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BeautifulDecay (Find me on Facebook- Cj Kulhawy)

Member #133544 created: 2005-04-29 06:46:40Simple URL:   

Name: CeeJay



This is something that I am very proud of drawing... tell me what you think of it

Elftown titles and orders
Street childAdventurerTravelling bard

Index-pages in the wiki: (help)

Im a lesbian if you dont like it then dont message me or anything.
I am a nut case as some of my friends have told me.
I love Shakespear and Edger Allen Poe, they rule.
I love anything from the olden times such as Medieval times or during the Shakespearian era.
If I was in those times I would be a Knight or a Bard.
But I would not wear the dresses. I find that I was born in the wrong era because of how I am. But yes enough about that go read that rest of my house. Fare thee well. *Bows*

"I dont want to be everything to everyone. I just want to be something to someone."
I would love if that happened to me

I am all alone
With no love to be shown
I am not there I do not sleep
Alone in one awful heap
I’ve been searching through the years
Trying to find all of your fears
My heart and blood have gone cold
Not having you to hold
I am all alone 

This Valentines Morning
I will never die
But I wither silently inside
Not having you here
To wipe away my tears
Your voice as soft as a dove’s
You the only one I love
I silently mourn
From the heart you have torn

A picture with a twist
I want to paint a picture,
A picture with a twist,
I'll paint it with a sharpened knife,
Right across my wrist.
And from my wretched body,
The bloody reds will flow,
Along with it pain and hurt,
I guess you'll never know.
And then the blues are formed,
From the flood of tears I cry,
And the painted pastel mass,
Is a record of my crimes?
So now I’ve painted my picture,
The one that had a twist,
I used a sharpened knife,
Slashed twice across each wrist.
And now the blood flows freely,
As you know it would,
I only did this cause,
You never understood.

My Sweet Beloved
I fell so hard matching
Scars to memory's gone by
You held no affinity for me
Why show me that you loved me
Why did you wait till you clenched
My soul so tightly in you possession
Just to kill me for your thrill
Your cruel deep eyes
Stole my life away
With your hands grasping my
Face forever screaming
As you watch my tears silently
Cascade down my face
As I fade to death I
Ask you my sweet beloved
Why like this

I am too lost to be saved
I am too lost to be found
In my darkness others are lost
They can’t find their way out
I am losing the battle between
Good and evil
Being here in this world has
Left me weak and lonely
Letting the pain take over
So I can feel something
Letting the blood slowly flow
From my wrists onto
The cold tile floor
Dropping the razor to the
Blood covered tile
Passing into the
Darkness that is me
And waking to a blinding light
Only to have the darkness
Tearing me back again

My Angel
I can’t wait for day light to dim
For the darkness to take us in
So I can die alone in the dead of night
But I look up and see you running towards me
I lean my head back against the tombstone
Looking up at the moon as the sky pours down on me
You fall on your knees beside me
I look over at you water dripping down my face
Washing away the tears as they fall
I see a look of pain on your face
As you kneel their trying to get me to move
I look into your hazel eyes and
Whisper "I did this for you and I Love you"
I look down at the gashes going up my arm
I look on as the blood takes my life away
I look back up at you wanting your face to be
The last thing that I see
I lean forward and place a soft kiss on your lips
Then I pull away and lean my head back
Looking up at the moon as I slowly die with you beside me
I whisper one last thing
"I did this so you could live happily with her
I Love you and goodbye my angel"

Age: 22Year of birth: 1989Month of birth: 3Day of birth: 10

Gender: female

Fantasy race personality: Elf
Elftownworldmap 54°3.882'N 119°56.406'W

Place of living: Canada - Alberta

Town: Whitecourt

Known languages

Elfwood artist: No

Elfwood writer: No

Elftown crew wannabe: Yes

Favorite drawing objects

Computer interests

grungeheavy metalhip hop
new ageoperapop
progressive metalpunkrock

Other interests
bookscatschasing the preferred sex
chesscookingcrime stories
poetrypornrole playing

Civil status: married

Sexual preference: same sex

Body shape: normal

Height: 164

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