Omg. On the bus:

Annoying little kid: Do you worship the devil?
Me: *trying to listen to music* wtf?
Kid: Do you?
Me: No i don't.
Kid: What about satan?
Me:... They're the same thing douchebag...
Kid: ...I worship Lucifer.
Me: Really. How wonderful for you. *puts earphones back in*
Kid: You must believe in God then.
Me: Well so must you, if you worship Lucifer.
Kid: LOL no God doesn't exist.
Me: ...Lucifer is part of God's story dumbfuck.. You can't believe in one and not the other. Your logic is flawed now leave me alone.
Kid: *sulks off*

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!! I just hate these annoying little kids who think they worship the 'devil' and 'lucifer' and whatever other stupid names there are for him without actually knowing what the hell they're talking about! Lucifer was one of God's fallen angels, therefore to worship him, you must believe that God exists! Otherwise Lucifer is just a faceless entity with no story or usefulness other than to make little children sound cool because they know what a freaking pentagram looks like! And the pentagram has FECK ALL to do with devil worship and is actually a peaceful Pagan and Wiccan elemental symbol that is about as evil as a dead haddock! GRRR! I just wish these little pillocks would get their facts right before they start rambling on about how they worship the devil.. True 'Satan' worship is basically a form of reverse-christianity... While Christians worship God, Satanists worship Lucifer (aka: Satan). They believe in (and probably hate) the existance of God. They do not sit in circles chanting nonsense and trying to summon abyssal demons. I am by no means saying that i'm a satanist OR a Christian, i'm just saying that these kids deserve to be brutally murdered. With a bible, just for the irony. I'm done now.

</ramble>

Stole this! It amused me X3


1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car),
Gizmo Astra (Mutti's car, not mine)

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie),
Half Baked Blueberry (ROFL XD)


3. YOUR "FLY Guy/Girl" NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)
R-Joh

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal),
Purple Snake (lol XD)


5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Lily St.Asaph (I don't have a middle name, so i'm using the name i almost had as my first name XD)

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)
Sonre (awesome!)

7. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The" + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink),
The Green Jagermeister (ROFL!!!)


8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers),
Pete Donald (lol!)


9. STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy)
Charlie Toffee (Okaaaay then XD)


10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother's & father's middle names ),
Julie William (mum doesn't have a middle name, so i used her first..)


11. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher's last name, a major city that starts with the same letter),
Gregory Glasgow (*snort* that sounds retarded XD)


12. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower).
Summer Foxglove (that's so cool XD)


13. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you're wearing right now + "ie" or "y")
Cherry Socksy (rofl XD)


14. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree),
Coffee Willow (lol XD)


15. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: ("The" + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + "Tour"),
The Drawing Storm Tour (lol, wtf!)

http://youtube.com/watch?v=YB0UZN83N-w

If you love Neil off The Young Ones, you HAVE to watch that video.

If you don't love Neil off The Young Ones, you HAVE to watch that video.

If you don't even know who Neil is... You still HAVE to watch that video.

Neil = <3

^{Vyv, have we got a video??}

=3

Aloha! Well, i be a bit bleh today after the party but.. I can't really be bothered talking about it now... Ok, i can't actually remember all that much of it to be completely honest XD We got there, started drinking, went for a walk, played chicken, band played, i hurt neck, lots of people, socialising, Nathan o_______O, bed... and that's pretty much it... Then i woke up in the morning and started drinking rum... Went to Gemma's with Josh, Toni and Neil appeared, then Terry materialized... So we had a mini-piss up there and made a shit mix that for some unknown reason turned green... Whatever... Aaaanyway. I left my sleeping bag at Gemma's. What a retard. Oh well, it's not actually like i need it for anything. Bah.

Now, on to today.. or this evening to be more precise. I went to Cheshire Oaks with my mutti. We went to Borders, which is what i imagine heaven will be like. Lots of books, lots of coffee and a whole section dedicated to manga and graphic novels X3 I nearly died when mum offered to buy me something, then i was completely torn between books 1 + 2 of Death Note and books 1, 2 + 3 of Gravitation... Until i spotted the complete Kingdom Hearts series box set. I literally squeeled and threw myself at the shelf. A nearby attendant gave me a look, so i calmed down. So yes, i now have the Kingdom Hearts box set, because i'm sad like that X3 anyway... Then we went to the cinema, where i met Laura who i remember talking to last night at the party.. We had a conversation about gay firemen, which was very amusing XD Me and my mum went to see 1408 which was.. Scary. It was one of those films that just totally messes with your brain. Really good film, i highly reccomend it (especially since it's based on a Stephen King novel!!!) Yeeees.. what else did i want to say? Apart from that i completely hate being an English Lit sudent XD it makes me read into absolutely everything.. I'm constantly looking for plot holes, hidden things that you're not supposed to notice and probably aren't even there anyway XD Damn you lit teacher.. damn you... Ah yes, my favourite line from the whole movie:

Manager: He drowned in his chicken soup.
Mike: That... That's hard to do. How did he do that?

XD it was just the way he said 'how did he do that?' that had me in stitches.. aah, you have to see the film, and you probably won't get why i find it so funny anyway... One last quote that is truer than true, then i'm going to bed.

Manager: Do you drink?
Mike: Of course. I just told you i'm a writer.

*nods* all writers are alcoholics. It's true. Now, bed time ^____^ Bai!

</ramble>

Y'arr, tomorrow be talk like a pirate day me hearties! Get in the spirit of things and yell "y'arr" at everyone you see tomorrow! I'm going into school dressed as a pirate, as are a bunch of my friends! We're going to have a crazy day of running around dressed like pirates and yelling y'arr at everyone who comes near us XD I'm fully aware that i'm going to get lots of strange looks and people asking my 'why the fuck are you dressed like a pirate' and then 'omg'ing when i tell them that it's talk like a pirate day.. but fuck them, if they can't get in the spirit of things, then they're not worth my time! XD I'm really looking forward to it actually.. i kinda look like i just rolled out of POTC, rolled through a low budget pirate movie, then rolled into the modern day. A weird mix of cool, cheap and unrealistic all create the look of Captain Elanor Scarr (more commonly known as Wench Y'arr). And it's going to be fun. And i have alcohol XD It's cider, not rum, but it's close enough! XD

</piratey ramble>

Ffs, who knew a tongue could bleed so much o_O about 20 minutes ago i was just sitting at the computer minding my own business, when it occured to me that there was way more liquid in my mouth than there should have been and that it tasted funny. I swallowed it and i was like 'wtf, blood???' so naturally wandered to the bathroom and looked in the mirror to inspect where the blood was coming from.. and all this blood just suddenly started pouring out of my mouth and all over everywhere. I had no idea what was going on so i just stuck my head under the cold tap and stayed there for a while with my mouth open XD The bleeding slowed eventually and i could see that it was my tongue, but it was bleeding for no adequately explored reason, and it just started for no reason. I still can't see a cut or anything, it just looks like a massive graze or something o_O totally weird. But so much blood from such a little space!! XD It was really funny.. and it gives me an excuse to eat lots of ice, which i'm currently failing at cuz i'm chucking it all over the floor... i don't really have anything useful to say now, so i'm going to watch AMV Hell ^___^ toodles!

</ramble of pointlessness>

ABSDAOIFJREOWSINVREWFREKCRUEWGHEOJFEPWQKGGGREJWOIFMRGAFUNK.

I am so booooooooored... There is seriously NOTHING to do in this house.. I've finished all the school work i have to do (what ho?! Beki doing school work?! NEVA!!!!) and i basically can't find anything else useful to do with my time.. I'm half tempted to re-install the sims 2 and play on that for a few hours, but i know i'll get hooked and be up on it till 4am like i used to XD ..Plus re-installing it would mean finding the case and the instruction book ¬___¬ why do they put the stupid serial number on the stupid instruction book where i wont be able to find the stupid thing?!!? >__< they should put it on the actual disc, then i'd have no problems finding it.. Plus plus, if i re-install it then i have to re-download ALL the hacks and mods and extras i had... which is like... a phenominal amount. The game i played was NOTHING like the base game at all XD I had my Naruto world and my medieval world and my 'OMGWTFBBQ' world, where all the freaks and weirdos went.. And everything was all mixed up and retarded because i installed so many hacks.. The rain one amused me the most.. I had a weather hack installed and it randomly decided to rain for something like 48 days.. And there was a power cut EVERY BLOODY DAY. It was funny though XD ..Aaah, why am i ranting about the sims, its making me want to bloody play it... But i caaaan't, because i have no idea where the stupid instruction book is... omfg, i just found Dogz5!!! I forgot i even had that XD XD But once again, no instruction book, and thus no serial number, and thus no installing.. bah.. Rofl, i found Dogwaffle too.. Aaaah, i haven't been on that for yonks.. I've got LOTR, House of the Dead... Some horse riding game.. gawd, i have a whole bunch of games that i've never even bothered to install XD Omfg, there's so much crap in this room, it's no wonder i can't bloody find anything... I'm going to sort through it all and look for TS2 book thingy so i can install it again... Sleepless night here i come XD

</pointless crappy gaming ramble>

Wheee, i have a new printer X3 it's all shiny and black and smexy! It needs a shiny black and smexyful name now... Gaaaaah, i can't think of one. What's shiny, black and smexy? Ummm... I'll get back to you on that one...

Anyway. My printer is boring. And i have to be quick because i have psychology work to do. What did i want to talk about? Oh yes! I went into Chester with my mum and my brother today. My brother had swimming so we dumped him at the leisure center and me and my mum bogged into town. I got a new bandana ^__^ it's pink! I'm starting a bandana and weird hat collection. I was talking to my mum about it. Because my favourite bandana in my collection is the one she gave me, which is like 30-odd years old, and has been to Woodstock and all sorts of concerts and gigs (Bob Dylan and all XD). So i want to get loads of bandanas and hats and hand them down to my son/daughter one day. It'll be like "These ones have been to Bloodstock 6 times. This one got beer poured on it by an irishman at Download 2013. This one's been to Germany 4 times..." etc etc. So yes, that's my plan for life XD Anyway... When we got back to the swimming baths, we discovered that there was a big basketball thing on! I started talking to one of the guys on the basketball team (James) and i ended up meeting the whole team while mutti wandered off in search of my AWOL brother XD It was so scary thoug, because i'm only quite small and all the basketball guys were well over 6'2". There was this black guy from America who was yaddering on in street slang and all the others were agreeing with him and i was like "Wtf, what are you even saying?" XD it was so funny. I'm not in the loop when it comes to basketball slang <_< >_> I can't even see the loop...
So yeah, after i met a bunch of basketballers, we came home... And we just watched LOTR return of the king, which is the most amazing movie ever. Well, one of the most amazing. Me and my brother were pissing ourselves at the end though, over something that wasn't funny at all.

Ethan: It shouldn't be called Lord of the Rings. It should be called Eyebrows Occasion.
Me: Wtf, why?!
Ethan: Because Frodo does this all the way through whenever anything happens *wiggles eyebrows manically*
Me: LOL
Mum: Oh, look at that lovely round house.
Me + Ethan: *ROFL* (literally XD)

Ok, it wasn't really that funny, but i thought it was at the time 8B

Anyway.. I don't think i had anything else useful to say.. so yeah, i'm going to try and install this printer, and then get my psychology thing finished and my english printed off.. then i can go to bed! BAI!

</ramble>

I have discovered something very important today. People on DA like boobage and nakedness. They also like Naruto, KH or Harry Potter slash. This is what you have to do to gain popularity over there. Seriously. Coming up with complex and original characters is easy, GOD. But drawing a picture of someone elses characters making out with eachother takes, like, SO much more talent!!! (NOTE: extreme sarcasm.) ..You know what would be the ultimate popularity gainer? A big ass KH/Naruto/HP crossover, featuring all the female characters running round naked with boobs 10 times the size of their boobs however they were originally drawn and the sudden sprouting of cat ears and tails, all the male characters naked and having a big orgy in the centre of the picture, then a few anthros and cute little kittens dotted around the edges just to satisfy those beastiality lovers. THAT would instantly get you 1000000 page views. People are so shallow *shakes head*

I'm going to bed now.

</ramble>

Bah. I'm bored and there's no one on msn... I have nothing to doooo!!! I'm going to put together a sketch dump since i have alot of sketches to dump... Then i will dump them up on DA XD That is all. BAI!!!

</short and pointless ramble>

I've just realised that i'm using my art project (the AO1 for Mr. T anyway..) as an excuse to take a stab at society XD Oh dear... I cant see Mr. T looking at it, rolling his eyes and walking away XD XD Ah well, it's not my fault i hate society today and want to stab at it in whatever way i can... This time using squirrels and collection plates. Yes.

Ummm... I need to reply to messages at some point <_< >_> i'm so lazy... i'll do it eventually, when i can be bothered...

That's it really...

</short ramble>

Woooo, good day today! I went shopping with my mum in Chester, which never happens so it was nice! We went to Swanky's for brunch, and because i hadn't had breakfast i was starving! So i had a club sandwich and about a million cups of tea XD Then we went to this new shop called Octopus, which is amazing! It's full of crap that you'll never need but just HAVE to buy XD (Areku, we so need to go there next weekend!!!!!!123) I got a really awesome japanese belt and purse to match, and a purple car bag which is just awesome. I'm not allowed any of them until my birthday though, which sucks! I might be able to weasle the bag by saying i don't have any better ones (which is technically true XD).. Then we wandered around some clothes shops and ended up in New Look where mum bought me a new top for no reason. Then Debenhams where i saw these awesome boots for £55 (which was actually a reasonable price considering that they're designer) and decided i was having those. But it's yet another birthday gift (booo!) so i can't have them yet... THEN it was on to the art store where i got £50 worth of art supplies for my AS art projects XD I got a full set of acrylic brushes with a funky brush holder thing, a set of detail brushes, a set of Chinese ink brushes, a pack of pencils, a new set of acrylics, a new set of oil pastels, a canvas pad, an A3 sketch pad, a pastels pad and a new pencil case XD Mr. Taylor will probably wet himself when i go into the class with all my gear.. I feel like a proper art student XD We wandered about a bit more, went for more tea at Swanky's then came home.. Oh no, we went to Broughton and i handed in my CV at New Look and got some Sushi and Bohemian Raspberry ice cream from Tesco... So all in all a good day! XD

I'm tiiiired now though, we've been in Chester from 10 this morning! It's now nearly 4.. I'm shattered! And i still have work to do for art, psychology AND english lit =___= God help those poor people who are taking more than 3 subjects XD So i'm wandering off to do some work on my two art thingies, then i'll probably do Psych and English tomorrow unless i still have some time left this evening... *sigh* I'm in a bad mood with my brother because the little git has scribbled all over my Asda job application form, so i have to go back and get another one which is really annoying... Other than that i've had a good day today! I must rush off like a spazz now though, i've still got so much to do today, it's unreal XD BAI!!

</ramble>

Wooooo, i haven't written in here in a while.. well, a few days.. but that's a while to me XD Aaah.. Where to start? Well, the last thing i wrote about apart from my failure at drawing was [imperfectionist]'s party.. Which was really good! I kinda failed at the no-alcohol rule, but i didn't have much so it's ok.. We slept at [Lexi. Short and Sweet!]'s house, which was the funniest thing ever cuz it was me, Areku and Danny all squished into one little bed.. We went to bed at about 3am but didn't get to sleep until 5 because me and Areku were both tickling Danny and then Areku kept lunging across the bed at me and screaming "SURPRISE BUTTSEX!!!" (kinda inside joke thing.. although it's funny to everyone XD) ..so yeah, sleepless night.. I helped Areku paint her skirting board the next day ^__^

BUT. All that was AGES ago.. Fo SRSLY! It feels like yonks ago... 6th form started on Wednesday! If you're american, 6th form is kinda like a.. mini-college attached to a high school.. that's the best way of discribing it i think XD but anyway.. I'm taking Enlish Lit, Psychology and Art and Design (i'm supposed to be doing resit maths, but i don't know what happened to that XD) and i'm REALLY enjoying it! I get 2 free lessons a day, which is great because i have extra working time if i need it, and it's also a good time to just chill. I love my lessons and my teachers and all the people i'm with in my lessons, and i've made a bunch of new friends! So yeah, all my fears about being in a form with people i didn't like, or not knowing anyone in my classes, or hating my teachers.. They were all stupid and i got really lucky with my form, my classes and my teachers! YAY! Yes, 6th form is kinda ALOT tougher than year 11 though.. but in some ways it's far more relaxed.. I don't feel like i've constantly got someone looming over my shoulder, and i'm more in control of what i'm doing.. and in a way that's motivation for me to work harder! I've just finished a long rant about short term memory and how memory can be altered for Psychology, and i've been doing a bunch of extra work too. Yes, EXTRA, as in we weren't told to do it. And no, i'm not on drugs of any kind. I'm just feeling much more positive about my work now XD I absolutely LOVE psychology, it's such an interesting subject! GAAAAH X3 i feel like such a bloody student o.O Me and [Lexi. Short and Sweet!] have been going for daily coffee's on our lunch break, it's all just so.. studenty! XD but i love it, and i wouldn't go back to being in year 11 if you payed me a million quid to do so. 6th form FTW!

What else did i have to say? That's it i think... I'm going to go and do a little bit on my art AO1 then go to bed i think.. i have to get up early tomorrow to go to Chester with Mutti and get art supplies, fix my phone and hand in my job application at Asda (YES! I get to wear a bright green shirt if i get the job XD XD) ...So.. Yeah, that's all i have to say! BAI!

</ramble>

AAAAAARGH!!!!!!!!

My ability at drawing wolves = PHAIL!!!!

I totally can't draw wolves XD Not even to prove a point!!! *sigh* ..Something new that i need to practice on ¬____¬ bum.

Wtf.

W.T.F.

That's all i have to say. Obviously my brain can't decide whether i'm ill or not. Either that or the antibiotics i'm taking are miracle pills. Whatever, i feel much better today. I can talk almost normally, my throat isn't hurting half as much and i can swallow with little trouble. So on the health side of things i'm feeling good ^__^

On the art side of things... I'm also feeling good! I'm out of my slump, which is great i suppose... But all i seem to be able to draw is these bizarre wolf/dog/guinea pig creatures that i came up with a few nights ago... They're invading my brain with their weirdness, trotting around in there making their own story up! Since i do quite enjoy drawing them, and the style in which i colour them takes little time and even less effort, i'm tempted to turn their story into a sort of comic thing... Just to get them out of my head for a while XD however, with 6th form starting next Wednesday, as well as me hopefully starting work at New Look in Broughton.. I doubt there's going to be much time for weird wolf/dog/guinea pig hybrids... Unless i can some how manipulate them into my A Level art project <_< >_> XD

Yep. What else? Party tomorrow at Danny's! Then sleeping at Alex's. I have been given strict orders not to drink ANY alcohol, because i'm on penicillin... Apparently alcohol + all the drugs i'm on at the moment = Kidney failure and death. So not good XD So no alcohol, little to no dairy stuff, no kissing (damn that rule), no running frantically up and down stairs, no screaming or shouting, no salty foods and not too much food in general... and i should be fine! Dammit, all those rules go against my normal daily lifestyle! Except maybe the running up and down stairs bit XD Bum. Can't wait for this throat thing to clear up so i can get on with being a teenager XD

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway... Far too many A's there. Whatever. I think that's all i had to say... I need to go and have a shower now as my hair is beginning to resemble a birds nest that's just been ravaged by a pack of hungry wolves. Yes. Toodle flip!

</ramble>

Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah...

My throat has completely died again, and i thought it was starting to get better ¬___¬ Once again i can't eat and swallowing is extremely painful. The swelling of my glands is so bad that it's causing a head-splitting-in-half ear ache, which is horrible >_< Went to the doctors AGAIN today.. Saw a different doctor this time, a slightly more sane one (my normal doctor is totally off his rocker. He sits there with his eyes closed grinning like a loon most of the time). She said she's not sure if it's glandular fever becaaaause it got better for a while, then got worse again o_O Sooo, apparently there's a possibility that i have a bacterial infection. Hoorah. I've been given a course of scary-strong antibiotics, which have some nasty side effects, but they do the job of making my life easier. So, my throat doesn't hurt as much and it's slowly getting better, BUT i do have an issue where i nearly faint if i do anything too strenuous.. Bah. I discovered that earlier when i ran up the stairs and nearly passed out when i got to the top. It's actually quite amusing. So i have to take it easy and keep taking all the damned pills and tablets and nasty fecking things that fizz in water and stuff... UGH, i also had a throat swab today, which was a nasty experience. The results of that come through on Monday, so hopefully i'll know what's wrong by then. If all goes well and it IS a bacterial infection, i'll have another 10 days on the antibiotics and it should be all cleared up! If it's not bacterial.. Then i have to go back to the doctors AGAIN for a blood test to check for glandular fever or anything else that it might be... So yeah, i've had a just FABULOUS day in bed today, feeling like i'm dying. But whatever, i know it's gonna get better eventually so i'm just learning to deal with it XD You know what though? My mother is cruel. Too cruel. They were all having smoked salmon for tea, one of my absolute favourite meals. Due to my inability to swallow anything like that, i was having bread and dip ¬___¬ how depressing. AND mum bought home a load of Bueno's from work, which i can't eat. CRUEL I TELL YOU!!!!

Ok, moving away from my boring old throat infection or whatever it is... Umm... I have nothing else useful to say. BAAAAAH!!!! I hate being under house arrest like this, there's nothing to do! Grrr... I'm going to draw stuff.. That's pretty much all i can do at the moment *grumbles*

Oh bloody buggering hell, now i've got the 'Always look on the bright side of life' song stuck in my head. NOT HELPING BRAIN >_< XD aaaand, this is the point where i go into a hysterical giggling fit. I'll just shut up then. Bai!!

</ramble>

I'm in a good mood... GOOD MOOD I TELL YOU!! *shakes fist*

I feel like drawing stuff!!!! What shall i draw? I'm having a bit of a no-brainer today, i can't think of anything to draw.. I will create a new and random species! Then draw lots of that... No that's boring i do it all the time... Nuuuu >___< ...Anyone gots any ideas on what i should draw, do let me know XD I may do a few gift arts for my friends, since i luff them all so much... Meh... I don't know... IDEAS!! Come on, i can't do everything around here! Quickly quickly! *snaps fingers* XD

Aaaah... I'm going to go find my WIP's folder and finish some colouring.. God knows i've been neglecting that folder for long enough XD ART TIME!!!!!!!!!!111ONE11!!!

</ramble>

You know what, it's time for a rant. I've been browsing around houses on EP, and i am getting so sick to bloody death of these people who have 'Music=Life' plastered all over their pages. Now i can put up with the emo photo's, the attention whores, the camera whores, the fakes and phonies and plastics and posers, but this 'OMG music is my life and i would die without it!!!!!!!!!!!11one1!' is so annoying! Music is NOT your life, you do not listen to music 24 hours a day 7 days a week, and even if you did that does NOT mean that you would die without it! Music is great, don't get me wrong, i love it! I go to gigs, i go to festivals, i appreciate good music, but dear God i think i'm human enough to be able to survive without it! If the person is, say, in a band and music is actually what puts the food on their table, then that's fine. But most of these people don't even play an instrument! They just sit alone in their rooms and listen to music and then complain that they have no friends. Well i have a solution to that. Stop trying to be emo and depressed because it's fashionable, and GO OUTSIDE (you know, that place that doesn't have a ROOF) and make some friends and have a laugh! Because at the end of the day, music is great but you can't beat having a bunch of good friends to bum around with! 90% of the time the people who have 'Music is my life and my world' on their pages are self pitying pre-teens with no social life. And usually female (not to be sexist, but they are). They're the kind that cover their page in photo's of themselves and say that they're ugly under EVERY LAST ONE. Grrr, sometimes i just feel like messaging them and saying 'Yes you are.' but i know that would be cruel. Instead i will growl internally and tell them to grow up. Ok, yeah, now i'll have loads of people going 'OMG you can effing talk! You're only 16!' ..Yeah i am, and yeah i'm still an immature little bitch, but i have done so much growing in the last 2 or 3 years (no, i'm not referring to my height) you wouldn't believe it. I USED TO BE one one of those little attention whores. I used to paint my eyes and my wardrobe black and call myself a Goth and say that dark music was my life. Fuck that now. Yeah, i still love my Cradle of Filth and Satyricon, none of that has changed, but i have! That's not the only music i listen to, for one thing! And i now love pink. But whatever... I just sometimes feel like telling these pathetic little girls to open their eyes and see that life isn't all that tough at all! Dear God, you're only a kid for a little while, stop moping and make the most of it while you can! Cuz believe me, it isn't going to last long! I'm starting to realise that now, planning out my life choices, considering colleges and jobs and 6th form. Things are changing for me and it's made me realise that i'm not really that much of a kid anymore.. At heart i am, but every day i'm slowly joining the adult side of the community. God forbid, that's all the world needs, me to be accepted as an adult XD But.. i'm straying off topic... I really feel like screaming to these people that they should try and think about something other than being fashionably depressed, and make the most of their youthfulness (thank you Gai XD) while they still have it!!!!!! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!

I'm going to stop now before i start getting angry and ranting like a loon! It's over, you can now return to your daily lives! :p Bai! <333

</ramble>

My mum just said to me that i have no talent as an artist and i should re-think what to do as a career...

I can't do anything else, art is all i'm good at...

Thanks alot mum, now i really have no idea what to do with myself in the future...

Tesco here i come, i guess...

Jesus, she could've at least told me that years ago before i set my mind on being a bloody graphic designer...

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Hrrmph.. Well i just got my GCSE results aaand they were pretty much what i expected. It was still quite a blow though.. I had a little cry and my dad didn't help. He hasn't even seen them and he's ranting around the house yelling about how i've fucked my life up. *shrugs* i'm pretty much used to that sort of behavior now. I had to laugh when i read my results though, because by some miracle i managed to pass German XD i got a B and everything.. That really amused me, since i failed art! XD Ok, it's not really funny, but i know it's my own fault so i don't see any reason in being depressed about it. Right now, what i want to think about is doing A levels and this time doing a bloody good job of it, not fucking about and deliberately trying to destroy my own life, just for the laughs. So basically, i failed all the subjects im supposed to be good at, and somehow managed to pass all the ones im bad at. Why does my brain make so little sense. I didn't get any F's or E's thank god, B's and C's and a few D's.. Whatever.. It's not good but it's not terrible. It's enough to get me into sixth form and that's all i need. I've changed my plan a little now. Since i managed to pass German on minimal effort and lots of procrastination, i have decided that maybe i'm better at languages than i first thought, so i'm going to take German (OMG it's a sign of the apocalypse, Beki's taking A-Level german O__O) Psychology (BECAUSE I FUCKING PASSED SCIENCE LIKE I SAID I WOULD! BOOYAH!) Art (If they'll let me <_<) and English Literature (because i love English!) ..So that's my plan. German, Psychology, Art (or media maybe) and English. I'm also considering taking a short course in Japanese with a tutour, which would last a year and would come in handy when i go to Japan for my gap year.. Hrrmph.. So despite bad-ish results, i have my plans, i have my eyes open for the first time in 2 years, and i'm ready to fix everything that i've managed to break. I'm good. Now i just have to convince my parents that this is a good idea *grimace* They're both adamant that i'm not going to 6th form. They're trying to get me to enroll in deeside college and resit my GCSE's. But i don't want that. I've got the grades i need to do A-Levels, now i just want to get to school and prove that i can! I just need to sit my mum down and try and have a mature conversation with her. Maybe i'll write her a letter XD A letter can't lose it's temper and start yelling *grins* yes. That's what i'll do. I'll write her a long letter explaining all the stuff. There's been alot of stuff. Now there is no stuff, and i'm ready for another shot at life. WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! I'm in a stupidly good mood considering the circumstances. And my sore throat has pretty much cleared up out of absolutely nowhere, which is a nice surprise XD Ok it still hurts, but whatever i can deal with it! I'm shutting up now! BAI!

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