It was cold and dark, the day I met the Puppet master. At the moment, I didnt know who he was. Or what he had in store. For two years he would pose as a counsler. And just like a dog is loyal to its masters, I'd make my weekly visits. He seemed like a normal person. He seemed to understand what I was going through. And after about a month, he knew my whole past. But I still never knew his name.
His hair was as blonde as the suns rays. His eyes were piercing green in colour. Everything about him, was a mystery. And yet, I found myself slowly falling in love with him. Yet, I still didnt know his name. It was as if, he could hear my thoughts as lay on that couch. He looked directly at me, and said "Jack" His voice was soft. And almost breathtaking.
If you could have just heard his voice, if even for a second, your knees too would melt. And his eyes....I swear if they were pools of water, I would drown in them. And oddly enough, I would have been happy. Even....even in death.
And then, agian, as if he could hear my thoughts, he said "Welcome Emma.." he then took my hand in his, and lightly kissed it, "I hope your week was good." he continued. I blushed. I didnt mean to, but I did. Every time he kissed my hand, I would blush. He was the first
guy man, that ever treated me with so much respect.
About a year after seeing him as a counsler, we started dating. And even after a year of friendship, I still got weak in the knees when he was around me.
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I've never before seen such beauty. Beatiful pale skin, raven dark curls. She was an Angel. And every time I saw her, I wanted to throw her down, and have my way with her. A feeling I've never felt towards another before. As I sat there, trying to pay attention to her words, I couldnt help but dream. A dream I shouldnt have been dreaming in the first place.
As I listened to her explain the events leading to her mothers death, I saw myself running my hands through her dark hair. Moving my hands to her cheeks, and then done to her waist. As my hands nervously fumbled with her pants button, she pulled me into a deep kiss. Finally! Her pants came un-done. And I started to kiss my way down her stomach as I slowly slid her pants down. As I made my way back up to her mouth, I pulled my shirt off, she already had hers off. And feeling her soft angelic skin touching mine, was almost orgasmic.
Emma stopped taking. And even though I was still somewhat in my dream, I knew she stopped talking. The room fell deadly silent. I blinked a few times, trying to gather my thoughts. I looked in her forget-me-not blue eyes, and softly said, "I'm so sorry for your lose." Emma nodded silently, I knew she was close to tears, so I offered her some tissue.
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I took the tissue greatfully, and managed to choke out the words "Thanks." I didnt want to cry in front of him. For me, crying was a strong sign of weakness. And I didnt want him thinking I was weak.
Ever since I was little, crying was a weakness. Thats what I knew. I sighed softly, and looked out the window. I couldn't think of anything else to say. Not without crying. I was having a hard enough time trying not to cry now. I jumped when I felt soft hands on my shoulders. When I turned around to see who was touching me, I saw Jack's smiling face, and his twinkling eyes. I saw the pain in his eyes. A pain I never once saw in his eyes. It caught me off guard. I went to say something, and he gently pressed one finger to my lips. We were only a breathe apart, and my heart was racing.
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Here we were, inches apart, just like in my daydream. All I had to do was move my fingers and kiss her deeply. I wanted to kiss her so badly. I wanted to feel her lips pressed against mine. I despretly wanted it too. But I looked deep in her eyes, and saw them swell up with tears. I could see that she was close to crying. I slowly removed my finger from her lips, and smiled inside when I felt her breath get heavy and faster. I knew from the sound of her breathing her heart had to have been racing. And I wondered if she wanted the same thing I did. We never done anything before. At least not with each other. It would be a magical romantic moment. But I knew this wasn't the time. So I pushed the thought far from my mind.
I looked even deeper in her eyes, and finally broke the silence. I told her, that if she wanted to cry, then she could use my shoulder. I knew instantly that what I said sounded stupid. I rethought what I said, trying to come up with something that didnt sound so stupid. in the mist of my thinking, I felt her body against mine. I shook my head, loosing my train of thought, and looked at her.
Her face was turned away from me, but I knew she was crying. It wasnt hard to tell, since the shoulder of my shirt was geting damp. I smiled slightly, and gently ran my hand up and down her back, in a soothing manner. I wanted her to know that I was there for her. I wanted her to know, without using words. Everyone says that actions speak louder than words. And it must be true, because the next thing I know, she has her arms around me tightly, and she's shaking slightly.
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21 years of holding back tears came out that moment. The tears I tryed so hard to fight back, I couldn't fight back anymore. A part of me no longer wanted to fight them back. I dont think that either of us expected what happened next. I finally stopped crying, and looked up at Jack. I smiled slightly, and the frowned when I still saw the pain in his eyes. I longed to know what casued his pain, but felt it rude to ask. And thought when he was ready, he would tell me the reason behind the sadness in his eyes.
He cupped my face in his hands, and I felt my cheeks heat up. he slowly moved his thumbs and wiped away the tears that stayed on my cheeks. Again I smiled slightly, and smiled more when he returned the smile. I laughed softly, and gently pulled away, wiping my cheeks dry. I folded my hands in my lap,not knowing what to say. Not knowing what to think. I realised that I cried. I showed weakness.
He surprised me when he placed his hands on mine. His once warm hands, were now as cold as ice. But they quickly warmed up, from the heat of mine. He smiled his usual sweet smile, and asked, "Do you feel better?" He said it softly, and understandingl
y. I nodded, and said "much better." I looked up at him, half excepting to see dissapointment in his eyes, but when I looked I saw happiness. Happiness that was covering up the sadness that I saw so often in his eyes.
I looked past him, and saw the clock. When my eyes adjusted, I realised that I overstayed, my visit. I looked back at him, and smiled slightly, "I've got to go, its getting late." He nodded, the sadness still hidden. I felt my heart break when I walked out of his office. I noticed he stood up, and walked over to the window. I wanted to stay, and see what he was looking at, but I figured it best I left. I slowly closed the door and headed outside.
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I stared out the window, and watched her walk down the street, like I did every time she left. I felt myself falling in love with her, and I was powerless to stop it. I knew I shouldnt have been mixing work with my personal life. But I was falling in love with Emma. I started to rethink the recent events. I replayed our last few moments in my head. I had her in my arms. I was holding her. And then she looked me in the eyes. Something not many people have done. What was she looking for? Was she even looking for something? I shook these questions out of my head, and then sat down.
I woke the next morning, still sitting at my work desk. I rubbed my eyes a bit, and looked to the clock. "9am," I said to myself, "I've got to get home, and shower." I collected a few things, and headed home. The whole drive home, I kept wondering about Emma. I wanted to know, what she was doing. What she was wearing. If she wanted company. I found myself always thinking about her, when she wasn't around. Everything reminded me of her.
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