"Recording negotatians....

The recording of a new double album shall commence shortly. It should be finished by the end of the year.
The first album will be Rezzerections own songs and the second shall be covers...


The recording shall be produced by Ash.C and Karl Newman (sound tech)."

this partcularly amusing extract isn't mine, obviously, but my friend ash 

2005-07-18 JAAN: go fak off jordan, what double standards so ther basically doin exactly what there disowning me for. Hows that diet goin by the way, only 8 burgers, 6 pizzas and 12 large milk shakes for brunch, a light snack for u i suppose. Ur idea of a light snack is Africas idea of adequette aid, take the that u fat lil tory

  
2005-07-18 Brimstone and whisky: right james fair enough im overweight big fucking woop you best hope idont see your scrawny little face in town

2005-07-18 nebs2204: wooo im fat to

2005-07-18 Cyber Fairy: its not a crime to be lol

2005-07-18 nebs2204: no thats rite meg !

2005-07-18 Cyber Fairy: i kno im right lol stop fighting u lot its not nice u all rock so theres no need to b fightin lol ^_^

2005-07-19 nebs2204: what she said

2005-07-19 JAAN: allright fair enough, fighting is stupid, but, you know, he started it.. Imagine that on the days leading up to rezzerections gig jordan is using this board as vamp for his bloated prejudiced warmongering opinions, sheer self indulgance ... he should be ashamed.

  
2005-07-19 nebs2204: what the fuck u on about james

2005-07-19 JAAN: i often ask my self that... oh please try to refrain from swearing. Kna what im saying is that we should use this board for talkin bou rezzi, and not slaggin me off however BIG the urge

  

Letter number: 43658981
From: [JAAN] (Yeah i fancy a person with the initials GL)
To: [Matt Buckley] (goin down a hole falling falling falling)
Sent mail 2005-07-21 17:18:02

 
Oi what are u doin farting about my page bearing, what looks to me, a belated message for some old somethin or other from norwhich your grooming for your own ends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Have u no shame!!!, oh by the way did u play at that gig on tuesday...?


You need to expunge your erant muses and consolatate your abilities, if u know what im talkin bout

this is made all the more funny if u go onto his homepage, or better yet speak, hes certainly an interseting character. \but nothing more u casnt take him seriously

How do, i just thought in light of the deviously creative streak i've been building up for the last couple of weeks, i'd put up some of my more memorable messages of recent times.

" Letter number: 5291369
From: [Joey Division] (Ich bein einen twat )
To: [nudge the dude] (Naaaaa...)
Sent mail 2005-07-22 13:37:42
Unread

 
oh so ur not gonna answer my carefully prepared messages. I spent hours on them, lavishing them with all the care jordan would have for a cornish pasty... no 2 cornish pasties, and u cant even be bothered to answer me. I tell u what tell everyone every one to fuck off and start giving a shit bout our band cause i've had enough of ur diva bullshit, u can fuck off if u think im gonna be respectful towards u after you've so unceremonuosly emptied the contents of ur bowels copiously on my head, and forced me to eat it up; well im not gonna eat it; im not jordan i dont eat the tears of orphans or the pensions of old people despite Ash proclamations ( allright im paraphrasing, he only really said he was annoyed at me for playin in one key, which is the most pretenious thing ever cause hes the most musically illetereate people i know.) I deserve a proper band member who cares. You can go to the jazz band for ur music preformance ( By the way Mr. led zepplin that is the anthesis of rock n roll as u know it) and hide behind them playin the 2nd cornet ( Fact) part which the 1st cornet player probally taught u orally u know with a cornetto, but i cantr i rock in earnset buddy, and i need at least one to get stuck in with me in unison, and u aint doin that at the moment.


Further more.. im a veritable intelectual colosus, my genius, and the stimulus i provide, will invaribly make u a more consenoius person devoid with all the pretensions and self dilusions of ur contempories"

This war partly a joke, though knowing him it will go, inveraibly, over his head.. Whichs beg the question why did i even post it in the first place? Cause im a condescending smug lil b$stard, so i've been told ( but at least i have the courtesey to censor my work to a certain degree.