OMG! I remember what i was going to say... Yesterday while i was groaning and being ill in my bed, one of the paramedics from BOA rang XD XD They wanted to check that me and Alex were ok and that we made it home safe! I found it the funniest thing ever that they rang XD It was so sweet though X3 Bless their little cotton socks! Awww X3 That made my year, that did! Anyway, that's all i have to say XD

Mood:

Weeeeell.. I'm very annoyed today =___= due to the fact that all my friends will be getting their GCSE results today.. And i can't because i'm forbidden from leaving the house >___< Mutti has rang the school and they're going to mail my results, but i don't know when i'm going to get them.. So in other words, everyone else will be celebrating/mourning their results, and i'll still be gnawing my fingers off waiting for mine *grumbles* it's a good thing im not actually all that nervous about them XD My thoughts on the matter are.. I know i've done badly. How do i know this? Well... I screwed up the last 2 years of high school really badly. I know i did, and i know it's my fault and that i'm the only one who can be blamed for it. I'm willing to accept that. I also know that i didn't work as hard as i could have for my GCSE's. Infact, i did the absolute minimum. Therefore i'm expecting D's and C's in everything and i've geared myself up for the worst case scenario. At the end of the day, it's just another lesson for me to learn from. If i get bad results, it'll be a kick in the head for me and it'll make me want to work harder for my A levels so i do actually get some fairly decent grades. If, by some miracle, i manage to get good results then.. I guess it'll be a sort of confidence boost. Like "look what you can do without working. Imagine what you could do if you put your mind to it." So either way something good is going to come out of it. I know i'm going to get an earful from my mum no matter what results i get, because she won't be satisfied with anything lower than an A =___= It's lucky i don't cave in under pressure or i'd be a nervous wreck by now. Honestly, she's threatened to throw me out of the house if i have a single C. That's overreacting i think. Whatever. What's done is done, i can't change them now. I just hope they show up tomorrow, at least that will be one less thing for me to worry about.

Now, moving away from the subject of my exams... I'm over the worst of this glandular fever i think ^__^ I can actually speak now and swallowing isn't as painful as it was. It still feels like i've swallowed a crate of very pissed off scorpions, but it's not as bad as it was yesterday. Come on immune system! Fight like you've never fought before! XD Oooh, i ate some fish yesterday! Ok, that doesn't sound like much, but i was very pleased XD I've lost so much weight.. What with eating next to nothing at BOA then coming back and having glandular fever and thusly not being able to eat... I've lost a stone already... I have an issue where if i stop eating, my weight drops really fast. I'm 8 stone now, and i'm trying to eat a bit more because if anything that's a little underweight for someone of my height <_< >_> I want to get it to at least 8 and a half and then i'll be satisfied XD

Anyway, enough about my weight, it's not a particularly interesting topic and not one i really want to spend ages rambling about... What else did i want to talk about? There was something else... OMG my arm is beginning to sieze up, maybe i'm typing too fast o_O XD Aaaah, i can't think of anything else of worth to say now, so i think i'm going to go and walk my dog.. I need some fresh air, i've been confined to the house for days, i'm beginning to look like a starved vampire XD Toodles!

</ramble>

Mood:

I just got back from the doctors. I have glandular fever. Glandular fucking fever. I can't speak, which is hell for someone as talkative as me. I can't eat, which is even more hell as i happen to love eating. I'm not allowed alcohol (i like how that was the first thing the doctor pointed out) dairy products or any solid food for a week. A WEEK!!! Ok, alcohol i can just about live without.. Dairy products, same story (the Milk Maid is temporarily going into hybernation).. But no solid food?!?! That's just so cruel!! Why do you do it to me, God?! Well i know full well why i've got this fooking thing. I'm blaming Bloodstock, large amounts of alcohol and too many guys. Glandular fever is also known as the kissing disease. Oh joy, now i have to put up with weeks of my parents taunting me because i have the fooking kissing disease >___< I really REALLY want to eat something.. I refuse to live off fruit juice and soup for the next week. I might have a boil in the bag fish thingy... Fish is squishy, it won't do too much damage, right? Grrrrrrrr. I need to find out who is responsible for giving me this, and i need to kill them. Yes. I'm going to eat some ham, no solid foods be damned. Pfffft.

</ramble>

Nuuuu >___< Bloodstock has killed me! DEAD!!! Dear God... I feel like shit today... No, worse than that, i feel like a big splat of cow shit that's been cooking on asparagus in the desert for a week!!! YES! I have the worlds worst sore throat, seriously... I can't speak at all, it's agony to swallow and if i cough or even clear my throat i get a mouthful of blood! Hoorah! I'm also shaking from head to foot, aching all over and my back is almost as bad as it was when i first hurt it >___< This is like the belated hangover from hell!!! GAH!! And to top all that off, i'm missing everyone from BOA ;__; I know it's stupid, since i only knew them for 4 days, but they were all so cool and i really just want to go back and live there >__< So basically today i'm on a real downer... Soooo, if i snap at anyone in messages or if im bitchy or anything i apologise in advance... Grrrr...

Aaanyway... I don't really have anything useful to say now... I found my old gameboy, the ones that they don't even make anymore, and i'm playing pokemon XD The damn thing is practically an antique now XD Gaaaaah, i'm having another shivering fit, i can't type properly now XD It's taking me about a million attempts to type each fecking word.. I'm just going to stop talking now..

</ramble>

Roite, i shall now attempt to talk about Bloodstock in a slightly sane and un-drunk manner. I apologise for any spelling mistakes, insane rambling, pirate phrases and general stupidity in advance, because i'm pretty sure all of the above will happen at some point due to the fact that i think there's a possibility that i'm still slightly drunk. I must also point out that due to the fact that i was drunk for 90% of the festival, i don't remember everything and what i do remember will be in the wrong order. I have just decided to divide this into days, just to make it easier.

Day One

NOW, where to begin? Well.. We arrived alright, sane and sober and looking for somewhere to pitch our tent. After much struggling, yelling and frustration we managed to get the bastard thing up and tent-shaped (if a bit lop-sided) and we were indeed happy. Then the alcohol came out and we went on our mission to conquer the campsite, find our way around and make friends with everyone. We first discovered the toilets. They were rank on the first day, and i don't even want to begin describing what they were like by sunday morning XD Aaaanyway, after finding the toilets we had to re-find our tent, which is harder than you might think XD After re-finding it we started on the friend making. We made friends with... Oh shit, now i've got to try and remember all their names XD Frankie, Rory, Fred, Ross, the other two who were with Fred and Ross, and the other guy who was with Frankie and Rory XD Yeah. We started drinking and dancing to Korpiklaani with those guys, and it was good. Stuff gets a wee bit fuzzy after this.. We went to see a band, i can't for the life of me remember who it was though XD Oh God, my memory gets even worse after this because this was the point i got off the beer and cider and got on to the Jagermeister and JD... Aye, i believe this was the point i met Pete.. Because he was the one who was buying me all the Jagermeister and JD XD he apparently spent over £40 on me getting me alcohol and doughnuts o_O that was rather nice of him XD i wandered around getting pissed with him and then met the wonderful Commodore and his girlfriend the Wench (or Ruth). They gave me more doughnuts and i nicked the Commodore's fucking awesome hat. We then re-found Alex and went wandering off around the campsite until we found a gazebo and sat under it. More beer was found, and i was convinced that i could smell blueberry muffins and asked every single person i met if they had any XD Um... we went to bed... Alex wandered off again after about 2 minutes, so i buggered off aswell and met a guy who i think was called Phil, who gave me 10 Jager shooters and told me to be a happy little boozer.. So i drank them all in about 3 seconds and ran off XD I met some Irish people who had rum and vodka and decided that i was their new friend o_O I drank ALOT of rum and don't remember much after that except crawling over to the Shauns (a bunch of guys who we met because they kept yelling Merry Christmas at us.. I'll explain later) and insisting that i was sober despite the fact that i couldn't stand. Lazy Shaun then helped me back to my tent, which was very nice of him, and i crashed. I woke up an hour later to discover that there was a stranger sleeping in our porch o_O Alex punched him in the face when he tried to crawl back in to the tent and i nearly stood on his face when i got out of the tent to go and piss. He'd gone when i came back so feck it, i don't know who the hell he was.. But this is day 2!

Day Two

ROITE! This bit is going to be considerably shorter than Day One, due to the fact that i remember very little of it.. woke up, started drinking straight away and then had one of the most trippy experiences of my life. We went to see Fred and co, and found them sitting outside their tents, drinking out of tea cups, eating scones and listening to Mozart. It was quite possibly the funniest thing i've ever seen (or it was at the time).. After that.. what happened after that? OH YES!! We went to watch bands! Wolf, who were awesome as far as i remeber.. but the highlight of the day was Korpiklaani! My god i'm in love with that band. I yelled at the frontman to get me a beer, and he fucking did and all!! He went backstage and got me a beer, which he threw at me XD This girl then decided to try and fight me for it, and we ended up ripping it in half. I completely shredded my fingers and we had to go to the paramedics. I smeared blood on my face war-paint style and i was giggling like a maniac. The scene went as follows (well, this is close to what happened.. we must remember that i was pissed off my face at this point):

Me: GIMME A PLASTER! I'M BLEEDING ALOT!!
Paramedic: You'll have to come in, you're covered in blood.
Me: No i'm not, give me a plaster.
Paremedic: Look, just come in so we can clean you up and give you plasters.
Me: Fine.. *grumbling walks in to the paramedics van-thing*
Paramedic: ...Your hands are shredded, what did you do?
Me: I had a fight with a beer can! *brandishes half a beer can*
Paramedic: ...You need stitches in this finger, it's really deep.
Me: No, no, it's fine, give me a plaster so i can go and get plastered! *laughs insanely at bad pun*
Paramedic: Shut up and sit still so i can put stitches in your finger. *pulls out massive scissors*
Me: SHIT! *closes eyes* tell me when you're done..
Paramedic: Done, you can go now.
Me: YAY! *falls out of paramedics van and wanders off with Alex*

..So yeah, i got myself stitches and 18 pretty nasty slice wounds all over my hands. BUT IT WAS SO FUCKING WORTH IT!!! I don't remember much after that.. It got dark, we went to some random guys camp-site.. Umm.. Someone gave me three tabs of E which i thought were smints XD XD I took them and i was naturally pretty fucked for the rest of the night. We went to a pirate party where i met Mr. Wiggles and became his wench. He ended up having to take me to the paramedics van (again) because i was so fucked up from the E.. Me and Alex both went to the medics van and the guys in there were so nice! Me and Wiggles sat out in the back and i spent half an hour trying to explain that wench is different from girlfriend. Then the paramedics decided to convince Alex that she was on a heroin trip by asking me loads of stuff about her family and then reeling it off to her like they knew everything about her. I was pissing myself laughing, it was so funny. Then we pretended that i'd fallen out of a van and had 26 stitches up my leg, which Alex believed XD We then went back to the pirate party, but Wiggles ended up having to take Alex back to the medics van because she was so fucked. I slept in Wiggle's tent that night, and to be fair to him he was very sweet and looked after me instead of taking the opportunity to rape me XD Then what happened? Fuck a monkey, i don't even remember... Ah yes, day 3 began! XD

Day Three

Well.. i woke up at 7 and discovered that my top had come off at some point during the night.. At the time i was still drunk so didn't care, so i got out of the tent and wandered off to the toilets in just my bra. I thought about going to pick Alex up from the medics, but decided that she'd still be asleep. I think i went back to Wiggles' tent via the Shauns. Have i explained about the Shauns yet? Well i'll do it anyway.. They were a bunch of guys who were completely drunk. If you were their friend you were a Shaun, if not you were a Steve. Everyone had their own special Shaun name. There was Drunk Shaun, Lazy Shaun, Sleeping Shaun, Ginger Shaun... I was Purple Shaun and Alex was Pink Shaun (due to the colours of our furry hats XD) Aaaanyway, i visited the Shauns and got some beer off Drunk Shaun, then headed back to Wiggles' tent. I got up again at 8 and i remember Wiggles saying "Don't become a stranger now.." which i found hysterical at the time. I put on a jacket and said i'd be back for my top once i'd found Alex. I found Alex litter picking and decided to join in for the hell of it. After 2 hours of that.. Well i'd got my top back, so i apparently went back to Wiggles' tent at some point... But me and Alex got backstage! We went for brunch (which was curry) with our new friends, the 'Picker Lickers'! After brunch and coffee, we got dinner tickets and told to come backstage again at 5 to have dinner with Rise to Addiction!!! HOW AWESOME IS THAT?! So we returned to the pirate camp for about 2 minutes so i could get my hat and bandana, and then we met Metal Al who was awesome! He had trashed a bunch of tents around ours and we stopped him from trashing ours then wandered off again. Everything after this is a bit blurry, despite the fact that we were staying sober this day.. Umm... We watched a few bands, then wandered back stage again to use the toilets. They were nice toilets, with carpets and real flushers and a flower and everything!!! Then some guy thought we were in/with one of the bands XD Aaah man that was funny.. some guy let me and Alex up on the stage, which was awesome! Ummm... Some stuff happened o_O We got free ice cream because we begged XD then we went for a cup of tea with our paramedic friends, who i love to bits! They were so awesome, all of them! The most unprofessional paramedics i've ever met, but awesome all the same! Gaaaah, i can't remember what happened next.. we found some guys who were covering potatoes in squirty cream and chucking them about, so me and Alex got some and from that came the greatest quote of Bloodstock "Y'arr! We be taking our creamy potatoes elsewhere!" xD xD xD funniest thing ever!! Then we went back to our camp and re-found metal al, who was trashing his own tent XD Not sure what happened, but Xavier ended up wearing the tent and running blindly at a bunch of people, which was insanely funny XD Another amazing quote came from this..

Al: where's my tent?
Xavier: It's fucked..
Al: Well, un fuck it for me!!

XD Quite possibly the funniest thing i've ever heard. Gawd i've been attempting to finish this for hours now XD i keep getting distracted.. Basically, in a nutshell, what happened after this was: We went to see Arch Enemy (who kicked butt. Angela Gossow is a legend, she be hardcore! If i was male, i'd go after her XD) and In Flames (who kicked even more butt!! I caught a load of their picks in my bra! \m/) Between Arch Enemy and In Flames some of the funniest things ever said were said. The Milk Maid (AKA - me in super hero form) got a few new powers, Aerubics and rubics were created, there was talk of wine and boats and much innuendo about Rubiks cubes. Alex fell over several times, which was hilarious, and then we got killed during In Flames. THEN we went to a party and got drunk again, even though we vowed to stay sober. Then we got into a mob.. Or maybe the mob came first.. I can't remember, but we went on a march around the campsite and burnt a bin. Then we met Metal Al again and me and Alex got married.. THEN we went back to the pirates camp and i ended up sleeping in Wiggles' tent AGAIN. Alex got up when the sun came up, went back to our tent, imagined packing it up and put all our clothes in a puddle (so fucking funny XD).

Day Four

We woke up in Wiggles' tent, and had a total downer where i was very upset because we were going home. Then, after recovering from my bout of depression, me and Alex both went into a state of utter hysteria and spent half an hour trying to motivate ourselves to get out of Wiggles' tent and go and get our stuff packed. We couldn't stop laughing and it was extremely funny. We discovered that Wiggles was actually called James, and then finally left his tent and went to get our stuff packed. To cut a long story a little shorter, we packed our stuff and went home!

And that ladies and gentlemen be Bloodstock Open Air, the best festival ever created by anyone! I've probably missed alot, but i feel this rant is long enough as it is XD That be all! I'm now going to kill my mother because she's already yelling at me about this and that. BAI!!!

</extremely long ramble>

ROFL!!!!!!! METAL AL HAS A VIDEO UP ON YOUTUBE XD XD XD THAT IS THE FUNNIEST THING SINCE FUNNY!!! ONLY ALEX WILL GET WHY, BUT... Y'ARR, IT BE GOOD!!!

^{I'll rant about bloodstock later btw, then y'all will understand who Metal Al is XD}

Nyaaah T___T I just had to write a really sad scene in my story >___< i got all teared up and now i'm like 'Nuuuu, i don't want him to die anymore!!!' ...buuut, it's part of the plot and i can't just bring him back to life because i like him XD He will live on in my mind... Who is he? Well, you'll have to read it. And no one is reading it until it's finished. So ha. Bah. Stupid characters that i get too attached to *headdesk headdesk*
</short ramble>

ABSATHIOEWJFAIOWMFRIOAHTA. MRGFEOAISCPEOWAGPKRTMAESCREACR. JFEWOIAMCEIWATHNRAMCEWKLAG. *composes self* BLOODSTOCK ON THURSDAY!!! I can't freaking wait, it's gonna be so great. Mum has stopped spazzing since i've pretty much finished my room, so she's going to buy us alcohol and food and pick us up after the insanity. I love festivals. LOVE. Yeah. I've been listening to In Flames on repeat all day, and i love them more than i did when i saw them live last year. AND I'LL BE SEEING THEM AGAIN ON FRIDAY!!! FUCKING YES!!! I hope i actually die in the pit, that would be the best way to go.. Death by moshing to In Flames. Perfect. Yeeeah... No i actually do want to live to see the end of BOA. Then i'll be quite happy to die in my sleep when i get home XD Maaaaaaan, i'm so hyped now it's unbelievable. I have 3 custom T's to last me for the three days XD One says 'ATTENTION DUELISTS!!! MY HAIR IS ASSAULTING YOU!!!' (most people won't get this) one says 'Everyone shut up and pay attention to me' (It's a Rik Mayall quote <333) and the last one says 'Everyone should have something to believe in. I believe i'll have another beer.' So yeeeeah, gonna be good with my t-shirts and my noodles XD XD Seriously nearly pissing myself from excitement, it's going to be even more amazing than Download. I'm determined to make it so. To prove that metal beats emo any day. YEAH!

Aaanyway, moving away from my insane ranting about Bloodstock... I had the most odd dream last night... I was in the cinema, and for some reason i was with the Bratz, and we were having a dance off by the pop-corn counter. I fell over and sprained my ankle or something and we were all like 'oh fuck it, let's go and get back on the bus.' so we walked outside and there were loads of army guys marching about and these massive armoured buses. (please take note that i was convinced that this was actually happening.)I was with Tom Fury (a guy from my school) and we were talking about fighter jets (a topic which i know nothing about) and walking to the bus. He was on a different bus from me so i got on mine and found Alex. We went to a department store and we were looking for corned beef when we bumped into this guy with white blonde hair and red eyes. We started talking to him and he told us he was the spawn of Sasuke and Ino, and me and Alex ran away from him and ran out of the store and back on to the bus. Then it just all blurred away and re-blurred somewhere else, and i was in the middle of a desert. It took me a while to realise i was a bird. Itachi and Kisame (yeah, sad i know) were walking through the desert, and for some reason Kisame couldn't mention the word hungry to Itachi. Itachi's stomach growled really loud and Kisame went "are you hung-" and Itachi glared at him. Then he went "are you starv-" glare "Are you raveno-" glare "...Are you fami-" glare. ".....Are you served with radishes?" and then it all faded away again (yeah, Kisame asked Itachi if he was served with radishes. I don't get it either.) and i was standing with my OC Akayuu on a big cliff that was over complete blackness. I was ranting about not knowing where i'm going with the plot of my story, and how the big black abyss below us symbolised the plot and it's lack of sense. Akayuu just stood there and then went 'you know the solution.' and pushed me off the cliff! I was falling and falling and falling and then.. no i didn't wake up, i landed on a giant pig. THEN i woke up. Sooo... Anyone want to analyse THAT dream?! XD XD My brain comes up with some weird shit when i'm asleep XD Anyone out there who has normal dreams want to trade minds with me for a while?? XD

Anyway.. I think that's all i have to say.. Yeah, nothing else useful to add, i'm off now to finish my room ^__^ toodles!

</ramble>

Hoorah, i have finally managed to reply to all my messages XD Took me a while, but i got there, and i'm not going to let them pile up like that again (haha, 2 weeks and it'll be exactly the same <_< >_>)

Aaanyway. Last night there was a meteor shower! I thought i was going bonkers to be honest because i didn't know there was one.. So when i saw the first meteor i was like 'ah, shooting star! Make a wish X3' ..But after the 10th i was starting to think i was seeing things XD Then i thought the world might be coming to an end, then i got all hyped up and i was looking for a huge comet XD When i'd established that it was just a meteor shower and that the world wasn't coming to an end, i went to bed XD But it was very pretty, i only wish i could have got some photo's. Alas, my camera is too crap XD

I've just been talking to my cousin and i'm soooo freaking jealous of him. He's getting two dogs, but not only that, he's getting two SALUKI'S. I absolutely LOVE Saluki's, they're my favourite dog breed (alongside siberian Huskies) so i am currently greeeen with jealousy because i want one >_< unfortunately my garden is too small, as is my house, to have such a big and energetic dog XD But.. GAH! i'm getting one as soon as i have a garden of reasonable size!!!! Stupid cousin... He said he was going to get a pair of greyhounds but then his girlfriend spied a Saluki online somewhere and demanded that they get a pair of them instead. DAMN THAT STUPID WOMAN SHOULD HAVE KEPT HER MOUTH SHUT!!! *breathes* I wouldn't be so jealous if it were just greyhounds, but Saluki's *whimpers* i will have to dognap them, it's my only option XD

Anyway, enough about dogs. Umm.. Did i have anything else i wanted to mention? No i don't think i did... Well in that case i'll bid y'all fairwell!

</ramble>

Nyeeeh, changed my mind, i'm too tired to go through 21 messages.. it's 3:20am i should've been in bed hours ago.. and i shouldn't be on my diary yattering away about how i can't be bothered replying to my messages. So here are generic replies to all the possible messages i can think of that might be in my inbox:
- Hi ^_^
- I'm fine thanks, yourself?
- I don't know, the sky?
- Why thank you ^_^
- *hugs*
- *huggleglompsmoosh* ^3^
- Really?
- Oh dear...
- O RLY?!
- No Alex, Theo and Vince are not having children.

...hopefully that should satisfy the people who have messaged me... this is pointless! POINTLESS! i could've replied to half my messages in the time it's taken me to write all this, but i can't keep my eyes open anymore and my conscience is having a war with Vince.. Coscience tells me not to ignore messages, something important might be going on... Vince tells me not to worry about it and go to bed and reply to them at a sensible hour... Vince just killed my conscience, i'm going to bed before i fall asleep at the keyboard... i'll do messages tomorrow *headdesk* bloody procrastinator..

Wheeeee, i'm on a drawing spree at the moment, or as i once called it a 'drawing fernando' (don't ask). It has recently occured to me that my style when it comes to drawing humans is slowly drifting away from anime and manga style.. I no longer draw people with big googly eyes and compacted heads and ridiculously pointed chins.. i suppose i'm just looking at alot of art, absorbing different styles and mingling them together to make a style all my own X3 Many people's art has influenced me.. Emily, i have borrowed and adapted her style of drawing ears XD.. Rynnay, i have learned LOADS from her about facial expressions and the correct way to draw faces... Demi and Jack from Sheezy have taught me how to get human proprtions right XD and Jack has also helped me with hands which i usually have many problems with! My style is basically a mixture of the styles of every single artist i know, combined with a bit of Beki she-bam, then splurged out of a cat's nose and onto the paper and there you go BEKI-STYLE! So yeah, i like my new style and i'm sticking with it ^_^

Other than that, i've filled in a few more plot holes on the unnamed story with Vince, Theo, Kat, Davey and Pabs..And [Lexi. Short and Sweet!] is trying to convince me to make Zekkou canon, which is impossible as he is the son of two males and is just a random sort of omake character that will never exist in the story. And even if somehow it was possible, Vince is 12 years older than Theo and Zekkou is currently 17.. That means in order for it to happen, Vince and Theo would have had to.. spawn.. Zekky when Vince was 18 and Theo was 6.. Thus making Vince a pedo whatever way you look at it.. So yeah, not gonna happen. Plus, Theo and Vince didn't even MEET until Theo was 15, so unless Vince and Theo managed to breed from opposite ends of the galaxy, it's impossible. THERE! I win.
Anyway, enough of that i have a bed to be sleeping in and a collection of messages that i've been ignoring to reply too.. Sorry if anyone's messaged me and i haven't replied despite being online.. I LOVE YOU REALLY! I'm just in a really arty mood tonight so i've been neglecting my messages.. and now i feel bad.. *hugs to all the neglected people* sorry! *pootles off to read neglected messages*

</ramble>

YAY! My artistic muse has decided to return from wherever he went and i've been drawing horses all day XD That is all.

Actually, no it's not. I'm realllly hungry, so i'm eating what's left over of my lemon mirangue pie. I feel like i did when i was starving myself only eating a piece of bread every day and being generally moronic.. Just really shaky and light headed and weird. It's horrible, so i'm going to stuff my face now ^__^ The reason i'm so hungry is because i hardly ate anything yesterday because.. i just forgot o_O and today i only ate a necterine so i was starving by dinner time... HOWEVER. Me and my brother were watching Naruto and didn't here mum shouting us for dinner, so when we went downstairs 10 minutes later she had the biggest spazz ever and threw my dinner at me. I sort of stood there like 'do i laugh and walk away or do i completely lose my rag and kill her?' i kind of went for half way between the two and burst out laughing, picked up her dinner and threw it in her face. She threw her drink over me and that was when i actually lost my temper. I was going to throw the chair at her, but i caught myself last minute, put it down and just went to my room. I didn't cry or scream or break things like usual either, i just sat down on the bed, stared into space for a while, went to sleep, got up and went on the computer. It was odd. Either i'm getting alot better at controlling my temper (albeit in weird ways like staring into space and going to sleep) or someone had spiked my drink with sleeping pills o__O whatever. Now i look back on it the whole scene was very funny. That's the reason i didn't eat though, because mum decided to throw my dinner at me, and then i was stubborn so refused to go and get something else. I'm fine now i've eaten something though, so it's all good ^___^ Families are impossible *shakes head*

Aaanyway, all my friends have been away recently, but Alex has finally returned which means alot more spagging around and, of course, alot more drinking. We've also got Bloodstock in a week which i can't freaking wait for!! It's going to be awesome. A weekend of camping, metal music and alcohol. My idea of heaven. It would be perfect if there were some hot guys there too, and judging by what it was like at DL last year, i imagine there will be many of those. And this time i'm single *grins* Aaaaaah, i've just seen Alex's CG pic on her page... and now i really want to CG something =__= I don't really have anything worth colouring though, except maybe that carousel horse i drew about 4 hours ago... But that's kinda depressing XD Oh well, i think i'm gunna go and start CGing that and then hit the hay, cuz i have to get up reasonably early tomorrow so i can have a shower and wash my hair. Argh stuff to do *flails* Buuuut at least both my muses are back now so i can write and draw without having le espasmo and killing everything around me. YAY! So, to round things up.. or off.. whichever makes more sense... Despite having a big argument with mum which resulted in me being extremely hungry, i'm very happy and hyper due to muses returning and Bloodstock in a week. HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY!!!! Mike is coming back from... that place that he went... So i'll be able to talk to him again, and since things have been a bit frosty between us since the Nathan saga, talking to him will be good. Need to inform him that i believe him and that i do actually want to be friends again. If he won't listen to me i'll just beat him up until he does ^_____^ YAY!

Anyway, i'm going now before i get into one of my hyperishly giggly moods. BAI!!!

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Omg i was up soo late last night.. Went to bed at 7am, got up at 11 (which is a miracle in itself). I ranted in Word for AGES, ended up writing something like 16 pages of utter nonsense. I just read it back and it makes... No sense. At all. It's just complete nonsense. A line from it: "Like sometimes you just think 'well what if i did?' and jump in the pool of sharks for the hell of it even though you know you're risking your life big time." .......WHAT. THE. HELL?!?! What was i even talking about?! I had a 2 page ramble about escalators for God's sake... Dear me... Another line: "Chickens can survive without their head. But could they take over the world? That is the question." WHAT?! What does that even... IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ANYTHING!!! My brain was in a seriously weird mood last night.. If i'd transferred my rant in Word to this diary i would probably be carted off to a mad home. Another one: "Cider is dangerous. Proper cider. Because you think you're fine. Then you get up and someone says 'HEY! Let's invade Birmingham!' and you think that's a great idea. Dangerous drink." OMG. I have something severely wrong with me, i don't even remember writing half of it XD XD *sniggers* I should do that more often, it's given me a laugh anyway, and it seems to have gotten rid of my writers block. One of my muses has come back thank God, so i can actually write stuff that isn't meaningless fluff. YAY! Now just to bring back my other muse and remove the artists block and all will be well. Anyway, i have to go and get something to eat now before i die of starvation. Mother dearest has started me on a 'healthy diet' which is basically 'balanced' and involves eating alot of rabbit food that isn't very filling to begin with. So as a result, i'm always hungry =___= But she's right, i do need to lose weight, so diet it is *shakes fist* hooray, sticks of celery and coleslaw for breakfast =_____= I'm dying here, someone come and save me. And bring cake. That is all.

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Baaaaaaaaah... I'm so bored... It's 3:51am, and i should definately be sleeping... But i can't, i'm not tired so there's not much point trying. I'll just end up lying there being frustrated with myself for not being able to sleep, and then getting up and coming back on the computer or going for a walk anyway... So i'll skip that bit and just stay here. I feel like drawing something, but i don't know what to draw... I'm stuck in an artistic slump at the moment. All i seem to be able to do is really quick, scrappy doodles and sketches of random people's faces... I suppose i'm getting some practice in with facial expressions and facial structure and what-not, but i'm starting to bore myself with what i'm drawing *grumbles* I hate it when my brain goes like this. It goes into ultra-spazz mode and refuses to do anything useful. So i end up just sitting and doing nothing all day, or drawing random crappy drawings that end up getting ripped up anyway. I want to write, but i can't, all inspiration has left me. I want to draw decent pictures, but i can't, the artists block is still sitting on my arm making life difficult. My muse seems to have run away to join the circus (which is where he belongs anyway) and i'm just feeling generally down for no adequately explored reason other than that i have forgotten how to draw properly. And for someone like me that is a very depressing thing =___= I've always drawn as an escape, which is often why my drawings are dark and... grrr... Yeah. I have folders upon folders of angsty, depressing art. LIKE A TRADITIONAL EMO CHILD!!!! *boogies* it's just my way of getting stuff off my chest when there's no one around to talk to (like at 4 in the bloody morning)... But since i can't draw and there's currently no one around to talk to, it's making my head feel like a rock... Oh goddamit all, crusher is coming back *headdesk headdesk* PAH! Can you believe that not being able to draw has brought all this on? How pathetic is that. Grrr, i need sleep, i'm just a tired and hormonal artist-in-training who is taking her sudden loss of any kind of artistic ability out on the online diary that suffers enough rantings as it is...


I CAN'T EVEN DRAW A BLOODY STICK FIGURE THAT DOESN'T LOOK DEFORMED!!! *scribbles frantically* hate hate hate hate hate... Wherever my artistic ability (or lack thereof) has gone, i want it to come back NOW. Bugger it all, i'm going to bed. And i'll probably feel much more normal in the morning, and read this through and think "You utter tard. Why were you letting yourself get all flustered about that. Bloody idiot." ...


Hahaha, "He's just a psycho case who sits around talking to imaginary raccoons all day." That's my quote of the day for today. It cheered me up anyway. Can you guess who it's a description of? Bet you can't! It's now 4:02. Sleep time... Argh, but the pretty sun-up thing is juuuust starting to happen. Do i sit up and wait for the sun to come up and be a zombie tomorrow? Or do i go to bed now, miss the sunrise, and be vaguely human tomorrow? Hmmm, decisions decisions... GAAAAAAH my brain is currently set on overdrive. One minute it was in a total spastic slump, now it's buzzing and whirring and coming up with a whole bunch of crap that makes no sense but i feel the need to write it all down anyway. Might turn into a story one day, who knows. Looks like i'm staying up to watch the sunrise. MSWord here i come, lest i destroy my diary by rambling senselessly too much. It gets enough of that as it is. I'm going to stop now. Transferring rambling to MSWord, please wait... 



Transfer complete.

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Hahahaha, Emily has made my day once again by pointing out that Xemnas is an anogram of Mansex XD XD XD (Umm.. Only KH fans will get that.. Yeah..) That made me lol.. I can't believe i didn't notice it before now o___O

Aaaanyway, moving swiftly away from that before i start a long rant about KH.. I'm home alone again which is boring, depressing and relaxing.. Kind of a confusing mixture there :p I like being home alone because i have the house to myself and i can just chill without being nagged incessantly by my olds... But it's also really boring... There's no one to argue with and believe it or not i've actually been enjoying the company of my little brother these last 2 weeks O__O We've found common interests that can keep us amused for hours without any arguing. Naruto Ultimate Ninja (which he is REALLY good at! It's scary, he almost beat me as SAKURA when i was OREO!!! I mean WTF?!) and Yu-Gi-Oh the abridged series. So yeah we've been a lot less argumentative lately which is good. Dad's in another slump and has been in bed since we got back from holidays... My mum and me had a bug thing on holiday, but it wasn't to bad, just made us feel a bit blech for a day.. But my dad caught it, which is bad. I should explain, he has an terminal disease called polymeiositis (say that 5 times fast) which attacks his muscles and immune system... So he has practically no immune system at all, so a common cold can put him in the hospital for 3 weeks.. So yeah, he just suffers more than us when he gets bugs and such. Buuut, he seems to be getting better cuz he's braved the great outdoors today and bogged down to archery (i knew he couldn't resist it for long, he got a new compound bow while we were in Selsey and he's been itching to shoot stuff with it). Mum brother and dog decided to go along too, but i'm under house arrest at the moment due to my room being a mess (again). And thusly, i am home alone, with only our grumpy ass cat as company. And he's outside under the hedge, so he doesn't even count. Bah. My dad has asked me to print off a target for my brother to shoot at with his new BB gun.. But it's such a waste of my precious ink *clings to cartridges* ..Yes, i'm being selfish, but i like my ink and i have to pay for it myself... And as i have no money at the moment due to having to buy a replacement memory card so my brother didn't burn my ps2 out refusing to turn it off... Wasting ink is bad atm... I shall have to start charging them to use the printer, since i pay for the ink XD Yeeeess, like in the library, only i'll charge more. 20p per sheet for b&w printing, 50p per sheet for colour. That isn't too unreasonable <_< >_> Of course, they won't listen to me. They'll just get all shouty and trousery and nag about how they pay for my food and clothes and don't charge me for them... Then they'll use my printer anyway. Pfft. Oh well, it can't be helped XD

Aaah, i'm in a weird mood now, but i'm going to stop rambling and start cleaning so mum doesn't have a nervy spazz when she gets home.. BAI!

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Bah, my mother has gone on another insane cooking rampage.. There's flour everywhere and the kitchen is out of bounds.. I have no idea what she's cooking, but she's been in there for hours so probably lots and lots of cakes and pies.. she does this sometimes =___= parents... Yeah, that's all i wanted to say really, i'm off to play Yakuza now because i'm addicted to it X3 BAI!!

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Dare you meet my family? Hehehe, yeah, holiday photo's.. none of them are especially good, most of them are of either the dogs or the beach XD The camera was kind of boredom relief, and i wasn't bored very often, so there aren't very many good photos.. you do get to see the lawn mower saga though! XD go on, click it, you know you want to <_< >_>

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Okaaaaaaay i suppose i should ramble about my holiday! I don't want to rant for too long because.. Well, no one actually needs to know what i did on my holiday XD Wellll, we went to stay near Wittering, Brackelsham Bay to be more precise. Anyone knows where that is or has ever heard of it before and i'll give you a medal XD We were staying in my uncle Dave's gorgeousissimo bungalo which is a 5 second walk away from the beach (while he and my Aunty Anne are staying in their second house in France the lucky buggers). Anyway the car journey there was HORRIBLE. We started driving at 4am, i couldn't sleep and by 6am i was feeling very sick. At 7am we stopped at the services and had paaaaaancakes for breakfast, which did make me feel better XD We got in to Wittering at 9am and went to Tesco ffs!!! I was in my bloody pajamas and mum made me get out and buy stuff with her!!! I was like 'Mother, i want to go to bed, i haven't slept for 24 hours, bog off...' but i still ended up standing at the checkout with my hair standing on end, in my pajamas, trying to convince the man that i hadn't escaped from the asylum and that i just wanted some milk... Aaaanyway, then after we'd got ourselves decent we went to see my nan. Bedlam as always. Nan was just rambling on like a lunatic as she does, Sue (my auntie) was yelling her head off as she does, Dave (auntie's boyfriend) was acting like a drunk with my dad, and Alfie and Skye were both mugging my brother. I was the one sitting in a corner with a cup of tea pretending i didn't know any of them XD My nan is a wazzock, she really is. She falls over ALL THE TIME. Me and Sue were taking the pee out of her because she seems to have made it her mission to fall over in every city in the country. We were all talking and reminiscing as you do when you don't see someone for over a year, and EVERYONE said 'oh, you're hair's pink!' ...I always just want to say 'OMG, NO REALLLY????!?! IT'S MEANT TO BE BLONDE, WELL BUGGER ME!!!!' But i have to try and be civil. God knows when we go down there i'm the only one who even makes the effort to be civil. The weather was just.. Gwaaaah.. It was blisteringly hot, so we went into Chichester. That was a grand idea. Ended up sitting outside a pub drinking cider and eating sushi XD We went to a medieval day thing too.. I can't remember what order all this happened in... And once again it was so hot that we ended up sitting in a pub drinking and eating and being generally british. I had gammon and chips *thumbs up* ...Now i think about it, we went to a pub EVERY SINGLE BLOODY DAY. Hahaha, that amuses me. Every day we went to do something, and every day we ended up sitting in a pub drinking cider and having a pub lunch. I love my family sometimes XD We went to a proper old cider house and i had some scrumpy! Scrumpy is REEEEAL cider. It's cloudy, it's brewed in enormous barrels, and it has a rummy taste to it. It's also one of the most dangerous drinks in the world. Because it's cider, you drink it in pints, because cider isn't strong or anything, so you thing you're fine. One pint, no problem. Until you try to stand up and walk away. That's the moment you realise that the top half of your body knows where it's going, but the bottom doesn't. You fall over like a wally basically, it's great. I wanted to get some for Alex, but they didn't sell the strong stuff, so i got her some mild scrumpy, freshly brewed that day. Loveley stuff it is too, i had a bottle for myself! Anyway, enough about pubs and alcahol for the minute... Me and my bro spent allot of time on the beach, looking for fossils and sharks teeth and the like. The weather was right for it, so why not. Anyway, brother proved that he is a true Johnson. How did he do this? He somehow managed to fall in the sea. Yes. The sea. And he didn't just do that "*splash* oh i have a wet bum" somehow, he managed to fall in and get drenched, head to foot, and half way out of the bay by the time we could drag him out of the water. This is what my family is like. Another example of retardedness. My nan: set fire to her handbag in the cinema. HOW DO YOU DO THAT?! In the cinema?! It runs in the family, it really does. Dear me... Oooh, on Wednesday we went out to the Spotted Horse (it's a pub, surprise surprise) for a meal. It was HILARIOUS. I spent pretty much the whole time laughing my ass off. We were there for near on 4 hours and the owner couldn't wait to get rid of us XD We were all talking about smoking and Dave told me how when he was a teenager they ripped up his mums lino in the kitchen, cut it into little pieces and smoked it. That made me crack up, i couldn't understand what on earth inspired him to smoke lino XD Nutcase. Clearly being influenced by Sue, who incidentally has the loudest laugh in the history of mankind. OOOH! We went go-karting to, which was great fun. My brother, genius that he is, managed to crash into the tyre barrier, but not only that, he managed to go right UNDER the bloody thing and out the other side. I nearly wet myself laughing, it was so funny. Aaaah, this is turning into a longer rant than i intended it too... Bloody hell... I have alot more to rant about too >__< I'm sure no one wants to hear any of this anyway, so i'll stop now and just rant about it more later when i feel like it... I want to live down there though, my family are all bonkers down that end of the country. Must be the sea air :p Night night!

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I'M BACK FROM HOLIDAY BUT ONCE AGAIN IN A STUPID RUSH!!! TV HAS BLOWN UP AND I HAVE TO FIX IT BECAUSE IM THE ONLY ONE IN THE HOUSE WHO IS CAPABLE OF PLUGGING A FEW THINGS IN THE RIGHT PLACE WITHOUT BLOWING MYSELF UP!!!!! I'LL RANT ABOUT THE HOLIDAY LATER!!! BAI!!!

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