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Filthy Little Secret to go back...* speaks as if I'm talking to a 2 year old...
*
My Thoughts...not yours, but maybe my thoughts are about you? But maybe not....I'll never tell.
Happy
Bubbles
Joy
Happy
Flowers
Toys
Happy
Love
Glue
Happy
Me
You
~Me...*sighs*
All is lost
Evil is born
The window’s coloring
Upon a dark dawn
All the evil
All the hate
Nothing
~me
Of water and the wind
A lonely childhood dream
Of faerie’s blood spilled, shaken
The endless frozen scream
Of earth and of fire
Hell shall override
The gates of green lay broken
Peace trampled…died
Of sky and the heather
The healing of the souls
Born again is peace renewal
Upon the bed of gold
~Me
Am I crazy?
Some people say.
But do you
Know why?
Two people
One outside
The other
Left behind
~Me
I don't understand
This rage pouring through me
This vile and hateful feeling
I loathe you and you know why...
I scream and you can't hear me.
~Me
Your voice in my head
aches.
Pounding, my nerves are
frayed-
eyes looking at
you-
make me sick with
disgust-
is all I
feel-
you sending me over the
edge-
of madness drives my
hate-
builds to the height of
my-
frenzy is taking
over-
my logic is losing to
you're-
dead.
~Me
The arrival of winter
Shrouds the sky in black clouds
The One hides in the darkness
Beneath the underground.
The blood candle lights the way
In the whispering woods
The voices in the shadows
Desire the coming moons.
~Me
Burn this flower
stained red,
so red.
Burn my sin
I'm dead,
so dead.
Crimson stains
on my lips.
Crimson rains
from your rips.
Your skin so white,
white like snow.
Tempting me,
your too slow.
Now you are,
dead,
so dead.
Burn this flower,
stained red,
so red.
~Me
I taught you all you know of sin...
You personified innocence.
so good, so pure
a thousand miles away from
the edge.
When I took you in my hand and
became your teacher,
I stole all that was noble in you...
smashed it under my heel.
did it sting?
did you die a little death when all you knew became false?
I made you do things you couldn’t contemplate,
without a single word leaving my mouth.
A look or a gesture could send you into convulsions,
a frenzy of obedience.
Wrecking you, molding you,
gave me such delight.
I knew you would be my greatest creation.
Your heart, once so pure,
became black and twisted under my careful watch.
Those scars on your wrists…
I was present in your mind when
the razor glided over skin and
became slick with blood.
I was there when the cut went
too deep.
I smiled as you left your innocence in a crimson pool.
I taught you all you know of sin.
~Me
Blossoming in the midst of midnight,
You draw my mind near your gleam.
Driving the thorn into my heart,
You lure my soul into your dream.
Black rose...
Your thorns boring into my flesh,
Your steadfast gaze talking of sin.
Black rose...
Your thorns so crimson red,
Ripping wounds into my skin.
Your darkness burns into my heart,
Eating so deep into my thoughts,
Scorching all my lies of fear,
Leaving me to greedy glow.
Black rose...
Your thorns boring into my flesh,
Your flaming words raging within.
Black rose...
Your thorns so crimson red
Ripping wounds beneath my skin.
You opened the door to forgotten blaze,
Led me to the depth of darker dreams,
Compelled me to taste my long lost rage,
Forced me to feel devouring flames.
Now my veins are like fire,
Ardent beneath my skin.
New rush of desire,
Compell me to breathe.
Finally arisen,
New pain, new life I seize.
Black rose...
Your thorns boring into my flesh.
Life's pulsating through my veins
Black rose...
Your thorns so crimson red
burn the prison,
set me free to love you...
~Me
I mourn in the Light,
And shall not wither,
I hallow thy ways,
Never forever.
Of thy rose of scorn,
I love despite spite,
I thrive on nothing,
But the dreams to die.
~Me
Darkness comes and kisses my eyes closed.
I lie, waiting for the goodbye of my soul.
Praying that Death does not forsake me.
Memories burn as they flood my mind.
I now feel my blood start to chill.
Death is the time I have lived for.
Smiling, I fall farther away from this existance.
How comforting this Death feels...
The pain of this life starts to leave me now.
One last memory comes into my view.
It is you...
You loved me then.
You do still.
We were happy together.
I love you.
I want you.
It's too late....
I can't breathe.
I did not truly want this.
My blood is like ice.
What have I done?
My heart stops.
Too late.
Death did not forsake me...
~Me
ME: "You're void within."
MYSELF: So. It's all I've ever known.
ME: "You have nothing without."
MYSELF: Nothing is something to me.
ME: "It is all a dream inside another dream."
MYSELF: Really? Then I should wake soon.
ME: "They are thoughts playing off someone elses thoughts."
MYSELF: I have my own thoughts. I don't need anyone elses.
ME: "Is there someone there with you?"
MYSELF: Of course.
ME: "You're a prisoner inside yourself."
MYSELF: I am more free than you.
ME: "You're so alone, you don't even realize it."
MYSELF: No, I'm not. Insanity gives me someone to talk to.
~Me & Myself
Emptiness takes me over,
As I sink deeper into this darkness....
Where I will dwell.
The shadows that I created,
The darkness that I previously caressed.
The fragile blue sky’s betrayed me,
Blinded by the sunlight that I have grown to despise.
I fell for the sake of finding the duration of my flight.
The downward journey makes me feel I have reached my potential...
Nothing.
What was the reason for me?
A traveller lost in sleep.
I sold my innocent soul to whoever paid to care.
Now, I have nothing for memories.
I cry empty tears.
Why bother?
Forgotten by my illusions,
I depicted all my fears.
Dreams are now being scattered.
I have very little say,
What I do say, has very little meaning.
Time is passing me by slowly,
I am regretting each day.
My flaws have many stories to tell....
How and Why.
My high points only have endings that make no sense.
I question if you ever cared how I was feeling.
Now, I don't even care how I am feeling.
Did I ever listen to what my heart was saying to me?
Should I have ever been to begin with?
Many speculations rise from my indecisive mind,
All in the name of what happiness I may or may not find.
To be glanced at and left, not really seen.
I am only to be blamed.
To step onto center stage untalented,
I am to be shamed...gladl
y I take it.
Emptiness fills the air around me,
I feel I need to undeniably pray....but to who?
My emptiness will be the death of me. When?
This, I know all too well,
A heart can only break so much before there is nothing left to it.
My feelings...you never glanced back to see....
Where were you?
Here lies me, myself and I
Here, slowly die all the questions....
Who?
Why?
What?
Where?
When?
How?
~Me
Bitter tears fall in the rain.
Sobbing words fall on deaf ears.
Silent screams, an ache that has no end.
Broken dreams lay shattered.
A world crumbles before it had a chance to be.
Silent hope dies.
Nothing good lasts.
All fails the test of time.
Be it from ones own folly,
Or death stealing the life of what you loved.
Time that is a healer, is also the hunter.
It clouds precious memories.
It passes us by leaving only ash in it wake.
~Me
Let my body
Of my willingly chained existence
Be bound tightly by the
Blackened desire of Your control.
Let the resistence of the play
Measure surely unto my submissiveness.
Let the sting of the whip
Grow in perpetuation to the
Layers of the play.
Let the pain that I crave
Come in spoonfuls I can swallow.
Let my collar be led
Truly by,
The Master I respect and follow.....
~Me
I'll be waiting...
Down a dusty gravel road
Underneath the house,
Rotting, clinging to my bones
At home.
I'll be waiting
For you to remember me,
A part you have forgotten.
You are hiding from me
Come home,
I'll be waiting.
And tears will fill my hunger,
While the ache eats your heart,
Realizing you recognize me,
From the start.
I'll be waiting...
For you to consume me,
Eating all your pain,
Back into yourself...
~Me
What if?
The damnable what if of your lambent grey eyes,
your sweet, serious mouth,
your body becomes one with mine...
You make a vaulted, lovely space of possibility in my soul.
What if?
This strange love is a lesson in stillness.
I will sit quietly in this vaulted cathedral of
yours...
mine...
ours...
And watch you,
my saviour.
Let you put colors and images on my soul,
I wait patiently for the story of us to emerge.
I surrender.
I surrender myself to you,
to the possibility of us.
I will be water, not ice,
and let you drop into me in ever widening ripples.
~Me
and still
lie still
be still
still i think of
the unknowable, unguessable, unloveable in the green water of my eyes.
still
but still
and still
be still.
~Me
I defy all that you say
and run from all that you do.
I find my fate in your eyes
and my love in your touch.
Knowing all along
that love will be the death of me.
Knowing all along
that your hand will be the one to kill me.
And when you look close enough
maybe some day you will see
that these forever scars on my body
are the aftermath of you and me.
You've let your mind absorb
all the unbidden lies
that the world has to offer.
And you've let your friends absorb
all the prefabricated lies
that your mind has to offer.
And is it all from
a coldness deep within?
Within the outter shell of your mind
that you never let me pass.
The hard shell I clawed at for months
I clawed to break my way through.
And right as I broke through the surface
you threw me for a turn,
you took me down a path...
the path of no return.
My fingers bleeding down to the quick
from scraping away the years of your mind
trying my best to set you free...
to show you who you are.
And was it all a hallucination
of who I wanted you to be...
or a deception
of who you wanted me to think
you could be?
I think my perception of you
was as wrong as the thought
of you and I ever bringing to existance
anything other than a fatal misconception
of a real and true love.
And now I'm stuck at the bend of this path.
This path of no return.
The path in which I was destined to follow
the path in which you were destined to create.
And of all the lonely places I have seen
I would have to say
that your self made path
is the lonliest of lonely.
And my fingers are bleeding to the quick
and I'm clawing harder and harder
and you push me further away
down your path of deception
to further screw up my misconception
of you...
of all that you will ever be.
Knowing all along
that love will be the death of me.
Knowing all along
that your hand will be the one to kill me.
~Me
As I fall into, you,
I see, them.
Them, tearing,
I feel, destroyed.
Shreading, me,
I throw, myself,
Into your, arms.
The pain, comes.
Tears fall, dry.
You never, see.
My heart, screams.
Too many, days.
Pieces, peering.
Til I speak, out,
of feelings, inside.
They never, release,
Give heart to, you.
Fall away, again.
~Me
After I have finished this poem,
I will go back to its beginning
and feel nothing.
Pretend that the beginning
was only a part of
a new ending.
An illusion of life.
And falling rain
on my fingers.
I am moving
up again -
Invisible is hope,
an invisible life.
our death.
Hopes are falling...now,
wet, transparent.
Through
chaos and despair...
I can't help it.
Asking
questions, longing for
simple, answers.
Getting bizzare looks,
answers of insanity.
What is simplicity?
Humility.
Knowing that the essences,
are smells, sights, tastes, hearing, feeling...
idiosyncrasies of love.
I have been lost,
in a past dream,
of lands where roaming
eyes move,
in the opposite direction ,
to reality -
of course,
reality is nothing.
Regardless
of its ending,
there is always a beginning.
I am back,
no longer me,
no longer you.
If I close my eyes,
one more time.
The sights
will devour the last
shadow
behind me,
above me,
before life,
entering me.
~Me
The last of things sight wishes to see,
Is how clearly it cannot see.
Just come with me, myself, come with me,
And we shall look on the last of things
We wish to see.
~Me
A porcelain house of trust,
Demolished.
Shattered little pieces,
Torn down by lies.
See me as you may,
Abolished.
Ripped from existance,
From the one's I loved.
See me as I'm not,
Accepted.
Pride swept over your face,
With a look of greed.
I see you as you are,
Cruel.
Pushing all away,
Expecting more of my pain.
I see you as you aren't,
Affectionate.
A hand held out for help,
I break it at the wrist.
You watch me walk away,
Astonished.
Wondering why I came,
Wasting your time again.
You'll see me again someday,
Deceased.
When we both lie below,
Buried in the depths of this...
~Me
I tried to tell you,
but you just didn't listen.
It was a warning for you to heed.
It was your desire that left you drowning in your false hope of a love that could not be ressurected.
I watched you watch me.
I cringed at the thoughts of you and your abuse.
I moved on, giving you what I told you would surely come if you kept hurting me.
Giving you the chance to feel the emptiness ya left me with day after day, night after night.
I saw you following me.
I allowed you to make your plea.
I needed to be humored that day.
One mistake you made...
You said, I belonged to you.
What made you think I belonged to you?
That I was your property?
Was it that I told you,
"I will take no more."
Was it because I said,
"Keep away or else!"
Whatever it was that made you think I "BELONG" to you,
whatever it was that made you say to me,
"I'll TAKE what's mine"
Left you crying.
Left you tortured.
Left you bleeding.
Left you begging.
Left you drugged.
Left you dying.
Left you dead.
I tried to tell you, but you just didn't listen...
~Me
I lay in this bed alone at night,
concentrating on the sound of my bare skin
sliding against the cold sheets.
Dragging my fingers next to me.
Tracing the outline of where your body should be.
My eyes close and I listen to the soft and steady
whisper of my breathing.
In my mind I match my breath to yours,
and we keep the same constant pace.
And for a moment, you are here.
The miles between us dissapear.
Finally we are in the same place.
I imagine lying next to you,
keeping my eyes locked onto yours.
Being able to breathe "I love you".
There is nothing I want more.
I can feel your strong hands slide along me
as you bring your face into my neck,
as my legs pull you closer,
and my fingers tease your back.
Show me that you love me,
that theres nothing you want more.
You are the only one I dream of.
Then my eyes slowly open to see
my fingers tracing your name against the sheets.
I find myself alone again...begging for sleep to come.
Aching to go right back to that moment where
I can see you,
I can breathe you and finally we become one...
~Me
A prisoner.
Temptation the crime.
Future the price.
Reasons are gone.
The purpose?
Never there was one.
Words remain your only escape.
Tyranny holds.
Choking your freedoms.
Suffocating your thoughts.
Gasping for pennance.
Your mercy is deprived.
BUT...
Should there be a price for release,
from this tyrannic, barbaric sentence.
It will be your life or your death.
You choose.
Either way, you lose.
Today is to live now.
Tomorrow's not a new day.
Tomorrow will become today.
Future is present.
Write eternity's history now.
Change not a word.
Live down temptation.
Live up to death.
Fear the powers captured.
Cells with no walls,
no bars.
Just your life making you afraid.
Shiver behind the lost freedom of dying.
Walk among the populous.
Only thing in sight is what's been stolen...
This is life & death...welcome to it.
~Me
The eye cannot truly see itself...
Even with a mirror, the eye
Only sees a reflection of what
It could see,
If the mirror had eyes.
Such is the way of words.
Words cannot truly convey life.
They try, to no avail.
They are themselves after all, hindered by words.
Where words fail, life succeeds with ease.
Moments echoed in time...
To hear the sounds of life,
To the point where you can hear
Sunlight striking your skin.
To taste the exact moment you
fall in love.
Such is the essence of ....essence.
~Me
Behind walls where
Dreams were whispered,
Through a haunted nightmare,
Where life's dreams end
With the blade of a knife,
Or the shot of a gun,
Or the conjuring of the wrong spirit...
Causing a mystery masked in myth,
An unforgettable unity between
An unknown entity,
And the unfortunate soul bound to the inside.
Bonded to the heavens highest,
Or hells depths.
Within the moan of the walls,
The slight sound of unknown footsteps on old floor boards;
You hear the agonizing groans of a wounded creature dying
Still, the call is loud and clear
Filled with the final sound of dying fear
The final rasping breath
Of a once dark life
Then the scream...
Finally, all is quiet
The pain is gone.
Gone are the years of suffering,
Ending the life of torment,
The life of broken dreams.
The house is empty now.
Waiting....to tell the same story to the next unsuspecting soul.
~Me
you speak,
and memories swell
against the backs of my eyes.
spiraling...
this dance
a daydream
filled with
faded emotions
falling from the sky.
this sweet somber attitude
leaves a vacant line.
like roots from a tree
winding,
twisting,
they reach around
linking my soul
from the
very core of me
up-
and around again.
flash flooding
the walls
leaking colors
like my eyes
Looking at your smile.
~Me
Icy steel traces along my veins.
Friction eased by blood.
One deep cut....make sure I enjoy.
Ripped open, exposed, and raped of my love.
Dripping crimson, passion rains down.
Watching my soul pour out.
Nails clawing at my flesh.
Tearing open and saying what words could not.
Love bearing a new name...
Rape
You rape me.
You steal away from me,
My very being of who I was.
You're killing me on the inside.
You're watching me fake it on the outside.
Your words....tiny razors to draw out my pain.
Mingle them with my pleasure.
Rape that from me as well.
But please, leave me only the darkness.
Open up the depths of the world.
Bury me in its fury.
Allow it to ravage me
You did.
Tear me apart and leave me with nothing.
But the hope of your rape.
~Me
The flower gently weeps
As the sky turns to grey.
The raindrops fall lightly
As if to follow suit.
The rain hits my face,
Both icy and wet.
Not as bitter as I could produce,
But somehow, much worse.
All this...
Because you are not here...
~Me
My eyes...
Yours upon a look.
My hands...
Yours to do with what you will.
My voice...
Speaks of nothing but you.
My thoughts...
Not mine anymore, but consumed by you.
My soul...
I would give, but it was yours at the first hint of a smile.
~Me
After the walks, the mingling, the search for empty places,
After the conversations that leave you stranded by the doors,
And thoughts that lead you to lonely spaces,
The darkness of night,
The dullness of an angry, uncaring moon.
After the gestures, the laughs, the dances,
And half remembered hopes, dreams, the retreat...
Of desire in cobwebed corners,
After the many petty annoyances,
The play of precise masks and painful words.
The still, wet streets littered with ash,
The drained, dried veins littered with death,
The darkness becomes more dark,
The song left unsung,
The barren fields of an unborn spring.
"This is not death" the darkness still whispers.
See? The voices stray.
See? The hands still touch.
Unbending,
Unheeding,
Untempting...
We have lost our way.
I remember once, the lightness of your eyes,
Blooming in the sun,
An irredescence of glittering, passionate color,
The vastness of emptiness behind you:
Some things refuse to die.
Some things refuse to be born...
~Me
Why is it this way?
Looking inside myself...
Wondering what it is all about.
I tell you,
"You're the most important in my life,
Nothing else matters".
All while I'm taking steps back to where I came from...
Why?
I feel the blood drain from me as I think of you.
Emptying myself of feelings into the blackness...
The wonder of it all.
My soul bleeds in anticipation,
I wait to hold you...I wait.
I drown slowly in my tears...
Wanting to see you, but can't.
I miss you...
I inhaled you into me.
I need you...
Or I can't breathe...
I miss you...
I held you as close as I could.
I need you...
I couldn't hold you close enough.
I miss you...
The way you looked at me.
I need you...
Your kisses, the touch of your skin.
Dark and lonely...I'm here now.
Nothing left except the momentary bliss,
Of that time spent.
Thoughts of you starts the yearning...
I want nothing...
Except for you.
~Me
Aching pain, bloody tears.
This misery, I cannot take...
Who cares?
Smile...happiness everyday.
I am good at faking it...
Who cares?
This heartfelt torture is all that is left.
My heart lies shattered on the ground...
Who cares?
There is a hole this bitter life digs into.
It bleeds as life digs deeper into my empty soul...
Who cares?
~Me
I'm sick of hearing your name.
I'm sick of seeing your face.
I can't believe my bad judgement.
The way I hung on your every word.
Believing your lies for the sake of love...
If this is love. I choose hate.
You tried to tear me down.
You almost did.
How I hate the fact I have to struggle to rise above you.
As low as you are...
Everything is gone now.
There is nothing left.
My happiness was stolen,
To be replaced with bitter, angry tears,
Of a life gone wrong.
You say you know me...
You know NOTHING of me.
I might as well be dead.
Have you ever lived life in total darkness?
My life with you has been so dark and cold,
Death would be a welcomed warmth to my soul.
~Me
In a world where all is borrowed, and time like elusive dust seems to just slip through our fingers, all we really have are these precious moments where we can make fertile the soil in the garden of our hearts, that here love may make its home and here the mortal seed may flourish. Only love can free us from the womb of time, for life like a magnificent mysterious cloud holds its shape and form only long enough for us to blink and all our precious memories are but shadows of time that will drift away like fallen leaves returning to the emptiness from which they came. Thus we are like innocent children flowering...in the garden of souls.
~Me
To let your mind wander is a glorious thing,
But to lose it,
That creates the ultimate journey...
A search for your sanity.
*smiles & swallows my lithium*
Everyday the hole in my heart grows.
Everday the silence grows harder to bear.
All of the hurt is shoved down my throat,
Til I choke and turn blue.
Cold Death.
Why the fuck do I live everyday?
Why the fuck do I scream unheard?
Why do I fall deeper into despair?
Why do I feel?
Cold Death.
Fuck this life, it's a waste of my time.
Fuck the shrinks and their "help".
I turned bad and then worse.
Now I'm a monster who thirsts.
Are you feeling it yet?
Cold Death.
Turning the page, a new chapter in life.
Each one worse than before.
Feel the cold fingers clinching your throat.
Join me my heart, in...
Cold Death.
I am lost,
I am dying.
I scream in despair.
No one reached out when I asked.
Now I am a monster searching for prey.
Do you feel me coming?
I am Cold Death.
~Me
Remember me not when I am gone away.
Gone far away into the silent night.
When you can no longer hold me by the hand.
...You understand...
Yet if you should forget me for a time
And afterwards remember, do not grieve.
Better by far you should forget and smile,
Than that you should remember and be sad...
~Me
The incision is made.
I give my blood to bring you near.
False intentions.
Acts invoke thoughts of insincerity.
Hopeless journey.
I give with no reward.
Taking my life force to feed the monster.
Weakened by a game just played.
The pain of misjudgment.
The pain of time wasted.
The poison flows.
Black deception.
Cold empty embrace.
Misunderstood in a world of fools.
Dread of the universe.
Nirvana escapes me.
Betrayal is the knife that cuts ever so deep.
Confused and abandoned...
~Me
I am...
Twisted, uplifted.
I will be...
Faceless, embraceless.
Can't you see my...
Hatred, dismantled from society as I am?
I don't need you by my side.
When I get close to you,
Just walk on by.
I should not be...
Blamed, ashamed, deranged, frustrated & aggrivated.
There isn't much I can say but...
"I'm Fine".
~Me
Looking to my own reflection,
Closing me eyes, for recollection.
Thoughts I get from suffering rejection.
Thoughts that are known only as I sleep.
I'm losing my mind from secrets I keep.
From the cliff of sanity I take my leave...
Starts with a cry...
Ends with a scream...
Before you know it...
You're watching,
Yourself...
Bleed.
~Me
Closer than I've ever been before,
These tears are swelling up inside of me,
Like a growing hurricane on wild stormy seas.
The waves wash over what's left of me,
And tear apart the world I've known.
Leaving behind a misty phantom,
Roaming a barren shore.
I've cried these endless tears before,
The growing rage inside of me.
Like rampant fires consuming living Earth,
The flames engulf me...ravish me,
And scourch the mental soul within the dream I call meself.
Leaving behind an pile of ashed fairy tales,
Where once a princess stood.
I've seen that look a thousand times before,
The look of love,
Like stars dancing around and about the moon.
On steamy, dreamy, summer nights.
The simple emotions flood over me,
As I wait expectantly for the pain I know is sure to come,
Protecting my heart...
Before the end draws near...
~Me
Broken Glass,
Pretty.
Glistening.
Cold,
Scratchy fragments in my wrists.
Hemlock elixer,
Sweet poison to my soul...
One more swallow ought to do.
Bed of Nails,
Could it get anymore comforting?
Sharpened stake,
To cure my heart of this disease.
Crucifix?!?!?!
What the hell??? I don't believe!!
Bloody knife in my hand,
I thought I ditched it when last I used it??
Coffin of mine,
Awwww, my lovely bed of solace...where I dwell for eternity.
Memories of how I spent my life,
recieving pain and torture.
And giving it...
~Me
Come, let us away-
Going lower everyday,
What much fun it is to race,
Down to find the lowest place.
This the dearest law we know-
"It is happy to go low."
Sweetest urge and sweetest will,
"Let us go down lower still."
Hear the summons night and day,
Calling us to come away.
From the heights we leap and flow,
To the valleys down below.
Always answering to the call,
To the lowest place of all.
Sweetest urge and sweetest pain,
To go low and rise again.
~Me
It could be about all me fairies...or it could be about oral sex...whatever ya like. LOL! I slay me.
My love is hidden from me,
Where the barley feels the rain.
For the seasons turn above him,
As his body feeds the grain.
Who am I without him?
Where am I but by his side?
Will the seasons turn above me,
With his body next to mine?
I can taste you in the water,
Sweet as honey to me tongue.
I can hear you whisper
through the barley,
Like a song as yet unsung...
I've been broken and torn apart,then put back together again. Today, I've noticed...I've had enough. I can't take anymore, I won't take anymore. Emotions way too intense to sort through...Tied up tight, ready to explode. Trying to go through door after door, just to get them all slammed in me face. Raped of all desire, shredded pieces of me, broken and pained...it is known all too well...
~Me
tearing into the day
cutting into the pain
restless thoughts
all this time
of hearts
of minds
of distance...our distance.
grasping a thought
of you
of me
of us
painful depths
within...without
your heart
my heart
you.
where I forever
hold you...
you alone
falling into
the unknown
bathing in your love
drinking the sky in a sip
covering me in the warmth of your eyes
stripping each pained layer away
by the touch of your hand
the timeless seconds of desire
for you
bare and succulant to my touch
the pain of seperation
the bliss of togetherness
where time ends with you
and light seems dim
caressing darkness
caressing you
forever
~me
Thoughts are growing in my mind,
Tonight I lie alone,
Stains of memories smear my dreams.
I know I won’t be sleeping this night.
Keeping care of my last hope that lies in my hand.
Tiny shards of wishes that strive to keep me sane these days.
Like stars, my wishes shine.
They want you—
They covet the others...
And I dream to be away.
My dreams die,
But still,
Constantly,
They shine,
But dimly still.
Maybe tonight,
Since sleep will not come,
And away from the wishes
Away from the eye of my dreams,
I will hide.
The broken pieces of nothing,
I cling to this one desire...
I’m attached to the hope that,
Perhaps I may never wake again.
Faint smile across my face,
To live the life I painted for myself in my dreams.
And before my very eyes,
The life I conceived in my dreams
Will die,
Like me, in this reality I was forced to live.
Just as the stars are forced to burn the night alive.
~Me
Stumble!