More to come
Dean Winchester: Besides, if I ran off with you, I think your mother might kill me.
Jo Harvelle: You're afraid of my mother?
Dean Winchester: I think so.
Sam Winchester: So I'm a freak now.
Dean Winchester: You've always been a freak.
Andrew Gallagher: Tell the truth.
Sam Winchester: That's what I'm...
Dean Winchester: We hunt demons.
Andrew Gallagher: What?
Sam Winchester: Dean.
Dean Winchester: Demons. Spirits. Things your worst nightmares wouldn't even touch. Sam here is my brother.
Sam Winchester: Dean, shut up!
Dean Winchester: I'm trying. He's psychic, kinda like you. Well, not really like you, but, see, he thinks you're a murderer, and he's afraid he's going to become one himself, because you're all part of something that's terrible, and I hope the hell he's wrong, but I'm starting to get a little bit scared that he might be right.
Det. Peter Sheridan: Talk directly to the camera. Start by stating your name for the record.
Dean Winchester: My name is Dean Winchester. I'm an Aquarius, I enjoy sunsets, long walks on the beach and frisky women. And I did not kill anyone. But I know who did. Or rather "what" did. Of course, it can't be for sure, because our investigation was interrupted. But our work in theory, is that were looking for some kind of Vengeful Spirit.
Det. Diana Ballard: Excuse me?
Dean Winchester: You know, Casper - the blood thirsty ghost.
Dean Winchester: So Scully... what do ya think?
Sam Winchester: I'm not Scully, you're Scully
Dean Winchester: Naw... I'm Mulder... You're a red headed woman
Sam Winchester: Well, we've got to salt and burn her bones. Its the only way to put her spirit to rest.
[
Smiles widely]
Det. Diana Ballard: [
Deadpan] Of course it is.
Sam Winchester: Dude, dude, I am not using this ID!
Dean Winchester: Why not?
Sam Winchester: Because it says "Bikini Inspector" on it!
John Winchester: Lock the doors and windows, close the shades, and most important...
Young Dean: Watch out for Sammy.
[
He looks over at Sam who is watching tv]
John Winchester: All right, if somethin' tries to bust in?
Young Dean: Shoot first, ask questions later.
[
John puts a hand on his son's shoulder]
John Winchester: That's my man.
Dean Winchester: [
Dean is a spirit and can't be heard] Dude you need to find some voodoo priest to lay some mojo on me.
Sam Winchester: [
Talking to his dad] I don't know, I'll just find some voodoo priest and lay some mojo on him.
Dean Winchester: I think i'll pass the 72 virgins, thanks. i'm not that into prude chicks anyway.
Tessa: That's funny.You're very cute.
Dean Winchester: You ever watch daytime TV? It's terrible.
Sam Winchester: I talked to your doctor...
Dean Winchester: That fabric softener teddy bear... oooh, I'm gonna hunt that little bitch down.
Dean Winchester: You better take care of that car. Or, I swear, I'll haunt your ass.
Sam Winchester: I don't think that's funny.
Dean Winchester: Oh come on, it's a little funny
Sam Winchester: Dean! This is a very serious investigation. We don't have time for any of your blah blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah. Blah... blah blah blah. Blah blah blah blah. BLAH!
Sam Winchester: Dude, did you touch my laptop?
Dean Winchester: Err...No.
Sam Winchester: Yeah? Then why is it stuck to bustyasianbeau
ties.com?
Sam Winchester: You're bossy.
Dean Winchester: What?
Sam Winchester: [says slowly] You're bossy... and short hahaha.
Dean Winchester: Are you drunk?
Sam Winchester: Yeah, so... stupid.
Dean Winchester: Of course, the most troubling question is: "Why do these people assume we're gay?"
Sam Winchester: Well, you are kinda butch, but I just think you're overcompensating.
Dean Winchester: Wow! This is a lot of dolls. They're nice...They're not super creepy at all.
Sam Winchester: Hey Dean... what I said earlier, about mom and dad, I'm sorry...
Dean Winchester: [raises hand to stop Sam] No chick flick moments.
Sam Winchester: Alright... jerk.
Dean Winchester: Bitch.
Dean Winchester: House rules, Sammy. Driver picks the music. Shotgun shuts his cake hole.
Sam Winchester: Sammy is a chubby 12 year old. It's Sam okay.
Dean Winchester: Sorry, cant hear you. The music's too loud.
Dean Winchester: Nice work, Sammy.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, wish I could say the same thing about you. What were you thinking shooting Casper in the face, you freak!
Dean Winchester: Hey, saved your ass!
Deputy: So, fake US Marshall, fake credit cards. You got anything that's real?
Dean Winchester: My boobs...
Deputy: [slamming Dean on the hood of his car] You have the right to remain silent...
Haley Collins: So, really, I don't know how to thank you.
[Dean smirks]
Haley Collins: Must you cheapen the moment?
Dean Winchester: Yeah!
[Dean falls on top of Sam as they sneak through a half open window]
Dean Winchester: Oh, sorry!
Sam Winchester: OK, be quiet.
Dean Winchester: Me be quiet? You be quiet!
Dean Winchester: I hope your apple pie is freakin' worth it!
Sam Winchester: Dean, there's ten times as much lore about angels as there is about anything else we've ever hunted.
Dean Winchester: You know what, there's a ton of lore on unicorns too. In fact, I hear that they ride on silver moonbeams, and that they shoot rainbows out of their ass!
Sam Winchester: Wait, there's no such thing as unicorns?
Dean Winchester: [Looking at the haunted hotel] We might even run into Fred and Daphne inside. Mmmm... Daphne. Love her.
Dean Winchester: Come on man. I know Sam, ok? Better than anyone. He's got more of a conscience than I do. I mean the guy feels guilty searching the internet for porn.
Dean Winchester: I'm not gonna die in a hospital where the nurses aren't even hot.
Dean Winchester: [Sam points to a word carved into a telephone pole] Croatoan?
Sam Winchester: Yeah.
[Dean stares blankly]
Sam Winchester: Roanoke... lost colony... ring a bell? Dean, did you pay any attention in history class?
Dean Winchester: Yeah. Shot heard 'round the world, how bills become laws...
Sam Winchester: That's not school; that's schoolhouse rock!
Dean Winchester: Ya' know she could be faking.
Sam Winchester: Yeah, what do you wanna do, poke her with a stick?
[Dean nods]
Sam Winchester: Dude, you're not gonna poke her with a stick?
Dean Winchester: Damn cops.
Sam Winchester: They were just doing their job.
Dean Winchester: No, they were doing our job, only they don't know it so they suck at it.
Dean Winchester: [after a nice cop says okie dokie] I like him, he says okie dokie.
Sam Winchester: Kids are great.
Dean Winchester: Yeah I love kids.
Sam Winchester: Name three kids you actually know.
[Dean scratches his head]
McG: Marty, what do you think?
Martin: Not married to salt, what do you want? still sticking with condiments?
McG: Just sounds different, not better. What else would a ghost be scared of?
Walter Dixon: Aww, ya gotta be kidding me.
Martin: [Aside] What would a ghost be scared of?
[to McG]
Martin: Maybe shotguns.
McG: K, that makes even less sense than salt.
Sam Winchester: Why'd you let me fall asleep?
Dean Winchester: Because I am an awesome brother. What did you dream about?
Sam Winchester: Lollipops and candycanes.
Dean Winchester: This looks like a zombie pen, Sammy.
Sam Winchester: Well, before we go stabbing things into Cooper, we're gonna wanna make damn sure it's him.
Dean Winchester: You're such a stickler for details, Sammy.
[A midget walks towards Sam at a fairground, stops in front of him and stares him up and down for a while before she smirks and walks away as Dean approaches]
Dean Winchester: Did you get her number?
Stumble!
