_{Letters to Strangers}

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To faith,

As far as holidays go, my family has never been much on the celebratory status. We do the "family" ones on occasion - the general gathering of a few people for Thanksgiving, and a sort of broken-up, disjointed, neglected fashion for Christmas since no one really likes each other here. Halloween used to be celebrated when we didn't live in the boonies - but now that we live in the middle of nowhere, trick-or-treating is like a daily ordeal when you go on knock on you neighbors door. They open the door, you see either Frankenstein or a zombie, or, well, frankly, Hannibal Lectar. And that's a day-to-day thing. We never really did St. Paddy's day, have never, ever ever, celebrated New Years, and only once have we celebrated Independence Day - me with a migraine in the cabin of a creaking sailboat, and the rest of the family either bored or drunk. That never happened again.

It wasn't until I sort of got adopted by this other family that I've actually experienced the natural, somewhat functional version of these Holidays - granted they're very Christian, and there is always the awkwardness of "Where do I look?" when they're doing grace, but as far as warm hospitality, good food, and generally an overwhelming sense of being happy goes, I've gotten the ripest bunch from the tree. And so, it is no doubt, that I call these people my God family, or, generally, my second half.

Now, instead of spending time cringing at the thought of celebrations, I'm often spending time in their house, helping cook or clean and celebrating with a bunch of strangers that eventually turn into familiar faces down the road. This happened, especially, with Easter.

Now, when I was much younger we did the Easter thing a few times. The ones I remember most seem very uneventful since I only remember small parts. There was one when my mother went though, what seemed like, a lot of work to cut out small bits of paper to fashion them as "Easter Bunny Paw Prints" and taped them down through the entire hallway leading up to my sister and my own candy-filled basket. Another I spent with my Grandmother, falling asleep in the grass during Mass, another which I spent collecting eggs on my Nana's old ranch, and an even vaguer one which I only remember through a photograph of my sister and I in frilly dresses, squinting into the sunshine, and enduring the pain of a forced hug (I only remember this as Easter because I have a scratch on my face in the photograph, and I remember it being from a small dog). But, now, as it is, we are older, and have never done anything as far as it goes. Not even for the younger bouts in the family, I think we've just given up on the aspect of the Easter Bunny. But, even that being said, I still thoroughly enjoyed spending Easter at "Home".

Granted, it was sort of a painful thing at first - and awkward. I was invited to my "Aunt's" house through my God family, and it was just a small thing. We watched The Incredibles, gorged on Spinach and Warm Crab dip, and while the "Adults" played a strange, nameless game on my part, the gathering of four teenagers there got incredible creative while dying eggs. I had done none of this for a grand total of, I believe, eight years.

And I don't think that Holiday's should be ended simply because the Faith in a creature was diminished. I don't think this really works with Christmas, though, seeing as how we deem it a "Family" thing, but to my family, Easter died, rolled in its' grave for years, and finally lit itself on fire after we discovered the overall absence of the Easter Bunny.

I know, however, that it's because of that absence of the holiday as to why I enjoyed it this year so much, but it's the same way with a lot of things, now. My family doesn't do Halloween - even when we stopped trick or treating we stopped carving pumpkins, having Hallows' Eve dinners, no more parties, no friends came over.

I think, to me, yesterday I learned a lesson that I'll keep with me for awhile.

Just because you stop believing, doesn't mean to simply stop. Sometimes playing pretend is all we've got left.