. So I think I'm going to try to type every day so I can get my finger back to working. The doctor said that I'll prolly get about 80% of my movement back in my pinky. That's not very good. I want all of it back. But 80% is really good considering what I did to my finger. I made a whole new joint in my finger at the bottom. So yeah. Awesome. Not really. But yeah, I'm gonna go and watch Criminal Minds. So yeah. Later. I'll prolly be back tomorrow. Not sure though. Later. Byebye.

So Kelly totally ignored me for three whole days. And during those three days, I saw her for a total of an hour. An hour out of 36! That's pretty fucking bad. Not that I care. She told me today that she's moving in with Tara the horse's ass faced stupid slutty girl who sounds like a guy. Anyway, I already knew this was gonna happen. I just didn't let her know that I knew. And I'm pissed off at Andrea the R.A. She knew there was a problem yesterday. But did she do anything about it? Hell no she didn't. Stupid bitch. I hate her. Anyway, I'm gonna go to Willard later today and talk to him about what's going on. At least I have a room to myself. I don't have to deal with a preppy like bitch anymore. That's totally a good thing. I hate her. I can't wait til Tara gets sick of her and comes bitching to me. I'm gonna tell her flat out that I really don't give a fuck. It's her fucking problem now. Not mine. Stupid bitches. They need to grow the hell up and stop being so lame. Oh well. I have to get up at 9. Not fun. I'll talk to you later. I don't know when exactly though. Bye!

I'm back. I had massive homework yesterday. That's why I wasn't on here. But Shannon, Annalise, and I redid the chalk board. It's awesome. It has fairies on it with wings and ballet slippers. It's cute. But girly. I took like a million pictures. I liked it. At least we now have something on the board instead of just a black board. It's awesome that we get together and do that. I'm weird. I also took a whole crap-load of random pictures cuz I was bored. So yeah. But I have to get up at 9. So I'm gonna go to bed now. I'll see if I can get on later. I don't know what I'll be up to. So maybe. Later. Loves!

Stupid thing. Logged me out due to inactivity. Oh well. I don't need surgery on my finger. So that's good. I'm happy about that. Yay! I was watching Myth-Busters! Yay! I love that show. But I have to go. I have English to read for tomorrow. Later.

Hey. Long time no write. I've been busy. Doing homework. And breaking my pinky finger on my left hand. So it's hard to type. Stupid snow ball fights. I hate them. Oh well. On Monday the doctors are gonna take more x-rays to see if I need to have pins put in. I really hope that I don't. Cuz that would really fuck with my semester. I don't want to be kicked out of college! My last semester's grades were really bad. I had a 1.8. That's the lowest that I've ever had! I'm on academic probation. And I'll get in trouble if I do bad again this semester. And mom and dad will be mad at me and disappointed. Fun. At least Kelly will prolly be moving in with Tara. Then I'll have the room to myself. And then I will actually be able to study without her bugging me all the time. Yay! I hope she moves soon! That would be nice. Yeah. I like it here in Alma. So I don't really wanna leave. Plus I'm proud of myself becuz I'm actually in college. And I've lasted longer than my sister did. But she didn't like college at all. Some of my classes aren't really all that bad. I just don't like my professor for Famous Trials of the 19th Century. She's a bitch. Oh well. I can't like them all. But I absolutely love my math teacher. Yeah, a miracle that I like math now. But she actually is there for me and answers my questions. I can actually understand what she's saying. It's cool cuz I don't have to be bored in math now. But yeah, I need to go to bed. My parents are picking me up in like ten hours. And I haven't finished my homework and packing and I haven't showered. So maybe I'm not going to bed. I gotta do all of that stuff! Ack!

it's always busy around here. even if it's the weekend. and yeah, i'm going nuts here. kelly and asa are always here and they are being stupid. and fucking alot. yeah it's so fucking annoying. so yeah. im gonna go crazy if they dont stop. but he said that he wouldn't be back for another two weeks. and i hope he's telling the truth. TWO WEEKS FREE OF ASA! HELL YEAH! i can't wait til he's gone. i just kinda wish she would be pregnant so she would get pulled outta school. then i could get a new roommate. that would be nice. and they prolly wouldn't fuck if i had a new roommate. i emailed jay a few days ago. and he responded. i was surprised. and yeah. i guess i'll talk to him. but i don't really know if i wanna date him again. i doubt it would work. it never does. and i do know that i don't wanna date otto again. anyway, he as in jay seemed like he was ok. i don't know though for sure. and there's no way i'm gonna tell my mom that i'm talking to jay again. she would kill me. cuz she's always like he's not good enough for you and he treats you like shit. he was the first one that i even loved. so yeah. and i liked the sex. even though i told otto that i didn't. oh shit. i'm in deep with the lies i know that. i just keep going. i think i'm gonna email otto and tell him that i'm not gonna date him again. but that would hurt him. and he is a friend. so i don't know what to do. i don't wanna hurt him. but i want him to leave me alone. i just don't know what the hell to do anymore. and that's what i always say. eh. i don't know. maybe i'll just bring it up lightly. maybe that will work. i don't know. i will talk to you when i get the chance. no idea when that is gonna be. so yeah. i will ttyl. byebye.

sorry i havent had time to write. its been busy around here. just too much to do in so little time. its crazy. school is awesome. i love it. i dont really like nutrition though. and my freshman year seminar is kinda hard. and i didnt go yesterday. and i didnt do the homework that was supposed to be due yesterday. so yeah. i dont know how im gonna pass that class. but i have to in order to graduate. so yeah. me thinks me is fucked. but yeah. i like english so far. my teacher is funny as hell. someone sneezed and instead of saying bless you, he said go to hell. i was funny. but yeah. thats about it for now. nothing real interesting. im gonna go to the movie on the chapel lawn on friday though. i will talk to you later though. byebye for now. and i will try to write on here more. but no promises.

yeah, ive been really fucking busy. so i havent had time to write on here. but ive been doing homework. and i like my math teacher and my math class. so yeah. im doing pretty good. id be better if i could get some sex. but i dont know anybody that well or anybody that i wanna. so i guess im not gonna get laid. so yeah. bored. nothing to do. i finished my homework already. and i have my fys at 7 to 930. but yeah. ill talk to you sometime. dont know when. byebye for now i guess.

pre-term is over. finally. i didnt do that last paper that i was supposed to do. so i wouldnt be surprised if i didnt pass my pre-term. but thats ok i think. i was there all the time and i did everything else that i was supposed to. so yeah. i should do pretty good. yeah, im bored right now. im watching thr real world cancun. its so dumb. bored. bored. bored. bored. bored. i was playing on facebook. and now there is nothing to do at all. and my parents should be here soon. so yeah. we are going to see whats down town and whats in mount pleasant. so yeah. thats about it for today. so im gonna go now. ill talk to you later sometime. byebye for now.

today was the funnest day ever! we had three new guys up here in the room and we were playing bullshit and uno and spoons. it was so fun. and i was yelling hi at anyone that would walk by our room. so yeah. the people out in the hall thought i was crazy and stuff. but oh well. i like it here. not really looking forward to class tomorrow. but i have to go. or ill get written up. so yeah. but im gonna go to bed now. yeah. byebye for now.

yeah, we moved into alma today. so im all alone in alma. with no parents. it really hasnt sunk in yet i dont think. cuz im not all like omg i miss my parents yet. so yeah. but ill be ok i think. i really hope i will be. and i had a cute guy fix my computer. so yeah. but i think hes gay. he had all the signs of a gay guy. but thats not something id ask him. and hes like older than me. so he has rank on me. so yeah. but i have to go now. i dont think kelly has a key to get into the room. so yeah. ill talk to you later. byebye.

i hate stupid people. stacey texted me telling me that she broke up with eric. i knew that already. but she honestly thinks that im gonna give a flying fuck? nope, not sry, i dont. i dont care about her anymore. and amber texted me asking if i was still mad at stacey. i didnt answer her either. and alex called me twice saying someone got a hold of him and wanted to know if i was still mad at them. i didnt answer and havent responded but im thinking, why the fuck are you beating around the goddamn bush?! i already know who it is and i know you know and that you know that i know that you dont normally beat around the bush. i just wanna know when theyre gonna all take a hint and be like, 'oh, meghan is mad at us and doesnt wanna talk to us cuz shes mad at us.' but hell no, that aint gonna happen. just wish it would. but nope. stupid people piss me the hell off. i just wanna beat them all into fucking bloody pulps. and then make it illegal to be fucking stupid. but i dont see that happening any time soon. but ill talk to you later. dont know when. but later. byebye.
the very angry meghan

i just go back from birch run. we went shopping for school clothes and stuff. and i got some socks and some earrings and some nail polish. we stayed in the hotel 8. and i took the pen and pad of paper. lol. it was an ok hotel. they had t.v. so that was cool with me. but right now, im on the internet cuz i missed it so much. yeah, mom and dad are fighting again. what a surprise. not really. yeah, im gonna go now. gonna go play vampires again. or maybe uno. but ill talk to you later. byebye.

i got a camera in the mail today! yay! and now i can take it off to school with me. otto still likes me. and i still like him. but i dont know what to do about it. hes with katie la ponsie. and he says he loves her. but eh. i have to go. my computers about to die.