[Sideways]'s diary
I can't confront you
I never could do
That which might hurt you,
So try and be cool
When I say
This way is a water slide that
Every day takes you further away,
Be cool.
Say it ain't so!
Your drug
Is a heartbreaker
Say it ain't so!
My love
Is a lifetaker
Dear daddy, I write you
In spite of years of silence
You've cleaned up, found Jesus
Things are good or so I hear
This bottle of Stevens
Awakens ancient feelings
Like father, stepfather
The son is drowning in the flood!
Oh yeah.
Say it ain't so!
Your drug
Is a heartbreaker
Say it ain't so!
My love
Is a lifetaker
Bears, Bald Eagles, and Beer
Colorado Rocky Mountains, September 2015
Just finished season 1 of HBO's True Detective
It is officially the best thing ever filmed. Give Matthew McConaughey absolutely every statue and trophy. Just bring them to the emmy's, hand that crew ALL of them. College film classes could be taught full semester.
"Why True Detective Will Always Be Better than Your Shit Film 101"
Written about Tuesday 2015-07-21
Written: (3412 days ago)
WOOT! And this one isn't gold colored for once!
So my luck with catching shinys continues. Along with Steelix, Fearow, and Pidgeot, now I got a Shiny Dugtrio! Yay!
Just encountered a comedy article that referred to Budweiser as "liquified stale white bread seasoned with cat urine."
This is a perfectly fitting description of Budweiser. Seriously, that stuff is friggin' disgusting.
You keep screaming from the top of your lungs
Mr. Who-gives-a-sh
The podium is all yours, go right ahead
The plastic king of castle polyethylene
Go on! Time to be a good little pig
You're worth it!
When the rug gets pulled out from underneath
Just embrace the fall
Oh, You got spirit, kid! You're number one!
Go on living that farce.
Cause nobody gives a fuck
Who you are.
I'll never have the chance that you got
No, I won't dwell, I'll just accept I'll be
I'll be forgotten
Cause when the rug gets pulled out from underneath
I embrace the fall
Oh, You got spirit, kid! You're number one!
Go on living that farce.
Cause nobody gives a fuck
Who you are.
So why are you crying?
So why are you crying
When you got the world to command!
And when the rug gets pulled out from underneath
Just embrace the fall
Oh, You got spirit, kid! You're number one!
Go on living that farce.
Cause nobody, nobody, nobody, nobody,
Nobody gives a fuck
Nobody gives a fuck
Nobody gives a fuck
Cause nobody gives a fuck
Who you are.
I bleach the sky/Every night
Loaded on wrong,
and further from right
Spinning around/two howling moons
And they're always there
Whatever I do...
The river is loaded/I've been there today
Asked it some questions,
She does me again
I'd die in your arms/If you were dead too
Here comes a lie:
"We will always be true."
Going up, then coming down
Scratched away--
It's the Little Thing to kill,
Tearing all my brains out again, for the
Little Thing to kill.
That Little Thing to kill...
Bigger you give/bigger you get
We're boss at "Denial"
But best at "Forget."
The cupboard is empty
And we really need food!
Summer is winter,
and you always knew.
Going up and coming down--
Scratched away...
It's the Little Thing to kill,
Tearing all my brains out again, for the
Little Thing to kill.
That Little Thing to kill...
Tearing out my brains
For that little .... Little...
I'll shut your mouth!
My will is the food!
Addicted to love, and
I'm addicted to bullshit!
I killed you once,
I'll kill you again!
We're starving and crude,
Welcome my friend! to
The Little Thing to kill,
Tearing all my brains out again, for the
Little Thing to kill.
Tearing all my brains out again, for that
Little little little little little...
On Leviticus:
Eating Shellfish
Eating pork
Wearing clothes made of mixed fabrics
Shaving
Having a tattoo
Women speaking in church
Being anywhere near a church on your period
Making offerings if you are diasabled or disfigured
Working on Sunday
Cutting your hair
Swearing
Back talking your parents
Not being circumcised
These are all crimes punishable by death.
"Oh but Christ's sacrifice absolved us of all that and it's totally cool now."
Being Gay
"OH THATS AN ABOMINATION AND I CAN'T BE EVEN ASSOCIATED WITH IT! FUCK THOSE GAY PEOPLE! TAKE THEIR RIGHTS AWAY!"
Playing Dragon Age Inquisition.
I see a character from Dragon Age 1. A character whom my protagonist loved, and was extremely close to.
A character who betrayed me right before the final events of the game.
I see her in Dragon Age 3.
I do not care that the protagonist of DA3 is not the same as the protagonist of DA1.
If I find a way to kill this bitch, she will die. And the consequences be fucking damned -^-
What solace lies in the arms of Fate?
in the ill embrace of uncertainty
When did all of this
Deny our hands to be pulled down at chance?
Ripped away by destiny claws
Am I another of Fate's possessions
Dwelling on the lie of freedom?
Just another Straw pulled at random
http://youtu.b
All alone now, except for the memories
Of what we had, and what we knew
Every time, I try to leave it behind me,
I see something that reminds me of you...
Every night, the dreams return to haunt me
Your rosary wrapped around your throat..
I lie awake and sweat, afraid to fall asleep
I see your face looking back at me~
Looking back at me!
And I raise my head and stare
Into the eyes of a Stranger
I've always known- that the mirror never lies!
People always turn away
From the eyes of a Stranger
Afraid to know
what lies behind the stare...
Is this all that's left
Of my life before me?
Straight jacket memories, sedative highs...
No happy ending
Like they always promised!
There's got to be something left for me!
And I raise my head and stare
Into the eyes of a Stranger
I've always known- that the mirror never lies!
People always turn away
From the eyes of a Stranger
Afraid to know
What lies behind the stare...
How many times must I live this tragedy?
How many more lies will they tell me?
All I want is the same as everyone!
"Why am I here?
And for how long?"
And I raise my head and stare
Into the eyes of a Stranger
I've always known that the mirror never lies!
People always turn away
From the eyes of a Stranger!
Afraid to know
What lies behind the stare...
http://youtu.b
I awoke on impact, under surveillance
From the camera eye
Searching high and low
The criminal mind, found at the scene of the crime
'Cuffed and blind
"I didn't do it!"
She said she loved me
I guess I never knew
But do we ever,
Ever really know?
She said she'd meet me
On the other side
But I knew right then
I'd never find her!
I don't believe in love!
I never have... I never will...
I don't believe in love!
It's never worth the pain that you feel~
No more nightmares!
I've seen them all!
From the day I was born
They've haunted my every move~
Every open hand
Is there to push and shove
No time for love
"It doesn't matter."
She made a difference
I guess she had a way
Of making every night seem bright as day
Now I walk in shadows-- never see the light
She must have lied
'Cause she never said "goodbye"!
I don't believe in love!
I never have, I never will
I don't believe in love!
I'll just pretend
she never was real
I don't believe in love!
I need to forget her face, I see it still!
I don't believe in love!
It's never worth the pain that you feel~~
No chance for contact
There's no reason for it
My only hope is one day I'll forget
The pain of knowing
What can never be
With or without love,
It's all the same to me!
I don't believe in love!
I never have, I never will.
I don't believe in love!
I'll just pretend she never was real...
I don't believe in love!
I need to forget her face!
I see it still!
I don't believe in love!
It's never worth
the pain that you feel...
The pain that you feel~
It doesn't matter what I say
As long as I sing with inflection~
That makes you feel I'll convey~
Some inner truth, or vast reflection...
But I've said nothing so far.
And I can keep it up, as long as it takes!
And it don't matter who you are~
If I'm doing my job,
then it's your resolve that breaks--becaus
The Hook brings you back!
I ain't tellin' you no lie~
The Hook brings you back,
On that you can rely!
There is something amiss~
I am being insincere.
In fact, I don't mean any of this.
Still, my confession draws you near!
To confuse the issue-- I refer
To familiar heroes, from long ago.
No matter how much Peter loved her~
What made the Pan refuse to grow? Was that
The Hook brings you back.
I ain't tellin' you no lie
The Hook brings you back!
On that you can rely.
Wheter you're Rin Tin Tin
or Anne Boleyn
Make a desperate move
or else you'll win--and then begin
to see
What you're doing to me,
This MTV is not for free!
It's so PC it's killing me~So desperately
I sing to thee of LOVE!
Sure?
--but also rage and hate and pain and fear of self.
And I can't keep these feeling on the shelf
I've tried--Well no, in fact I lied!
Could be financial suicide, but I've got too much pride inside
To hide! Or slide!
I'll do as I decide
and let it ride till until I've died
And only then shall I abide by this tide
Of catchy little tunes,
And hip three minute diddies~
I wanna bust all your balloons
I wanna burn of all your cities
to the GROUND
But I've found, I will not mess around
Unless I play, then "hey,"
I will go on all day--Hear what I say
I have a prayer to pray.
That's really all this was.
And when I'm feeling stuck and need a buck
I don't rely on luck, Because
The Hook brings you back!
I AIN'T tellin' you no lie!!!
The Hook, oooh
On that you can rely.
Setting sun can't shine
Now you're gone
Inside sleeping
My heart beating
You know that you
Tried to hide it
Couldn't you have
Said what you meant?
Time heals, time
Congeals around us
Endless hours of
Wasted moments
Understanding'
Not demanding
Your eyes tell what
You feel inside
Setting sun can't shine
Now you're gone
Inside sleeping
My heart beating
You know that you
Tried to hide it
Shouldn't you have
Said what you meant?
Don't try to pretend, I saw through you
Whispering, too
Telling me what I'm thinking
You saw I was pissed, didn't matter much
No matter how many times I asked
You only answered straight when drunk
Every time you said the L word
You didn't feel it
I shouldn't put my heart in the hands
Of those who could so easily kill it
You wouldn't look me in the eyes
I'm a fool for being surprised
How easy you shrug loss off
Pretending to be anesthetized
You had options and I didn't
So you decided not to try
Look at me, admit it.
Look at me. Face it.
YOU LIED.
If this offends you, you have no sense of humor.
I'm just gonna say it. EA sports MMA is a 100% unfair game even on medium mode. The game obviously move-reads. With maximum possible punching speed, I launch combos at the enemy AI from all angles, all levels, different punches, it doesn't matter.
I remember the things you told me. I remember the secrets, whether the were true or not. The dog, the bullethole, the colors draining from the world, and the glass box where it always rains.
I hope you forgot.
I hope I forget my own secrets someday.
Somehow, I feel responsible.
I don't think I'll forget any of them.
I don't think I've left the walls of my own box.
These are the words
For my Carol Ann,
The girl I broke in half.
Oh I'm afraid
There's nothing left
No pieces to put back in place.
I was a monster...
The things that I did
I regret,
I dismiss
Oh it's a shame
About Carol Ann,
And all she could have been.
She soared with such grace,
As her body sailed
Through the windshield
From the passenger seat...
I was a monster.
Through neglect, I replaced
Her love for these lonely days.
She'll be forgotten
Oh she'll be forgotten, I think...
Young hearts belong
To a love that
Everybody wants.
But we can't have all of that,
So we take
What little we can.
Oh mother,
Did you see him coming?
Did you see him?
Mother, did you see death sneaking
Through the back door?
Still, that time we wish we spent
but lost it all
Mother, did you see it coming?
Did you see him?
Mother did you see death sneaking
Through the back door?
This time
We'll reinforce the walls!
Don't turn the page love!
It's words
Don't hold your fate.
I sure will remain one,
Yet from their world
You will escape.
Through the walls of your heart
You will tear me apart.
Through the walls of your heart
You will tear me apart.
Through the walls!
Through the walls!
Through the walls.
Through the walls.
Mosquitos cloud without mercy
Mosquitos out all winter long
Feel them light upon your face
Inflamed itchy welts they raise, yeah!
You--
Thought--
They'd fuck off by now
But your luck runs out!
(To the tune of "All Nightmare Long" -Metallica)
I play guitar, I read, and write
I live, I learn, I love, I lie
One eye sees the past, with the other I scry
Yet all I see is a Dead, Red Sky
Must needs redeem this name of mine
Forgotten, buried, 'neath stains of time
I never sleep, I crawl, and fly
I limp, I fall, I burn, I die.
I have a Hunger I can never sate
You owe me something I intend to take
I do not mourn, nor beg for faith,
I don't cry, I don't mourn,
I Hate.
Ugh, being depressed for no reason is such fun.
Me: I feel lethargic and gross and bummed out for no good reason.
Brain: need a reason? I can help with that! Let me just pull up the memory files of all the horrible shit that ever happened to you...
Me: for fucks sake, Brain! Can't you just let me stare off into space in peace?!!?