Also, I am stuck between platonic and romantic love for Jukka. It's some sort of weird hybrid species born somewhere in the middle; I know that, in the end, we're not compatible as partners, but on some days I seriously think he might have been the love of my life. You just don't get over a man who restores your faith in the matters of the heart. Not that I've ever fully got over anyone I had feelings for. But this... even if I were not abstaining for other reasons, this would make me hesitant to act on any other attraction. Incidentally, I find myself yet again rather drawn to an old crush, and since I never was any good at reading people when it comes to these things, I've not the faintest idea whether the interest is returned. Sigh.
Bloody hormones.

</whine>

>>Eleven days.

Fucking panic attacks.

>>Twelve days.

You know what really hurts? Putting lotion on the broken skin of your eyelids. Stiiiiings.
This weekend I am spending as a geisha. I won't have the correct hairdo, but I do have a very pretty kimono and make-up supplies. Today was the first day. Too bad the face paints are water soluble; I messed it up by crying. <_< Must try to practise greater self-control tomorrow.
It's a good thing I get to see so many familiar faces this weekend, though it makes the reality of missing them even more poignant. Ah. I'll simply have to meet people when I visit home.

Most recent meme making the rounds.

[ ]Given a hickey
[¤]Danced around in your underwear
[ ]Gotten a hickey
[¤]Gone to summer camp
[ ]Sang into your hairbrush
[ ]Refused to obey a teacher
[¤]Cried in public
[ ]Made a perverted snowman
[?]Done the splits
[ ]Picked flowers from other people's lawns
[¤] Walked around in your underwear
[?]Been grounded
[¤]Tripped on your feet
[ ]Checked under your bed before going to sleep
[ ]Played on a sports team
[¤]Spent all day on the computer
[ ]Worn black nail polish
[ ]Forgotten a birthday of someone important
[¤]Had a conversation with yourself
[¤]Fallen asleep at school
[ ]Lied to a doctor
[?]Been to a slumber party
[¤]Had a pillow fight
[¤]Lied about your age
[ ]Made fun of someone to fit in
[ ]Stood up for someone who was being bullied
[¤]Heard people talking badly about you
[ ]Been called fat
[ ]Been called anorexic
[¤]Fainted
[ ]Went outside in underwear
[ ]Worn an article of clothing without realizing the tag was still on
[ ]Kicked someone 5 years younger than you
[ ]Cursed at a teacher
[¤]Cried in front of a teacher
[ ]Cursed at a parent
[ ]Done drugs
[¤]Licked somebody
[ ]Called the police
[ ]Made a prank call
[ ]Stolen something from a store
[ ]Said a racist comment and meant it
[ ]Made yourself throw up
[¤]Thought you were going crazy
[¤]Doubted your sexuality
[¤]Lied to a teacher
[¤]Wished you were dead
[ ]Tried to kill yourself
[ ]Given the finger to a complete stranger
[¤]Been to a concert
[ ]Went to school in pajamas
[ ]Hurt an animal on purpose
[ ]Broken something that was special to someone else because you were mad
[ ]Cheated on a test
[ ]Copied off of someone else's homework
[ ]Sworn at a little kid
[ ]Driven while you were drunk
[ ]Been in a car accident
[ ]Spit in someone's food
[ ]Ran away from home
[¤]Skinny-dipped
[ ]Held a real gun
[ ]Wished someone would die
[ ]Been beaten up
[ ]Beat someone else up
[ ]Wished someone would be raped
[¤]Wondered what the world has come to
[ ]Had a crush on a teacher
[ ]Ate so much you got sick
[¤]Hurt yourself on purpose
[ ]Thrown a glass object so that it broke
[ ]Cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend
[ ]Kissed someone you hardly knew
[ ]Smoked a cigarette
[ ]Broken a bone
[¤]Bitten someone
[ ]Worn a mini skirt
[ ]Made out with someone of the same sex
[ ]Eaten dog/cat food
[ ]Stuck gum under a table
[¤]Written on a desk at school
[¤]Chewed a pencil
[ ]Spit on someone
[ ]Been spit on
[ ]Driven over your lawn
[¤]Told your crush you liked them
[¤]Skipped class
[ ]Written on a cubicle in a public bathroom
[¤]Stayed up all night
[ ]Eaten a bag of cookies in a day
[ ]Been kicked out of a store
[ ]Put dog/cat food in someone's food
[ ]Refused to pay someone back after you promised you would
[?]Read someone else's diary
[¤]Sworn at an animal
[¤]Tripped in public
[?]Walked into a pole
[ ]Walked into a parked car
[¤]Found someone older than you very attractive
[ ]Stapled your finger
[ ]Laughed at someone who was seriously hurt
[ ]Found a bug in your cereal
[ ]Been so lazy you wouldn't get up to go to the bathroom
[?]Fell off the bed
[ ]Peed your pants at school
[¤]Watched porn
[ ]Almost drowned
[ ]Had a black eye
[ ]Went roller blading and crashed into a bush
[ ]Made fun of someone because they were fat
[ ]Snuck out of the house
[¤]Dyed your hair
[¤]Cut your own hair
[ ]Been stung by a bee/wasp
[ ]Climbed on a roof
[¤]Worn gothic make-up
[ ]Had a contact break in your eye
[ ]Had food poisoning
[ ]Had heat-stroke
[?]Bought an article of clothing and never wore it
[¤]Cut yourself on a blade
[ ]Fallen on glass
[ ]Worn an article of clothing that was lime green
[ ]Eaten a bug
[¤]Eaten something that fell on the ground
[¤]Had surgery
[¤]Needed braces
[¤]Worn a bikini
[¤]Failed a test
[¤]Failed a class
[ ]Been teacher's pet
[ ]Been teacher's least favorite student
[ ]Slow danced
[ ]Been afraid of the dark
[¤]Seriously thought of hurting someone else
[?]Had a cavity
[¤]Been in love

>>Thirteen days.

Packed some more of my clothes, most of the remaining ones, into a large suitcase. Have been thinking about which books to take and which to leave. There won't be much time over the weekend because of RopeCon (http://www.ropecon.fi/2008/I18N/118N), but I'll probably start stacking the books on Sunday evening.

>>Beginning countdown. Fourteen days.

In two weeks (two fucking weeks!) I'll pile my stuff in the family car and initiate the moving process. We're leaving on Wednesday, to spend the night at the summer house and then to continue on our way to Oulu on Thursday morning. Parental units will stay for a day or two to help me settle down. Then I'll be on my own.
Feeling anxious on decidedly shortening intervals. Breathe, man, breathe...

Tonight, I'll be packing some of my clothes - as much as I can fit into one bag.

28 degrees Celsius in the shadow. Working in the heat is almost as bad as working in the rain... *melts into a puddle*

I hate hate hate hate hate writer's block that pops up when you least need it.
Trin, you may kick me. Repeatedly. I'll send what I have of the fic in a message, which fortunately is most of it, but I'm afraid the rest will have to wait some more. I'm sorry. ;____; You may give me a penalty. Or something.

I'm being dragged off to grandpa's until Friday. So no Lami on zeh interwebs again for a couple of days. After that, however, I should mostly stay put.

Will be away again tomorrow; first taking care of some shopping and delivering my appliance papers for student support to KELA, then off to Hyvinkää to see Laura who is visiting her mother there. Back some time Tuesday.
Trin: I've almost completely outlined the plot for the soirée now, all I've got to do is write it out. I'll have it posted on Tuesday evening. This be a promise. Srsly. Lagged enough already. Also, I swear I'll have Harry's birthday fic actually on time. I've had an idea for it for a while now. :P

Update at Coal black wings, should anyone be interested. :P

Anyone able to identify this one?

I hath returned!
...and once again, the effort to catch up with things will have to be remarkable. Sigh. Forums, here I come.

My love to all of you! (Especially le Skurpists.)
Net cafés are zeh best. The place is open tomorrow as well, so I may or may not be here in the afternoon. If not, I'll see you peoples Sunday night.
<3

I be off now. Back sometime Sunday evening.
Take care, hold the fort! *huggles people*

Often, I wonder what the heck made me like Jukka in the first place. He's an arrogant bastard who drives me up the wall if I spend too much time with him. But this comment... this, here, reminds me exactly why I love him.

*Huggles*

You'll do fine in Oulu. Remember, you got in. Therefore, you were better than a crapload of other people. Also, you'll be on the same lectures with dozens of other troubled introverts (it takes a strange turn of mind to apply for English philology). You should be able to make new friends there.

Muh.
It's confirmed, now - the results from the Tampere uni entrance exams were published online, and Jukka is among those who were accepted. This means that I will be starting in Oulu alone, since he's made it clear that if he gets to Tampere, he'll take the place. He even has an apartment ready and waiting, inheritance from some relative or another.
I didn't think it would bother me quite this much, since I'd been preparing to be on my own from the start. So, unexpectedly, I find myself feeling just the slightest bit lonely right at the moment.

Off to my cousin's. I'll be back Friday afternoon at the latest. :3