Pet

Every child has his or her own bogies, incarnate in a variety of forms. They might be hairy things living in the closet or under the bed, or slimy creatures that creep in and out from cracks in the ceiling. They might be something seen on TV and transferred to real life, lurking outside the house. Possibilities are endless. What they all have in common is that they are scary, causing children to be afraid of the dark, rendering them unable to sleep if there is no one to chase the monsters away with their presence. Me, however - I had a slightly different monster taking residence in my room. I haven't seen the little thing in ages, and to be honest, I forgot all about it during my last years in elementary school. But still I remember it as clearly as yesterday...

The first time I met him was when I was playing hide-and-seek with my cousins. If I'm not completely mistaken, I was five whereas my cousins were three, seven and eleven, respectively. Me and the youngest one of the bunch decided to go hide in the huge attic of my family's house, figuring that it would take forever to find us, even if the seeker this round was the eldest. Muffling giggles in our small palms we entered the cool space, closed the infernally creaking door behind us, and proceeded to search for proper hiding places among the cardboard boxes and old furniture littered along the walls. I pushed the little gnat behind a box and made sure he wouldn't follow me further - I couldn't stand him, really, and it annoyed me to no end that I was always assigned as his guardian just because his siblings couldn't be bothered - then continued on my way to the very back of the attic. Judging from the ecstatic giggles coming from behind me, my cousin had already found something to occupy him. Good for the brat. I finally decided to go behind a large, very worn and very ugly sofa. It looked like no one would dare even poke it with a stick in fear of encountering endless amounts of dust and spiders.

Well, instead of, or rather, in addition to the beforementioned things, I found it. At the time, it took me some moments to figure out just what the round glowing orbs before me in the darkness were. Abnormally bright green eyes. Staring. Right at me. I stared back, fascinated, forgetting that little girls are supposed to scream when seeing something scary. The thing is, I didn't find the creature very terrifying. More like... cute. It was pretty funny-looking, with a head faintly reminiscent of that of a feline, fur the colour of all possible different shades of brown with a couple of white spots here and there, and long red claws instead of fingers. It stood upright, although a bit hunched, and it was only a little shorter than me. While I gaped at it, the creature blinked at me, letting out a series of yips, mews and barks. My cousin continued on whatever he was doing, oblivious to what was going on at my end of the attic. An ear-splitting grin appeared on my face.

It was love at first sight.

After that, the creature followed me everywhere. No one else ever saw it, and after a while, I gave up trying to point it out to my cousins - or my adult relatives, for that matter. They all just patted my head and smiled a syrupy sweet smile, saying how my imagination was so big. I, the brilliant and inventive five-year-old that I was, named it 'Pet'. Pet lived wherever it fancied, moving from my clothes closet to under my bed to the box where I held my toys at a moment's whim. Although I never quite learned to understand what its various noises meant, I think it enjoyed the time spent with me, listening to me go on and on about kindergarten and later on, school, my friends, family, homework - practically, everything but the sink. I read books aloud to it, tried to teach it words of the human language; everything you can think of, I probably did with my monster. Pet even affected my choice of music, immediately letting out a terrible screech if it didn't happen to like something.

Oh, those days... Pet really was my only true friend, that's what it often felt like. I wonder when it was that I started seeing my little monster with increasing rarity. I think I remember, now...

I had just entered seventh grade, was going through puberty and had more thoughts to boys and make-up and movies than Pet. My room had gone through a major renovation - the largest change being that in the place of my old, nice, hauntable bed was now a loft bed, complete with a desk and shelves. There was no more a place for a monster to hide under it. Also my toy box had been carried up to the attic. I couldn't comprehend the reason for Pet's sudden sulking attacks, so I just shrugged my shoulders and ignored it right back. I never even talked to it like I used to, anymore.

Now I see that its developing a bad habit was a protest, an attempt to get my full attention again. One day, I woke up as usual, went through my morning rituals and got ready for school - only to notice that the other of the pair of socks I had laid out the previous evening was missing. Now, this is nothing too peculiar. Everyone mysteriously loses socks occasionally. But when it started happening more and more often, I got suspicious. I tried to interrogate Pet, ask whether it had been playing with my clothes. My only answer was the blinking of those huge green eyes, and, exasperated, I gave up.

Then, one morning, I caught it red-handed.Returning from breakfast, I heard munching noises from my closet and went to investigate. There Pet was, eating my sock, something suspiciously looking like tears flowing across its face. I, the mature teenager that I was, threw a fit and told the monster to get out and never touch anything of mine again. After that, its visits grew infrequent, and eventually, it disappeared altogether.

I'm now finishing my last year of university, have a wonderful and devoted husband, and bearing a child. Often I find myself thinking of Pet, missing the little monster, and hoping that I would have been just a little wiser, a little more understanding. I also hope that when my baby is born, only a few weeks from now, Pet will return to me and give me a new chance by befriending my daughter.

Please come back, Pet, my little monster friend. I know you still follow me around - I've seen you in the corner of my eye so many times I cannot be mistaken. Give me another chance on being best friends with a bogie.








Blessings of the muse