Bears

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2009-12-26 09:10:29

Last author: Hedda
Owner: NOOOPE

# of watchers: 18

D20: 2

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"Bears kicks ass! By GOD. By GOD." - A young man of good intentions

Lately I have noticed something in regards to the world and it's state of being etc etc. BEARS. Yes. With a B, a B, a B-E-A-R-S. Bears. Frankly, my brothers in science, it can not be denied. There are bears, and they are here, on this planet, and they eat radiation. YES.

Let's say, well, let's say you were to meet a bear. What is it you would do besides die?

-Scream
-Weep
-Soil your pants

Spot on. BEARS. I say it again for drama's sake. Oh, what the drama. But listen here, my soul sisters! Could there be an alternative? TO BEAR DEATH? Dying... from Bears? Is there some vaccine you can take in case of a bear outbreak?

Yes and no. But mostly no. When facing a bear the best things to do are:

-Shoot yourself
-Hurl yourself off a cliff
-Smash your head in
-Overdose

This way the bear wont kill you. You will already be dead. Trust me, it is better that way.

EXTRA EXTRA! HEAR ALL ABOUT IT! ALEXANDER HAMILTON CHALLANGED A BEAR TO A DUEL, AND DIED

Literally, the word Bear means "Not a dog, a cat or anything not a bear". This must be taken into consideration.

Bears cannot be avoided. They hide around corners and wait.

"There was this time my aunt died. It was a'cause of Bears," - Someone you know.

You have no hope. A bear will kill you. Live each moment prepared for death.

2010-01-27 [windowframe]: http://theoatmeal.com/comics/ptero | http://theoatmeal.com/quiz/bear_balls

2010-01-28 [NOOOPE]: Fan-freakin-tastic!

2010-01-29 [Lothuriel]: Oh my GOOOSSSHHH!!! I so have to send that to like 5,000 people!

2010-02-12 [NOOOPE]: How many tons of shit would you ruin your pants with is you saw this walking around -> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76OgQ0iH_cA#t=55s

Or worse... slowly stalking you down a dark city street.

2010-02-12 [Hedda]: A four legged bear seems more dangerous to me...

2010-02-12 [NOOOPE]: Maybe more dangerous, but not nearly as disturbing.

2010-02-13 [Hedda]: I dare you to challenge me to find something way more disturbing on the Internet! <img:stuff/mood5-gif.gif>

2010-02-13 [NOOOPE]: Oh god.... I uh... I challenge... you... *cringes*

2010-02-13 [kay-chan]: Said the giant squid to the building.

2010-02-13 [NOOOPE]: Kay, you make life worth living.

2010-03-04 [NOOOPE]: <img:http://www.kyle-brady.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/yourenogentleman.jpg>

2010-03-04 [kay-chan]: Oh god DAMN M. Do you know how painful snorting chili is? Do you?!

2010-03-05 [Lothuriel]: <img:http://www.wordsandpicturesonline.com/images/Orangina_bear.jpg>

2010-03-05 [NOOOPE]: .. oh God...

2010-03-05 [Paul Doyle]: Ah yes, from the infamous furry Orangina commercial :P

2010-03-05 [Paul Doyle]: . . . and I hope the panda kicks Kid Rock's ass, though Mr. Peanut no longer has his monocle.

2010-03-21 [Lothuriel]: haha

2010-03-22 [Doormat]: http://www.thingsbearslove.com/ I'll just leave this here.

2010-04-13 [NOOOPE]: We were given a red piece of paper last Friday and told to do whatever we wanted with it and bring it back this Wednesday. This is what I did:

I have no idea what that Russian says.

2010-04-13 [Nioniel]:

LOVE IT!

2010-04-24 [kay-chan]: http://www.cracked.com/funny-3195-women-are-not-bears/ A whole page of awesome drawings. About bears. Killing you.

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