The Moonward Way, How I got started.
"Mary Queen of Heaven"
This image, which I found on the Internet, most closely resembles the Statue on my Grandmother's Shrine
May 4th, 1966
I will always remember this day.
It was the day my Grandmother passed into her next life.
It was also my brothers 5th Birthday,
(That is how I remember the exact date.
And In about 6 weeks I would turn 7
And interestingly enough,
I discovered through an online moon phase calendar.
http://www.moonconnection.com/moon_phases_calendar.phtml
That it was also a Full Moon.
It was also the day
That I began following
The Path of the Goddess.
In the weeks leading up to my Grandmothers Passing
I could see, hear and feel the concerns that were plaguing the adults around me.
She had cancer and the last days in her mortal body were full of pain and confusion.
I had come up with my mother to the Family Home in Kirkfield
And if I remember correctly, my brother was at home with my dad.
My Grandmother was in a hospital in Lindsay
And everyday the adults would go back and forth to visit her.
At the time, either because my mother didn't want me to see her suffering
Or as she told me "The Hospitals has a policy of not let children visit.
I was not allowed to join them in their Vigil.
None the less I could her pain and torment through their words.
And the words they chose not to speak.
There hearts were breaking.
They hated to see her suffer like that.
And they were saying things like
"Death would be a Mercy."
"I think it is time for her to go."
and "Please take her now."
But somehow along with these words
There was an overwhelming sense of guilt
That they would even be thinking such things.
My response was to think "How can I help?"
So when the day came that I was alone in the house
While the rest had gone to visit
I went to the small shrine she kept to the Lady
On the table was a small statue of Mary
Standing on the Moon and Crowned in a halo of stars
Her arms were open wide and inviting
And somehow I knew she would answer if I called.
So I picked up the old black Rosary,
Knelt down and just held it for a while.
I felt that I should say it
But I wasn't sure how.
I knew the basics, almost any child raised Catholic did.
I had learned by rote the prayers and intentions that were meant to be used.
But until that day, I always thought of it as least boring,
And at the most torturous as we were forced to recite it.
In fact, until that day, my brother and I would have races
To see who could recite it the fastest.
And I can tell you from experience
That the Hail Mary in overdrive
Sounds more like bees buzzing than a prayer,
And so as I knelt there thinking
I heard a soft voice say
Say each of the prayers as you know them
Slowly and with reverence
And as you finish each add your request.
And so
I thought about what I should ask for
And how.
And so I formed my intention
It went something like this.
"If it is her time
Please take her now
If it is not
Please ease the pain."
And so I began
And with each prayer
I could feel the presence
That accompanied that we small voice
Grow, until it was both within me and without me.
And within that presence I understood
That it was my grandmothers time to leave
And all that she was waiting for
Was someone to see her off.
Sometime during this
I drifted into Vision
And I could see my Grandmother
Standing before me,
With the same Welcoming gesture
As the Lady had.
But when she spoke
Her voice was laden with concern
"But she is still just a child."
And I could hear the presence answer her
"She's the only one her heard the call."
And so she turned and took my hand
And we began a Journey.
We walked along a wooded path for a while
Until we reached a small wooden cottage
That sat nestled in the trees
Just to the right of the path.
And as we passed, she said come here
Whenever you are in need of wisdom.
Further along the path
We reached a an opening in the tree's
That surrounded a plain
Covered in Grass and Wildflowers.
And at the centre was
A place for fire.
And as we passed, she said come here
When you are in need of Help.
And still further along
The Path began to fade
And we reached the edge
Of a Great Body of Water,
A lake I think.
And when we stood before it
She said come here
When you are in need of solace.
And as she spoke
The great water seemed to narrow
And a bridge appeared
And she turned to me gently
And said
"My child,
This is a far
As You can go
I'll be Okay from here.
And so I
Slowly began to return from Vision
And continued to say the lay.
And just as I set down
The rosary again
I could hear
The family return.
And as they entered
I could hear them say
That Mercy
Had visited them that day.
Written by
Raven Lynn Brown
October, 5, 2009
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