I feel my heart break,
With every sigh I make,
A lost friend,
A wounded love,
You'd think I'd learn,
To not come back,
TO stay away,
To run,
I never learn,
I always return,
He hurts me every time,
He knows I'll come back,
Thats why he wont care,
I wonder if I'll die soon,
I wonder if they'll know,
the reason that i've dies,
Is because he'd stole my soul,
I told him that I'd be there, 
He doesn't think I'll come,
Now I'm not sure I want to,
What have I become,
I knew he couldn't love me,
I knew I shouldn't love him,
I let my heart fall real hard,
Now I fear I'll never feel again,
I hope for strength to ignore the pain,
To forget he was ever in my life,
I can't believe I'm this tore up,
I hate myself,
Even while I still love him,
And I think I will love him still,
When I finally get to die.
-Ashleigh Renee Garner-

I NEVER


[_] I NEVER HAVE BEEN DRUNK(Well, not REALLY)
[X] I NEVER HAVE SMOKED POT
[_] I NEVER HAVE KISSED A MEMBER OF THE OPPOSITE SEX
[_]I NEVER HAVE KISSED A MEMBER OF THE SAME SEX
[X] I NEVER CRASHED A FRIEND'S CAR
[X] I NEVER BEEN TO JAPAN
[X] I NEVER RODE IN A TAXI
[X] I NEVER HAD ANAL SEX
[_] I NEVER HAVE BEEN IN LOVE
[_] I NEVER HAD SEX
[X] I NEVER HAVE HAD SEX IN PUBLIC
[_] I NEVER HAVE BEEN DUMPED
[X] I NEVER SHOPLIFTED
[_] I NEVER BEEN IN A FIST FIGHT
[X] I NEVER HAD A THREESOME
[_] I NEVER BEEN SNUCK OUT OF MY PARENT'S HOUSE
[X] I NEVER BEEN TIED UP (SEXUALLY)(not yet)
[X] I NEVER HAD SEX WITH A MEMBER OF THE SAME SEX
[X] I NEVER BEEN ARRESTED
[_] I NEVER MADE OUT WITH A STRANGER
[X] I NEVER WENT ON A BLIND DATE
[_] I NEVER LIED TO A FRIEND
[_] I NEVER HAD A CRUSH ON A TEACHER
[_] I NEVER SKIPPED SCHOOL
[X] I NEVER SLEPT WITH A CO-WORKER
[X] I NEVER BEEN SKYDIVING
[X] I NEVER HAVE BEEN DUMPSTER DIVING
[_] I NEVER PUT MY PANTS ON MY HEAD RANDOMLY
[_] I NEVER WALKED IN ON FRIENDS HAVING SEX (pokes out minds eye)
[X] I NEVER WALKED IN ON MY PARENTS HAVING SEX
[_] I NEVER HEARD MY PARENTS HAVING SEX
[_] I NEVER HAVE BEEN CAUGHT HAVING SEX (oral with obie, leave it to John, Jake, Chris, Chris, and Andy)
[_] I NEVER LIED JUST TO COVER MY OWN ASS
[_] I NEVER CUT SOMEONE AND MADE THEM BLEED
[X] I NEVER TOLD SOMEONE I LOVED THEM JUST TO MAKE ME OR THEM FEEL BETTER
[X] I NEVER ATE A LIVE GOLDFISH


THREE THINGS THAT SCARE ME
01 - Commitment
02 – Love
03 - Spiders
THREE THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND
01 - Love
02 - Death
03 – Life
THREE THINGS I'D LIKE TO LEARN
01 – How to play guitar
02 - How to show love
03 - How to let people into my life
THREE THINGS I AM WEARING RIGHT NOW
01 - Jean Shorts
02 – Bandana swim top and plaid tank top
03 - Red Cowgirl Up hat
THREE THINGS ON MY DESK
01 - Truck keys
02 - Ashtray
03 - Catfood and its bowl dispenser thingy
THREE THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE
01 – Graduate highschool
02 – Move in with Obie
03 – Go see Nick up in Canada (*hugs him*)
THREE WAYS TO DESCRIBE MY PERSONALITY
01 - Obnoxious but quiet
02 - Angry and depressed
03 – Distant
THREE BAD THINGS ABOUT MY PERSONALITY
01 – Tend to be violent, both verbally and physically
02 – Concentrated anger
03 – Numbness
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE
01 - Native American
02 - Irish
03 - German
THREE THINGS I LIKE ABOUT MY BODY
01 – Eyes
02 - Lips
03 - feet (their tiny, it's cute kinda)
THREE THINGS I DON'T LIKE ABOUT MY BODY
01 – My NOSE
02 – My thighs
03 - My uneven boobs. the right ones like almost a whole cup size bigger than the left now!
THREE THINGS MOST PEOPLE DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU
01 – I'm more lesbian than straight
02 – I used to sing Destiny (my cat) to sleep when she was a kitten *blush*
03 – I'm not as sure of myself as I try to make myself out to be. 
THREE THINGS I SAY THE MOST
01 – "I don't care"
02 – "I Love You!" -to obie, nick, jake, kitty, kim, erica... ect.
03 – "uh" and "um" *smart ass* *smiles*
THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO
01 - Ontario, Canada
02 – Cancun, Mexico
03 – Home to be in Obies strong loving arms. Are we there yet, baby? *pout*
THREE NAMES THAT YOU GO BY
01 - Ashleigh
02 - Renee
03 - Ashie-nay


Smoke
Natalie Imbruglia
Left of the Middle

My Lullaby, hung out to dry
What's up with that
It's over
Where are you dad
Mum's lookin' sad
What's up with that
It's dark in here

Why, bleeding is breathing
You're hiding underneath the smoke in the room
Try, bleeding is believing
I used to

My mouth is dry
Forgot how to cry
What's up with that
You're hurting me
I'm running fast
Can't hide the past
What's up with that
You're pushing me

Why, bleeding is breathing
You're hiding underneath the smoke in the room
Try, bleeding is believing
I used to
I used to

Why, bleeding is breathing
You're hiding underneath the smoke in the room
Try, bleeding is believing
I saw you crawling on the floor
Why, bleeding is breathing
You're hiding underneath the smoke in the room
Try, bleeding is believing
I saw you crawling on the floor
Why, bleeding is breathing
You're hiding underneath the smoke in the room
Try, bleeding is believing
I saw you crawling on the floor




hey nick, want to play pool? lol




. . .


moi

. . .














R.I.P. Jonathan Walter Hooker (Sept. 2, 1988 - Nov. 21, 2004)