English is really crazy
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth? One goose, 2 geese. So, one moose, 2 meese? One index, two indices? Is cheese the plural of choose?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

In what language do people recite at a play, and play at a recital?

Ship by truck, and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? How can the weather be hot as hell one day and cold as hell another?

When a house burns up, it burns down. You fill in a form by filling it out, and an alarm clock goes off by going on.

When the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it.

Hope

I read of how a reporter went into the rooms where the children where kept in WWII before being taken to the gas chambers and on the walls they had drawn butterflies. Even though they knew they were going to die they drew butterflies. Can you imagine? No matter what happens as long as you live dont loose hope. 

Stolen from Nips house, I found this very amusing but as in all generalizations only partly true. 

"nice guy curse"

This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute, beautiful, smart, funny, or sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl in every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style. This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they are at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don't end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you. This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you'd ever orchestrated in Halo2 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn't have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing serious between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: oh, but we're just friends! And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you're nice like that. The nice guys don't often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don't seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can't. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as oh, he's too nice to date or he would be a good boyfriend but he's not for me or she already puts up with so much from me, I couldn't possibly ask him out! or the most frustrating of all: no, it would ruin our friendship.Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can't figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn't last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single. So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you're sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgment, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

--anonymous

stolen from someone elses house, stolen from who knows where......

FOREGONE CONCLUSION:*~

(A) The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

(B) On the other hand, the French eat a lot of fat and also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

(C) The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

(D) The Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and
also suffer fewer heart attacks than the British or Americans.

(E) Conclusion: Eat & drink what you like. It's speaking English that kills you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We’re going up Wezzending
We’re going up and away
We’re going up Wezzending
Till the break of day

We’re going up Wezzending
Wezzending through the night
We’re going up Wezzending
What a beautiful sight

We’re going up Wezzending
We’re taking you along
We’re going up Wezzending
And singing this song

too much is risked on far to little and not enough on nothing at all

It occurs to me that I am incredibly vain, but it has done me a great service. Much the same way my best friend stabbed me in the back to save my life. I love him. I love all my friends. I think I should sleep now. Tiredness and random typings combine in strange strange ways.

Can you get drunk of three glasses of champange? If you usually never drink? 

Things that make me happy.

God: Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.

God: Yes. In every term, Experience is a hard teacher. She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.

God: Problems are Purposeful Roadblocks Offering Beneficial Lessons to Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance, not when you are free from problems.

God: When they suffer they ask, "why me?" When they prosper, they never ask "Why me". Everyone wishes to have truth on their side, but few want to be on the side of the truth.

Description:

God: Hello. Did you call me?

Me: Called you? No... Who is this?


God: This is GOD. I heard your prayers. So I thought I will chat.


Me: I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am actually busy now I

am in the midst of something..


God: What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.


Me: Don't know. But I cant find free time. Life has become hectic.

It's rush hour all the time.


God: Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity gets you results.

Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.


Me: I understand. But I still cant figure it out. By the way, I was

not expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging chat.


God: Well I wanted to resolve your fight for time, by giving you

some clarity. In this net era, I wanted to reach you through the

medium you are comfortable with.


Me: Tell me, why has life become complicated now?


God: Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is what makes it

complicated.


Me: why are we then constantly unhappy?


God: Your today is the tomorrow that you worried about yesterday.

You are worrying because you are analyzing. Worrying has become

your habit. That’s why you are not happy.


Me: But how can we not worry when there is so much uncertainty?


god: Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is optional.


Me: But then, there is so much pain due to uncertainty…


God: Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.


Me: If suffering is optional, why do good people always suffer?


God: Diamond cannot be polished without friction. Gold cannot be purified without fire. Good people go through trials, but don't suffer. With that experience their life becomes better not bitter.


Me: You mean to say such experience is useful?


God: Yes. In every term, Experience is a hard teacher. She gives the test first and the lessons afterwards.


Me: But still, why should we go through such tests? Why can't we be free from problems?


God: Problems are Purposeful Roadblocks Offering Beneficial Lessons to Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength comes from struggle and endurance, not when you are free from problems.


Me: Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we don't know where we are heading..


God: If you look outside you will not know where you are heading. Look inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking inside, you awaken. Eyes provide sight. Heart provides insight.


Me: Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to hurt more than moving in the right direction. What should I do?


God: Success is a measure as decided by others. Satisfaction is a measure as decided by you. Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than knowing you rode ahead. You work with the compass. Let others work with the clock.


Me: In tough times, how do you stay motivated?


God: Always look at how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. ! Always count your blessing, not what you are missing.


Me: What surprises you about people?


God: When they suffer they ask, "why me?" When they prosper, they never ask "Why me". Everyone wishes to have truth on their side, but few want to be on the side of the truth.


Me: Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here. I can't get the answer.


God: Seek not to find who you are, but to determine who you want to be. Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are here. Create it. Life is not a process of discovery but a process of creation.

Face your past without regret. Handle your present with confidence. Prepare for the future without fear.

Keep the faith and drop the fear. Don't believe your doubts and doubt your beliefs. Life is a mystery to solve, not a problem to resolve.Trust me. Life is wonderful if you know how to live it.

Stolen from [oryza sativa]
Just found it interesting

Christmas Poem

Snow falls soft and light
Candles burn hot and bright
One raises a tree
Decorated for all to see
Displayed proud in a bay window
A menorah in the neibors window stands
Lit by a childs small hands
All up and down the street
Th holiday spirits of people meet
For this time of the year
Is all about spreading good cheer

There is no difference between reality and imagination. At least not in imagination, just in reality.

Brilliant, no?

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss

From: [I put the fun in funeral]'s house

Used To Have Super Human Powers, But My Therapist Took Them Away :(

When I Can't Sleep, I Count The Number Of Buckles On My Straight Jacket

Even more random stuff stolen from anotehr persons house...


[ALTER_EGO]
My whole life i'v been runing away...It's time for me to stop...But where???



All that is gold doesn't glitter, not all who wander are lost...



-That which doesn't kill you, makes you stronger. ~


-I'm not crazy, my reality is just different then yours


-Life is too short... so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly, and forgive quickly.



-In the beginning, there was nothing, and it exploded... tell me what's wrong with this picture? ~Seems to be everywhere now days, no?


***Sometimes I wonder if I died, how many people would care. How much would it effect those around me if one day, I was gone?***

He... poems to friends are nice
found this in [BuBbLyBlOnDe]'s house

I tried to think of all the ways you've made me smile...
...then I realized there were too many to count,
I tried to count how many heartbeats I have per minute when your around...
...I lost count around two-hundred something,
I tried to point out a star for every way I love you...
...but I kinda ran outta sky.
I thought to myself, 'hm, why does it figure that when you came into my life, I run out of things to compare you to?'
...then I realized, you're too good to compare
I believe in angels,
the kind that heaven sends
...I'm surrounded
By angels, but I call
Them my best friends