Juggalette Pledge
Juggalo Pledge
I pledge allegiance to the Hatchet of the Underground Juggalo Society, and to the Ninjas for which it stands, One Family, Under Clowns, Full of Freaks, with Faygo and Magik Neden for all!!!
[Put this up in your house if you're a juggalo/juggalette!!]


LAYER ONE:
-- Name: Victoria
-- Nickname: Tory
-- Birth date: July 26,1985
-- Birthplace: Galveston,Tx
-- Current location:HELL!!!!
-- Eye color: green
-- Hair color: multi-tonal color (naturally black)
-- Height:5'6"
-- IQ: genius
-- Righty or lefty: Righty
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LAYER TWO
-- Your heritage: Irish ,scotish,german,and cherokee
-- The shoes you wore today: shoes
-- Your weakness: my kid
-- Your fears: i have no fears
-- Your perfect pizza: pineapple and canadian bacon pizza
-- Goal you'd like to achieve: get a high paying job as a lead singer or drummer of a rock band bitches!!!!
--Your favorite bands:Ozzy, Black Sabbath, Slipknot, ICP, Korn, Metallica, AC/DC, As I Lay Dying, My Chemical Romance........ and the list goes on............
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LAYER THREE
-- Your most overused phrase: SHUT UP!!!
-- Your thoughts first waking up:GOTTA PEE!!!
-- Your best physical feature:eyes
-- Your in-bed time: when i get tired
-- Your most missed memory: my grandpa
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LAYER FOUR
-- Soda:cherry cola
-- Fast food joint: double dave's pizza works
-- Single or group dates: both
-- Adidas or Nike: nike
-- Chocolate or vanilla: swirl
-- Cappuccino or coffee: it's all coffee to me ^_^
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LAYER FIVE
-- Smoke: Not anymore
-- Cuss: hell yeah
-- Take a shower every day: just about
-- Have a crush(es): none at this time
-- Do you think you've been in love:no comment
-- Want to go to college:been there done that, got the t-shirt
-- Want to get married: not again
-- Believe in yourself: yep
-- Get motion sickness: hell no
-- Think you're attractive: no not really
-- Think you're a health freak: not really
-- Get along with your parents: nope not at all
-- Like thunderstorms: when they don't produce tornadoes.......
-- Play an instrument: drums, piano, tambourine
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LAYER SEVEN
Ever...
-- Played a game that required removal of clothing: mebe >_>........ <_< who wants to know?
-- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated:no, i can hold my liquor thank you!
-- Been caught doing something: mebe.......
-- Been called a tease: all the time.
-- Gotten beaten up: no i'm normally the one giving the whoopin
-- Shoplifted: a couple of times
-- Changed who you were to fit in: hell no!!!
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LAYER EIGHT
-- Age you hope to be married: never again
-- Numbers and names of children: 1, Connor Aidan Christ
-- How do you want to die: in my sleep
-- Where do you want to go to college: no where university
-- What do you want to be when you grow up: rich and famous
-- What country would you most like to visit: Ireland and Scotland
-- Who is your most loved person: my son
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LAYER NINE
In a boy
-- Best eye color: amber
-- Best hair color:reddish brown
-- Short or long hair: short
-- Height: 6'2
-- Best weight: any
-- Best articles of clothing: clothes
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LAYER TEN
-- Number of drugs taken illegally: enough
-- Number of people I could trust with my life: 0
-- Number of CDs that I own: 30 +
-- Number of piercings: 1 in my upper right ear, my lower lobes, and my lip and soon my tongue will be pierced along with my eyebrow
-- Number of tattoos: 1
-- Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: 10 (don't ask why)
-- Number of scars on my body: too many to count
-- Big injuries: not really
-- Number of bones broken: 0
-- Number of things in my past that I regret: none
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Most simply put, punk is a state of mind. Forget the wirst bands, trendy vintage tees, all star converses and trucker hats, and "moshing" at concerts. Punk is individualism and freedom from caring about what other people think. What we're seeing is punk's cousin... pop punk. If it's mainstream, if it's predictable, if it's trendy, it's not true punk. Punk is not dead, it's just really rare these days

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OLD MEN;GOTTA LOV'EM!!!
I was at the mall the other day eating at the food court.
I noticed an old man watching a teenager sitting next to him.
The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange and blue.
The old man kept staring at him.
The teenager would look and find the old man staring every time.
When the teenager had enough he sarcastically asked
"What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?"
The old man did not bat an eye in his response,
"Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock.
I was just wondering if you were my son."

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The Preacher and The Donkey:

The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. 
The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he
entered it in the race again, and it won again.

The local paper read: ......
PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he
ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race. 

The next day, the local paper headline read:
BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ASS.

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the pastor to
get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in
a nearby convent.

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following
headline the next day:
NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.

The Bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have
to get rid of the donkey, so she sold i t to a farmer for $10. 

The next day the paper read:
NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10. 

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to
buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run
wild. 

The next day the headlines read:
NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE. 

Alas, the Bishop was buried the next day.

MORAL OF THE STORY?
Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much
grief and misery and even shorten your life. 
So, be yourself and enjoy life
... stop worrying about everyone else's ass and you'll live longer
and be a lot happier!

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        Have You Ever.......

(x) smoked a cigarette
(x) Second hand smoked
(x) crashed a friend's car
(x) stolen a car..
(x) been in love
(x) been dumped
(x) shoplifted
(x) kissed someone
(x) been kissed
(x) been in a fist fight
(x) snuck out of your parent's house
(x) had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
(x) been arrested
(x) gone on a blind date
( ) lied to a friend
(x) skipped a class/ school
(x) seen someone die
(x) had a crush on one of your internet friends
( ) been to Canada
(x) been to Mexico
( ) been on a plane
(x)purposely set a part of yourself on fire
(x) eaten Sushi
( ) been skiing
(x) met someone in person from the internet
(x) been moshing at a concert
(x) taken painkillers
(x) love someone or miss someone right now
(x) laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
(x) made a snow angel
(x) had a tea party
(x) flown a kite
(x) built a sand castle
(x) gone puddle jumping
(x) played dress up
(x) jumped into a pile of leaves
( ) gone sledding
(x) cheated while playing a game
(x) been lonely
(x) fallen asleep at work/school
(x) used a fake id
(x) watched the sun set
( ) felt an earth quake
(x) touched a snake
(x) slept beneath the stars
(x) been tickled
(x) been robbed
(x) been misunderstood
(x) pet a reindeer/goat
(x) won a contest
(x) run a red light
( ) been suspended from school
(x) been in a car
( ) had braces
(x) eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night
(x) had deja vu
(x) danced in the moonlight
(x) liked the way you look
(x) witnessed a crime
(x) questioned your heart
(x) been obesseed with post it notes
(x) squished barefoot through the mud
(x) been lost
(x) been to the opposite side of the country
(x) swam in the ocean
(x) cried yourself to sleep
(x) played cops and robbers
(x) recently colored with crayons
(x) sung karaoke
(x) paid for a meal with only coins
(x) done something you told yourself you wouldn't
(x) made prank phone calls
(x) laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(x) caught a snowflake on your tongue
(x) danced in the rain
(x) written a letter to Santa Claus
(x) been kissed under a mistletoe
(x) watched the sun rise with someone you care about
(x) blown bubbles
(x) made a bonfire on the beach
(x) crashed a party
(x) gone rollerskating
(x) had a wish come true
(x) worn pearls
(x) jumped off a bridge
(x) ate dog/cat food
(x) told a complete stranger you loved them
(x) kissed a mirror
(x) sang in the shower
(x) had a dream that you married someone
(x) glued your hand to something
(x) got your tongue stuck to a flag pole
(x) kissed a fish
(x) sat on a roof top
(x) screamed at the top of your lungs
(x) done a one-handed cartwheel
(x) talked on the phone for more than 6 hours
(x) stayed up all night
(x) didn't take a shower for a week
(x) pick and ate an apple right off the tree
(x) climbed a tree
(x) had a tree house
(x) are scared to watch scary movies alone
(x) believe in ghosts
(x) believe in angels
(x) have more then 30 pairs of shoes
(x) worn a really ugly outfit to school just to see what others say
(x) gone streaking
(x) gone doorbell ditching
(x) played chicken
(x) been pushed into a pool/hot tub with all your clothes on
(x) been told you're hot by a complete stranger
( ) broken a bone
(x) been easilly amused
(x) caught a fish then ate it after it was cooked
(x) caught a butterfly
(x) laughed so hard you cried
(x) cried so hard you laughed
(x) cheated on a test
(x) have/had a Britney Spears CD
(x) forgotten someones name(whenever i need to tell somebody somebodys name i forget it)
(x) French braided someones hair
(x) gone skinny dipping in a lake
(x) been threatened to be kicked out of your house
(x) been kicked out your house
(x) thought you'd never be happy again

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Why We Love Children!:

1) NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

2) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

3) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

5) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?"

"Yes," I answered and continued writing the report.

"My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?"

"Yes, that's right," I told her.

"Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you please tie my shoe?"

6) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked.

"It sure is," I replied.

Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"

7) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

8) DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."

"And why not, darling?"

"You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning. "

9) DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes."

10) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

11) BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages.

"Mama, look what I found," the boy called out.

"What have you got there, dear?"

With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"


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LEO:. The Lion in bed

Great talker. Sexy and passionate. Laid back. Knows how to have fun. Is really good at. Great kisser. Unpredictable. Outgoing. Down to earth. Addictive. Attractive. Loud. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Not one to mess with. Rare to find. Good when found.