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Page name: Chapter One of Violent Vibes [Logged in view] [RSS]
2004-05-16 01:45:08
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Chapter One


It was a sad scene for many that day; his wife, his brother, his step dad and his college roommate. His wife, Marigold, had been crying for hours. His brother, Hector Carbin, comforted her wounded heart. His step father, Glenn Saldivar just sat there, grave as ever. His roommate, Myron Bamberg, just stared at the floor as they all awaited the news about their family member\friend, Stu VelDeshine. All of them had been contacted after the accident. Marigold stopped everything and came as quickly as she could. His brother came, picking his stepfather up as well. His roommate just happened to be his next door neighbor. He hitched a ride with Marigold.
The doctor came out; everyone stood up. He gave them all a serious look. Yet there was pity in his gaze.
“I'm sorry,” he began. “There is not much we can do today. We'll have to wait until tomorrow.”
Marigold screamed at the thought of her husband leaving her. She collapsed to the floor with both Hector and Myron comforting her. Glenn just sat in his seat, starring with no compassion whatsoever at the three.
There he was, lying in the hospital bed with his monitor beeping slowly. Body lifeless , eyes closed, no sign of conscious. But inside his head, his expedition was about to start.
(Edited)


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2004-04-25 [Chi]: cool start! I must read more! *surries to next chapter* WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM ;.;

2004-04-26 [mywolfalways]: I really liked how you captured the visual of each person involved in this part. More detail about their expressions may help even more in this part, I think.

2004-04-27 [Blaze the Nameless]: As usual! (thanks Chi!)

2004-05-14 [Liaden]: You have a wonderful Talent

2004-05-16 [Leelo]: Yep, I agree, I'm gonna read some more.

2004-05-16 [Blaze the Nameless]: Thanks Liaden and Passion!

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