Confessions of Yagami, Hikari – Prologue
 
The sky began to darken as she sat on the edge of the concrete sidewalk, feet sprawled out in a comfortable position in the street. A little boy clung helplessly to her chest, afraid to let go, afraid of almost everything, but mostly afraid that he would lose her again.
 
She looked down at the boy, who was so helplessly fragile, as she waited for him to show up. The boy was small, with blonde naturally highlighted hair and deep silver colored eyes. She knew that soon his features would shift from natural to something strange, but the thought didn’t worry her.
 
He looked up at her and she found herself staring down into his cloudy silver eyes. He was only about three, able to talk but not very well. He muttered an incoherent word to her and she nodded her head in response.
 
As she looked down at his features she couldn't help but think fondly of him, even though he was the mistake that almost ruined her life.

Chapter one; Discovery-

The music, the lighting and the crowd of two thousand plus people was almost hypnotic once I got used to it. It almost felt like an addiction, and staring at the blonde haired lead singer was just part of the addiction.

Her best friend, Yolie intercepted her thoughts by tugging on her pink blouse. “WHAT?” I yelled above the music and the screaming crowd. The teenage wolves were playing tonight, and I had gotten tickets from my brother Tiachi and his girlfriend Sora who had decided that they would rather not go.
 
“I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM! COME WITH ME!” Yolie yelled back, tugging me in the direction of the bathroom. I stood idly in front of the mirror while Yolie took care of business. I didn't even notice when the door swung open and another girl came striding in.
 
“Hey Kari” The girl said, reapplying some cheap lipstick in front of the mirror. I forced a smile. It was Sora, my brother’s girlfriend.

I didn't hate Sora, per-say. I just did not like the fact that she was playing both my brother and his best friend at the same time, or the fact that everyone always compared me to her when in reality, we didn't look that much alike. Did I mention she was sleeping with two guys at the same time? “Hey Sora, what are you doing here?” I asked, trying to be casual.

The story Tai had given me when he gave me the concert tickets this morning was that him and Sora needed some ‘alone’ time, and he figured that tonight would be a good night to be alone and do whatever disturbing things it was that Sora and Tai did when they were alone.
 
“Oh, your brother and I are just spending some time apart.” Sora answered, not looking at me. I figured they probably broke up and Tai didn't want to admit it. It wouldn’t take them long to get back together.

Yolie came out of the bathroom stall and smiled at the red-haired girl “Hi Sora” She greeted. Sora just smiled at her, then left the bathroom. “Didn't we get these tickets from her?” Yolie asked, glancing at me.
 
“We did” I said, before walking back out into the crowd. The concert didn't last much longer, and Yolie and I found ourselves ambling out to the parking lot to find my brother who had promised to pick us up, since I wouldn’t be getting my drivers license for another few months now. His black Toyota was sitting out front, just as he had promised.
 
“Hey Tiachi!” Yolie greeted as I slid into the back seat.

“Hey girls” Tai said with a yawn. During the day, Tai worked as a police officer and it tended to tire him out. I smiled at him sympathetically. “So are you staying over today, Yolie?” He asked while pulling out of the stadium parking lot.
 
“I think my parents are expecting me home.” Yolie answered. Tai just nodded and drove off in the direction of her home. Yolie only lived a few minutes from the stadium, but Tiachi and I lived a good two hours or so away from the outskirts of town. We had just recently moved after our father’s un-timely death.
 
We pulled up in front of her house and she jumped out “Bye you guys! See you at school on Monday, Kari!” She waved as I got into the front seat.
 
“Yeah, see you later Yolie!” I said, smiling at her.

Once she was safely inside the house my brother turned to face me “I don’t think I am going to make it home tonight, Kari. Matt said we could bunk at his house, do you mind?” He asked. Anything to avoid letting me drive his car I suppose. Oh well.
 
“Yeah sure Tai.” I said. I was pretty tired myself and spending the night at my boyfriends temporary home didn't sound so bad.
 
We pulled up in front of the rundown apartments and trekked up to number 107 on floor five. Tai pressed the doorbell impatiently. Takaru Takashi (Matt’s younger brother) answered the door. “Hey” He greeted, looking slightly confused. “I didn't know you were coming” He said, directing the comment at Tai but looking at me.

“Your brother knew.” Tai explained, brushing T.K. aside.

I greeted T.K “Hey, how's it going?” I said. T.K, who usually lived with his mother, was now staying with Matt for a predetermined amount of time, because he and his little brother Mathew did not necessarily get along.

“I am doing ok” He answered, then without words led me to his room.
Tai yawned on the couch, fighting sleep until Matt arrived. “Hey” Matt greeted, digging in the closet and throwing a pillow and blanket at Tai.
 
“Hey Matt, I know I said I would try and make it home but I am dead tired.” Tai said, stretching out on the couch.

“What did you do with Kari?” Matt asked.

Tai rolled his eyes “How the hell should I know? She must be back there with T.K. or something.” Tai said, shrugging.

“Whatever” Matt answered, disappearing into his room. It only took Tai a few minutes to fall asleep on the couch.

THE NEXT MORNING

Tai woke up around eight to a ringing sound. He slowly opened his eyes and found Matt, who was attempting to hold his pants up while jumping around the messy apartment with a spoon in his mouth, desperately looking for the now ringing phone.
 
I had rolled out of bed a few moments earlier and found the phone sitting under a pizza box with a large pepperoni grease stain on it. “Hello, Ishida residence” I answered. The voice coming from the other end was not one I wanted to hear “No, I am sorry he is not here right now, call back later. Thank you. Goodbye.” I clicked the phone off.

Both boys were staring at me. “Who was it?” Tai asked.

“Sora.” I answered before turning on my heel and entering the bathroom.

“God damnit…” Matt said “I should have known.” He then continued his somewhat sloppy morning routine as if nothing had happened.

LATER ON THAT DAY-
 
I walked down the street, my subconscious was leading me to the soccer field, but my mind was straying elsewhere. I had come to watch Davis and Ken play soccer, like I usually did. I climbed up into the bleachers and to-my-horror saw Sora, sitting a few rows below me.

I prayed that she didn't spot me, but naturally she turned around and noticed me. “Hey Hikari, nice to see you!” She greeted, feigning friendliness. Sora did not like me anymore than I liked her, though I don’t know why. I wasn’t sleeping with her boyfriend and his best friend at the same time.

“If you don’t mind, it is just Kari please” I corrected. I hated the name Hikari, it was too formal. “What are you doing here?” I asked her. She was usually a cheerleader for the high school team, and would normally be out on the field warming up for her cheerleading practice about now.
 
“Well actually they fired me from the team and got a new girl. I thought I would come and watch to see how good she was.” Sora said, glancing down at the new auburn haired cheerleader. Kari hoped her brother would notice the new girl. Maybe she could help him get over his obsession with Sora.
 
“Sorry to hear that” I said, looking back up at Sora. Sometimes I wondered if there was such a thing as ‘too nice’ and if so, was I one of those people?

“Thanks. So I will see you around then, unless you want to sit with me?” Sora asked, looking me up and down. I wondered what she was looking at.
 
“No…I um…am supposed to be meeting someone here.” I lied. It was only a little lie. I was meeting Davis after the game for victory smoothies, but Sora didn't need to know that.
 
“Oh ok, enjoy the game.” Sora said, skipping back down the bleachers. Not long after that, Sora disappeared completely which in some cases was good. It meant she wouldn’t catch me in the lie. The game only took like an hour or so. Davis and his team won, automatically entering themselves in the playoffs.

Davis met me down on the field after the game. When I found him he was talking to the new cheerleader, whose name was Brittany. Apparently she had transferred from America and was an amazing cheerleader. She smiled at me as I approached. “Hey, you must be Hikari! It is so nice to meet you.” She said.

I smiled back at her “Nice to meet you to.” I said. Davis informed me that his mom called and he wouldn’t be able to go with me to get smoothies. He apologized, but I didn’t really mind. After Davis left I stuck around to talk to Brittany for a bit. She was very kind, and seemed really smart. I would have to introduce her to my brother later. Eventually Tai called and forced me to drag myself out to his car so he could drive us back to our isolated home in the Tokyo countryside.
 
The drive home was silent for the most part, but it was awkward silence. Eventually I thought of something to say “I saw Sora today. She was at the soccer game; apparently she was kicked off the cheerleading team and replaced by a girl named Brittany.” I informed him, picking at my fingernails.

“Really?” Tai seemed slightly uninterested. “I met Brittany too, earlier today. She locked her keys in the car and I helped her out.” He said.

“Were you working at the time?” I asked, curiously. I could see Tai out there, attempting to pick a car lock in a police uniform. The image made me giggle.

“What's so funny?” He asked, chuckling along with me “Yeah I was working.” He answered. We finally got home, only to discover that our mother wasn't home either. I sighed. Ever since our father’s untimely death, I hadn't seen much of my mother. It bothered me, but there was not much I could do for her. She wouldn’t ever talk about his death, she just kept locked up in her room all by herself.

Tai jumped onto the couch and began watching TV and I retired to my room. I was feeling odd and a little sick, and had begun fearing the worst. It had been two weeks since I should have had my period. Finally I got tired of fidgeting and went downstairs. “Is mom home yet?” I asked Tai. He was watching some stupid cop show on television and was completely zoned out.

“Haven’t seen her” He answered, not bothering to look at me.
 
“Alright, I am going to take the van and go to the convenience store down the road. I will be back in a minute.” I said, heading out the door.
 
Tai eyed me suspiciously, but he didn't say anything more than “Not home in an hour and I am coming to get you.” Which seemed to be his answer for everything. Not that I could say much, most of the time I enjoyed my brothers over protectivness. It tended to come in handy in tight situations.
 
It didn't take me long to make it back from the store. Tai was snoring his way through another boring TV show as I made my way up to the bathroom. I dumped the pregnancy test that I had just purchased down on the counter.

The instructions were simple. Red = negative blue = positive. I followed the procedure and left the little stick on the cabinet to calculate my results. My stomach had begun to churn, and bile rose in my throat. When the time was up, I had to force myself to get up and look at it.

I gulped. It was blue. Before I knew what had happened, I passed out and hit the floor.

Tai heard a thud coming from the bathroom and rushed in. The contents of the test were spread out on the tile floor. He immediately began throwing it all away so that his mother would not find it. Once most of the contents were disposed of, he picked up the last piece, along with his little sister and walked her to the bedroom. He tucked her in and sighed, going back into the living room.
 
He pressed his two fingers to his temple and thought ‘Tomorrow is going to be a long day.’ He chunked the last evidence of her pregnancy test into the trash and fell asleep on the couch…



confessions of Yagami, Hikari chapter two
confessions of Yagami, Hikari chapter three
confessions of Yagami, Hikari chapter four
confessions of Yagami, Hikari chapter five
confessions of Yagami, Hikari chapter six
confessions of Yagami, Hikari chapter seven
confessions of Yagami, Hikari chapter eight
confessions of Yagami, Hikari chapter nine
confessions of Yagami, Hikari chapter ten