[deja vu, mi amor]'s diary
hey people please vote for me for sexiest elftown female sexiest elftown female thanks!! ill love you forever if you do...lol
thanks again!!
another day spent stareing at these walls
another night, a couple more falls
takeing my time, to try and find
a way to see, a saner mind
crying for the pain i once felt
for the heart that was once held
desprate cold and lonesome
just trying to wait, morning will come
one more night, one thousand more tear drops
blind to the world, numb to dreams and hopes
falling hard, sliping fast
watching silently as my life dies in the past
another breath, another scream
one more nightmare, one more broken dream
calling my last cries
seeing the finnal lies
not one more day, not one more night
not another word to say, not another battel to fight
~Me~
Thursday, October 27, 2050
You are worth exactly: $1,812,542.00.
hmmm......
this is no longer a new poem...but i still like this one, tell me what you think, please.
Deathly beauty
your scared to take one more step
because you fear that you might fall
your hesitating to take one more breath
for fear that it might be your last
as the night slowly passes
you start to tire and become faint
her voice swims in your mind
reminding you that your not alone
and might not ever be again
your wish was granted
in such a terrible way
your crime cast out upon
the just rising sun
for you to see in all of its dreadful beauty
this is not the time for regrets
you have to move quickly now
don't wait until she wakes
the morning sun has started to stir
the hill rises beyond you
against the pale moon
where the barely there stars loom above
your grave for her to rest
she lies there so peacefully
it seems almost as if she were merely sleeping
not one thought clouds her mind
and now her face appears as you have always wanted it
ice cold, smooth as the stones
that washed ashore this morning
lifeless, but yet more beautiful than ever
she is finally your, truly yours
another poem i like...
My Chamber of Thoughts
I dream of a time
When I ruled my mind
And you were no where to be seen
Where I could not hear your screams
And I did not frighten easily
At the mention of your name
I wish of times
When only I knew myself
And you didn't have my secrets to hold
The key to my hopeless days
I unlocked your terror
And set it free upon the world
So they could suffer just as I had
And I could hear their silent screaming
Just as they had once heard mine
But refused to listen
I tried to warn you
I told you it would not be forever this way
But you chose not to hear my words, so brave
And marked me off as just another lonely child
Of the dark lies of tomorrow
Maybe now you will spend your days
Dreaming of your free thoughts
And regretting the things you fought not to say
You will wish you had been the one who turned against
The power that is held within
These closed walls of a future gone away
To a controlled system of
Beliefs that you don't really have
And things that you won't ever see
Once more I will speak a brave thought
And show you what my strength has finally brought.
~me~
i did not write this poem, [Annie T.] did. i wanted to paste a copy here because i love this poem. its great.
A sad, lost lover
like no other.
night after night
dreams full of fright
did you really believe her death
would satisfy evil under breath?
A blow to cause you pain,
she'd not even try to bring in vain.
but the reflection shows.
torment you're mind only knows.
A sword of dismay
is your hands' great display.
Perhaps her soul still makes sound,
but her body lay on the ground.
death, you answered at dawn
love, your answer long gone.
did you really believe her death
would satisfy evil under breath?
-[Annie T.]
Song Of The Week
We Believe
There's a women crying out tonight Her world has changed She asked God why Her only son has died and now her daughter cries She cant sleep at night Downtown another day for all the suits and ties Another war to fight there's no regard for life How can they sleep at night, How can we make things right Just want to make this rght We believe in this love We are all the same Human in all our ways and all are pain So let it be, There's a love that could fall down like rain Let us see, let forgiveness wash away the pain What we need, And no one really knows what they are serching for We believe, This world is crying for so much more We believe In this Love So this world, is too much for you to take Just lay it down and follow me I'll be everything you need, In every way We believe in this Love
GC
with night comes depression
what was hidden deep inside
never fails to break loose
spilling tears into the darkness
she cant help but cry
why cant those doubts just leave her?
its all she wants
no words can help
she has done this to herself
in some ways its all her fault
she thinks sometimes
but in her heart she knows
she is not to blame
he is not to blame
there are no medicins to cure her aching soul
no remidies to heal her breaking heart
nothing has happened
and yet everything has changed
when she looks back
she cant see one thing that should have been diffrent
the truth was not so bad
so why is her pain unbareable?
there is no answer for her question
she knows nothing he says will change her doubts
no matter how she wishes to beleive him
nothing can change and now its here to stay
as the thoughts of the night come
tears role down her face
soon to mix with blood
stranger
why am i such a stranger
to my self and to everyone else?
you have known me so long
but you still act like
im the stranger looking
through the broken glass
to the mess you have
created because of me
but im the stranger
and you cant let me in
you dont talk to strangers
you dont know who i am
or why im there with you
and why i wont ever leave
im still here
you cant push me away
i will stay
i will be a stranger forever
if thats what you want
you dont have to let me in
i cant make you see me as a friend
but i can always be here
even though you dont want
me to see all that you have done
all the mistakes you have made
and all the pain i have caused
you know the stranger is sorry
you know the stranger
is the reason for your pain
but you also know
that the sranger will always be
by your side to love you
no matter what you have done
i feel so freakin depressed right now, i cant stand it. i cant stand feeling this way. i hate it. i just want to....to go to sleep, just for a while not forever, no i dont want to die. i just want to stop feeling for a little while, stop having to deal with everything. and one more thing, i want to know why im feeling this way. i dont know, things are no worse than usual, so why am i being like this? why cant i make myself feel better? can anything help me right now? anything at all? i dont know. i wish i could think of something. anything. and now i just wish i couldnt think at all! i make no sense not even in my own mind. i cant understand me so im sure no one else can either. but thats ok....i guess. no its not ok, not right now, nothing is ok right now and i DONT KNOW WHY!!!! i hate feeling this way so much. i hate it! and now i have complained enought, i think ill go, for now.
Deathly beauty
your scared to take one more step
because you fear that you might fall
your hesitating to take one more breath
for fear that it might be your last
as the night slowly passes
you start to tire and become faint
her voice swims in your mind
reminding you that your not alone
and might not ever be again
your wish was granted
in such a terrible way
your crime cast out upon
the just rising sun
for you to see in all of its dreadful beauty
this is not the time for regrets
you have to move quickly now
dont wait untill she wakes
the morning sun has started to stir
the hill rises beyond you
against the pale moon
where the barely there stars loom above
your grave for her to rest
she lies there so peacfully
it seems almost as if she were merely sleeping
not one thought clouds her mind
and now her face appears as you have always wanted it
ice cold, smooth as the stones
that washed ashore this morning
lifeless, but yet more beautiful than ever
she is finally your, truly yours
i havent written anything in a really long time. for a while i just didnt feel like writeing and then my computer crashed...agai
i feel so awful today. i am haveing on of those rare times where i really want to talk to someone, anyone. i am usually not at all deprate for company and do not beg strangers to talk to me but today there is really something wrong with me. i feel so alone...i dont know why i feel like i do. i feel so horrible. its been so long since i was like this. i need to talk to someone. my mond wont stop raceing from one thought to the next and i cant stand it. i think i will just go to bed.
i wrote this last night. i dont like it because its not any good but its the first thing i have wrote in a week or so.
She has lost her spirit
Hope is calling but she cannot hear it
Reality has reached her and she cant seem to bear it
She is dying inside but she will let no one care
She's tried so long to stay alive
It was so hard for to just survive
Each day was just another dive
To a place so far away where she would not be recognized as live
No one knows her story
Not one person has ever seen her fury
Inside is where her pain is buried
And to release it she will not be hurried
Her tears are only her own
She will cry only while alone
She cannot stand the way people talk to her, pity is their tone
There seems to be no thing of her left, she is merely a skeleton, just bones
yesterday was my great grandmas funeral. it was a pretty hard day too. i was so lucky to have jacob spend the day with me. he was really a great comfort. another bad thing was that i had to spend most of the day with my family. my family has this inabilty to get along for more than an hour, it was awful! even though it was a time of mourning for all of us and the had enough sense to keep their mouths shut, you could still feel all the hate and tension between them. i can stand it when my family decides its time to be together, luckyly it only happens about once a year.
today i spent most of the day on here. i got so mad because i could not get two of my badges to show up on my house. i finally asked for the help of anyone and not one person messaged me to help me out! after a few hours i messaged someone who belonged to a few wikis, and she was really nice and a great help.
today was hard. my great grandma died the day before yesterday, and my family were making all the funeral arrangments today. my mom was supposed to be the one who made arrangments for the music, my grandma had always wanted live music at her funeral. the person my mom had planed to get to sing fell through at the last momment. i had to get someone my boyfriend knows to sing. i didnt like doing that very much...but what choice did i really have? it was my grandmas only wish for her funeral.
well i just finished putting my poetry in here. i had to work to day, walked alot and now im tired. i thought that since school was out i would be able to sleep late, but its not working out that way. i went to the pool saturday i swam for like five hours the next day my whole body ached!i am really out of shape, not that i was ever in shape... i only put some of my poems not all of them, i havent got all of them typed up yet but most of my poetry will eventually be in here...i hope so anyway. i am glad school is out but i already miss my friends alot.