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Page name: Bears [Logged in view] [RSS]
2009-12-26 09:10:29
Last author: Hedda
Owner: NOOOPE
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"Bears kicks ass! By GOD. By GOD." - A young man of good intentions


Lately I have noticed something in regards to the world and it's state of being etc etc. BEARS. Yes. With a B, a B, a B-E-A-R-S. Bears. Frankly, my brothers in science, it can not be denied. There are bears, and they are here, on this planet, and they eat radiation. YES.

Let's say, well, let's say you were to meet a bear. What is it you would do besides die?

-Scream
-Weep
-Soil your pants

Spot on. BEARS. I say it again for drama's sake. Oh, what the drama. But listen here, my soul sisters! Could there be an alternative? TO BEAR DEATH? Dying... from Bears? Is there some vaccine you can take in case of a bear outbreak?

Yes and no. But mostly no. When facing a bear the best things to do are:

-Shoot yourself
-Hurl yourself off a cliff
-Smash your head in
-Overdose

This way the bear wont kill you. You will already be dead. Trust me, it is better that way.

EXTRA EXTRA! HEAR ALL ABOUT IT! ALEXANDER HAMILTON CHALLANGED A BEAR TO A DUEL, AND DIED


Literally, the word Bear means "Not a dog, a cat or anything not a bear". This must be taken into consideration.

Bears cannot be avoided. They hide around corners and wait.

"There was this time my aunt died. It was a'cause of Bears," - Someone you know.

You have no hope. A bear will kill you. Live each moment prepared for death.


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2007-03-20 [taintedvalor]: hahaha this is funny. delicious.

2007-04-12 [Lothuriel]: I think I might just advertise it as my Featured wiki next week...

2008-08-28 [Doormat]: "Goddamn Velociraptors," said Alan Grant. But the crowd was silent...in disagreement. It could be worse. It could be bears.

2008-08-28 [NOOOPE]: Velociraptors aren't so bad if you get to know them.

<img:http://i30.photobucket.com/albums/c307/HyacinthPrince/webcam.jpg>

2008-10-11 [Lothuriel]: Bears rock...

2008-10-11 [kay-chan]: If by "rock" you mean "are ruthless killing machines who will wear your ears as a necklace" then yes, you are absolutely 100% correct, [Lothuriel]. :3

And M... your raptor isn't fuzzy enough. XD

2008-10-12 [NOOOPE]: LIES!

2008-10-13 [kay-chan]: The ulnar papillae do not lie.

2008-10-13 [NOOOPE]: *Weeps* They look so stuuuuupid!!! Whyyyy?!!!

2008-10-13 [kay-chan]: Because aves are very closely related to Dinosauria. Dinosaurs might have just been the transition species.

And that one picture I showed you wasn't INCREDIBLY lame, only a little so. Plus they're mostly dead except for one Cuban-ish island, so it's not like they'll complain atcha or anything if you choose to ignore it.

2008-10-13 [Doormat]: Bears have gone on a scalping spree in mah area. Is it for trophy, OR DISGUISE?

Also, playing dead doesn't work anymore. THEY HAVE EVOLVED.

D:

2008-10-14 [Lothuriel]: So, this is what you get when you cross a bear and a Raptor...

<img:http://coweb.cc.gatech.edu/cs2340/uploads/5219/velociraptor_daniel.jpg>

2008-10-14 [NOOOPE]: GAAAAH!!!!!!

2008-10-14 [kay-chan]: AAAAAAH

2008-10-14 [NOOOPE]: SET IT ON FIRE!!

2008-10-14 [kay-chan]: NO IT'LL EAT YOUR FACE BEFORE YOU CAN REACH THE GASOLINE

2009-07-22 [Paul Doyle]: Da Bears! (SNL reference)

2009-07-22 [Paul Doyle]: (And it looks like the Furries are up to no good, yet again, judging by that plushie . . . )

2009-07-23 [kay-chan]: That's like saying the Pope is up to being Catholic yet again. When did he ever stop? Gorram furries. XD

2009-07-23 [Paul Doyle]: Is Gorram down the road from Gotham? Holy cow, Batman!

2009-07-24 [kay-chan]: Sweet fucking Jesus up the ass, Batman's a furry!

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