Brian's Essay: The Room...

In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the
room.. There were no distinguishing features except for the one wall
covered with small index card files. They were like the ones in
libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order.
But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly
endless in either direction, had very different headings. As I drew near
the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read
"Girls I have liked." I opened it and began flipping through the cards.
I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names
written on each one. And then without being told, I knew exactly where I
was.

This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for
my life. Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and
small, in a detail my memory couldn't match. A sense of wonder and
curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly
opening files and exploring their content. Some brought joy and sweet
memories; others a sense of shame and regret so intense that I would
look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching.

A file named "Friends" was next to one marked "Friends I have betrayed."
The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird "Books I Have
Read," "Lies I Have Told," "Comfort I have Given," "Jokes I Have Laughed
at .." Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: "Things I've
yelled at my brothers." Others I couldn't laugh at: "Things I Have Done
in My Anger", "Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents." I
never ceased to be surprised by the contents.

Often there were many more cards than I expected. Sometimes fewer than I
hoped. I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived.
Could it be possible that I had the time in my years to fill each of
these thousands or even millions of cards? But each card confirmed this
truth. Each was written in my own handwriting. Each signed with my
signature.

When I pulled out the file marked "TV Shows I have watched", I realized
the files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed tightly,
and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't found the end of the file. I
shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of shows but more by the
vast time I knew that file represented.

When I came to a file marked "Lustful Thoughts," I felt a chill run
through my body. I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test
its size and drew out a card. I shuddered at its detailed content.

I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded. An almost
animal rage broke on me. One thought dominated my mind: No one must ever
see these cards! No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy
them!" In insane frenzy I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter
now. I had to empty it and burn the cards. But as I took it at one end
and began pounding it on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card.
I became desperate and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as
steel when I tried to tear it.

Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. Leaning
my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying sigh.

And then I saw it.. The title bore "People I Have Shared the Gospel
With." The handle was brighter than those around it, newer, almost
unused. I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three
inches long fell into my hands. I could count the cards it contained on
one hand.

And then the tears came. I began to weep. Sobs so deep that they hurt.
They started in my stomach and shook through me. I fell on my knees and
cried. I cried out of shame, from the overwhelming shame of it all. The
rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must ever,
ever know of this room. I must lock it up and hide the key. But then as
I pushed away the tears, I saw Him.

No, please not Him. Not here. Oh, anyone but Jesus. I watched helplessly
as He began to open the files and read the cards. I couldn't bear to
watch His response. And in the moments I could bring myself to look at
His face, I saw a sorrow deeper than my own.

He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes. Why did He have to read
every one? Finally He turned and looked at me from across the room. He
looked at me with pity in His eyes. But this was a pity that didn't
anger me. I dropped my head, covered my face with my hands and began to
cry again.. He walked over and put His arm around me. He could have said
so many things. But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me.

Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files. Starting at one end
of the room, He took out a file and, one by one, began to sign His name
over mine on each card. "No!" I shouted rushing to Him. All I could find
to say was "No, no," as I pulled the card from Him. His name shouldn't
be on these cards. But there it was, written in red so rich, so dark, so
alive. The name of Jesus covered mine. It was written with His blood. He
gently took the card back. He smiled a sad smile and began to sign the
cards. I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly, but
the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file and walk back
to my side.

He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, "It is finished." I stood
up, and He led me out of the room. There was no lock on its door. There
were still cards to be written.

Every sixty seconds you spend upset, is a minute of happiness you'll never get back ...

Today's Message of the Day is:
Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably, And never regret anything that made you smile.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we should dance...

Remember the Phoenix Dream

Remember the phoenix dream,
and the woman with skin of cream.
Remember how it all began,
with the beautiful, mute woman,
and the phoenix with eyes of fire,
always gazing ever higher.
Both nearest their lives ends.
To each other, they have befriended,
so on the moment the deaths of both,
phoenix and woman together swore oath.
To each other they joined in ash,
within spirit there was no clash.

So it was upon the next dawn,
there truly was a sight to gaze upon.
As a new phoenix is born from the pyre,
within beautiful scarlet eyes lively fire.
Feathers golden pattern fade to red,
crown of copper feathers on her head,
began to shift, shine, and melt,
in its place the most beautiful woman knelt.
Within the fire she had stayed,
outward she gazed with emotion never fade.
Cautiously speaking in beautiful notes,
no doubt emitting from phoenix throat.

"To remember how it all began,
to know what I really am,
yet fear me not, and love me less,
my spirit yearns freedom more than you can guess."

Off we went, celebrating change,
it truly seemed that I'd loved an angel,
as we danced on the surface of the water,
through steam and towards each other.

Celebration cut short, and she flew her own way,
off to her freedom, she had gone away.
Oft' turn to the sky I gaze,
with no regrets still remember those days.
Still return to the lake to dance alone,
surface ripples beneath and she's still gone.

Written by [Aruruen]

No. This doesn't mean I'm gay or lesbo or whatever else.....

"I like a man who grins when he fights." - Winston Churchill.

"Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing." - Abraham Lincoln.

"I'm an idealist without illusions." - John F. Kennedy

I still hear your voice, when you sleep next to me.
I still feel your touch in my dreams.
Forgive me my weakness, but I don't know why.
Without you it's hard to survive.

Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling.
And everytime we kiss I swear I can fly.
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last.
I need you by my side.
Cause everytime we touch, I feel this static.
And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky.
Can't you hear my heart beat so
I can't let you go.
Want you in my life.

Your arms are my castle, your heart is my sky.
They wipe away tears that I cry.
The good and the bad times, we've been through them all.
You make me rise when I fall.

Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling.
And everytime we kiss I swear I can fly.
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last.
I need you by my side.
Cause everytime we touch, I feel this static.
And everytime we kiss, I reach for the sky.
Can't you hear my heart beat so
I can't let you go.
Want you in my life

Cause everytime we touch, I get this feeling.
And everytime we kiss I swear I can fly.
Can't you feel my heart beat fast, I want this to last.
I need you by my side
[Cascada]

Remember:

Amateurs... built the ark.

Professionals... built the Titanic.

this perfectly explains what i mean when i say "I'm a Christian."

Christians - By Maya Angelou

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin'."
I'm whispering "I was lost,
Now I'm found and forgiven."

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need Christ to be my guide.


When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
And need His strength to carry on.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
And need God to clean my mess.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
But, God believes I am worth it.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain.
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.

When I say... "I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner
Who received God's good grace, somehow!

"The Bible will keep you from sin. Sin will keep you from the Bible." ~Dwight L. Moody

"A Thorough knowledge of the Bible is worth more than a college education." ~Theodore Roosevelt

"I feel that a comprehensive study of the Bible is a liberal education for anyone. Neraly all of the great men of our country have been well versed in the teachings of the Bible." ~Fraklin D. Roosevelt

"Every word is written down in heaven, so be careful what you say." ~Hannah Mitchell

"There's a difference between good kids and godly kids." ~Steve Wessing

"The Bible is the greatest benefit which the human race has ever experienced." ~Immanuel Kant

I asked the Lord one day, "How much Do you love me?" He said, "This much," and he spread out his arms and died.

33AD They murdered an innocent man. Jesus Christ died and lived to tell about it.

The New School Prayer

Now I sit me down in school
Where praying is against the rule
For this great nation under God
Finds mention of Him very odd.

If Scripture now the class recites,
It violates the Bill of Rights.
And anytime my head I bow
Becomes a Federal matter now.

Our hair can be purple, orange or green,
That's no offense; it's a freedom scene.
The law is specific, the law is precise.
Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.

For praying in a public hall
Might offend someone with no faith at all
In silence alone we must meditate,
God's name is prohibited by the state.

We're allowed to cuss and dress like freaks,
And pierce our noses, tongues and cheeks.
They've outlawed guns, but FIRST the Bible.
To quote the Good Book makes me liable.

We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,
And the 'unwed daddy,' our Senior King.
It's "inappropriate" to teach right from wrong,
We're taught that such "judgments" do not belong

We can get our condoms and birth controls,
Study witchcraft, vampires and totem poles.
But the Ten Commandments are not allowed,
No word of God must reach this crowd.

It's scary here I must confess,
When chaos reigns the school's a mess.
So, Lord, this silent plea I make:
Should I be shot; My soul please take!
Amen

I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to.

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and plot your revenge.

I hear voices, and they don't like you.

I live in my own little world, but it's ok, they know me there.

If you cant dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

My mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it's gone.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

I tried being normal once…I didn't like it.

Don't cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.

"In the stillness of a moonlit night, the Heavens whisper their secrets to ears that are willing to hear." ~ Stargazers Philosophy

"Don't get mad, get Glad!!!"

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've always imagined.

No sword strikes as deep as the one wielded by a friend.

"It takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies, but a great deal more to you friends." ~Dumbledore~~Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

If your brain were made of chocolate, you wouldn't have enough to fill an M&M.

THE BRICK
A young and successful executive was traveling down a neighborhood street, going a bit too fast in his new Jaguar. He was watching for kids darting out from between parked cars and slowed down when he thought he saw something. As his car passed, no children appeared. Instead, a brick smashed into the Jag's side door! He slammed on the brakes and backed the Jag back to the spot where the brick had been thrown. The angry driver then jumped out of the car, grabbed the nearest kid and pushed him up against a parked car shouting, "What was that all about and who are you? Just what the heck are you doing? That's a new car and that brick you threw is going to cost a lot of money. Why did you do it?" The young boy was apologetic. "Please, mister...please, I'm sorry but I didn't know what else to do," He pleaded. "I threw the brick because no one else would stop..." With tears dripping down his face and off his chin, the youth pointed to a spot just around a parked car. "It's my brother, "he said. "He rolled off the curb and fell out of his wheelchair and I can't lift him up." Now sobbing, the boy asked the stunned executive, "Would you please help me get him back into his wheelchair? He's hurt and he's too heavy for me." Moved beyond words, the driver tried to swallow the rapidly swelling lump in his throat. He hurriedly lifted the handicapped boy back into the wheelchair, then took out a linen handkerchief and dabbed at the fresh scrapes and cuts. A quick look told him everything was going to be okay. "Thank you and may God bless you," the grateful child told the stranger. Too shook up for words, the man simply watched the boy push his wheelchair-bound brother down the sidewalk toward their home. It was a long, slow walk back to the Jaguar. The damage was very noticeable, but the driver never bothered to repair the dented side door. He kept the dent there to remind him of this message: "Don't go through life so fast that someone has to throw a brick at you to get your attention!" God whispers in our souls and speaks to our hearts. Sometimes when we don't have time to listen, He has to throw a brick at us. It's our choice to listen or not.

Thought for the Day:

If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it.
If He had a wallet, your photo would be in it.
He sends you flowers every spring.
He sends you a sunrise every morning Face it, friend - He is crazy about you!
God didn't promise days without pain, laughter without sorrow, sun without rain, but He did promise strength for the day, comfort for the tears, and light for the way.
If you look at what you do not have in life, you don't have anything.If you look at what you have in life, you have everything.
If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
Happy moments, praise God.
Difficult moments, seek God.
Quiet moments, worship God.
Painful moments trust God.
Every moment, thank God.

this is a poem i found and i liked and tought was very true. i am against anthing that makes anyone better or worse than someone. even if it's in school or when i'm shopping IT IS STILL WRONG!!!!!

A white man yells to a black man. "Hey colored boy! You're blockin my view."
The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:
"When I was born I was black,"
"When I grew up I was black,"
"When I'm sick I'm black,"
"When I go in the sun I'm black,"
"When I'm cold I'm black,"
"When I die I'll be black"
"But you sir..."
"When you're born you're pink,"
"When you grow up you're white,"
"When you're sick, you're green,"
"When you go in the sun you turn red,"
"When you're cold you turn blue,"
"And when you die you turn purple."
"And you have the nerve to call me colored?"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this in your house if you are against raciasim

this is some more stuff i found that would be good for more people to see.

A girl and guy were speeding, on a motorcycle, over 90 mph on the road..
Girl: Slow down. I’m scared.
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it’s not. Please, it’s too scary!
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: Fine, I love you. Slow down!
Guy: Now give me a BIG hug.
*Girl hugs him*
Guy: Can you take my helmet off & put it on yourself? It’s bugging me.
(In the paper the next day)
A motorcycle crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it, butonly one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized that his
breaks broke, but he didn’t want to let the girl know. Instead, he had her say she loved
him & felt her hug one last time, then had her wear his helmet so that she would live even
though it meant that he would die.
.*..If you love someone this much put this on your site..*..



[One night a guy & a girl were driving home from the movies. The boy sensed there was something wrong because of the painful silence they shared between them that night. The girl then asked the boy to pull over because she wanted to talk. She told him that her feelings had changed & that it was time to move on. A silent tear slid down his cheek as he slowly reached into his pocket & passed her a folded note. At that moment, a drunk driver was speeding down that very same street. He swerved right into the drivers seat, killing the boy. Miraculously, the girl survived. Remembering the note, she pulled it out & read it. "Without your love, I would die."]




"WHEN A GUYS SAYS HE MISSES YOU !!"
Guy Facts:
-When a guy calls u
he wants to be with you
-When a guy is quiet,
He's listening to you...
-When a guy is not arguing,
He realizes he's wrong
-When a guy says, "I'm fine," after a few minutes,
he means it
-When a guy stares at you,
he thinks you're the most beautiful thing in the world
-When you're laying your head on a guy's chest
he has the world
-When a guy calls you everyday
he is in love
-When a (good) guy say he loves you
he means it
-When a guy says he can't live without you
he's with you till your done
-When a guy says, "I miss you,"
he misses you more than you could have ever missed him or anything else

-Girl facts:
-When a girl is quiet,
millions of things are running through her mind.
-When a girl is not arguing,
she is thinking deeply.
-When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions,
she is wondering how long you will be around.
-When a girl answers, "I'm fine," after a few seconds,
she is not at all fine.
-When a girl stares at you,
she is wondering why you are so wonderful.
-When a girl lays on your chest,
she is wishing for you to be hers forever.
-When a girl calls you everyday,
she is seeking for your attention.
-When a girl wants to see you everyday,
she wants to be pampered.
-When an honest girl says, "Ill love you forever,"
she means it.
-When a girl says that she can't live without you,
she has made up her mind that you are her future.
-When a girl says, "I miss you,"
no one in this world can miss you more than that