Wiki:
Page name: Prose contest - fairy tales opening [Exported view] [RSS]
2006-01-02 18:53:15
Last author: shotokan_gal
Owner: shotokan_gal
# of watchers: 5
Fans: 0
D20: 12
Bookmark and Share
<img:stuff/elftownprosecontest.jpg>


<img:stuff/2237_wiki_help_9y7vcgcflr5.jpg>


Elftown Prose Contest - Fairy tales


Opening Paragraph


Credit to [Melocrie] for the writing.


<img:stuff/2237_wiki_help_9y7vcgcflr5.jpg>



Once upon a time, there was a beautiful, gorgeous land, still in the age of castles and princesses. There, the days went by like in any other: The sun rising and setting, and meanwhile, many things happened, many adventurous things. But none was so exceptional as that one day, on which the sun was rising into a rather misty morning. It seemed quite plain as any other, but for one thing. A bird sat on the edge of a cliff, watching over the valley. On the other side, lay a castle, quite hidden in the damp air of mist. But a light shone over it, and the bird too might have noticed, that something was about to happen.
In an old farm house, far away from the misty land, lived a little boy and girl. As brother and sister, they of course had times to argue, but also to play. They lived there together with their aunt and uncle, for their parents had died when they were still far younger. Every day passed as another. Until that one fateful day when the old bell on the door rang. The boy hurried to open it, but there was a sight which he had never seen before. In front of him, on the doorstep under the pouring rain, stood a little, pointy-hatted dwarf.



<img:stuff/2237_wiki_help_9y7vcgcflr5.jpg>


Go or return to:
- Elftown Prose Contest
- Prose contest - Fairy tales

Username (or number or email):

Password:

2006-01-11 [lolbriena]: The begginging description is good, but the second paragraph needs work!

2006-01-11 [shotokan_gal]: Needs work in what way? It won't be changed now however, we already have entries.

2006-01-18 [Mikhul, the Bard]: I have chosen to use the first opening paragraph. Is it ok if I sort of tweak it a bit? I feel that some of the words should be omitted, and the language simplified into something easily digested by a reader who might not understand certain words. It does say that the story should be easily read by children. lol!

2006-01-19 [Melocrie]: Hmmm I don't know, what do you think [shotokan_gal]?

2006-01-19 [shotokan_gal]: I'd personally keep it the same, after all, you wont be marked on it :/ The problem is we don't want people to try and use it to try and extend their word limit past what allowed (since the opening paragraph isn't counted there).

2006-01-19 [Mikhul, the Bard]: I see I see. Well, I already have the story up. The Enchanted Castle, I only tweaked the opening only slightly. Could you please take a look at it, [shotokan_gal] and see if its ok. I don't want any marks against me. lol!

2006-01-20 [Melocrie]: I am terribly sorry, but I'm afraid I personally don't agree with it. You see, the way you changed it gives it turn in our idea. Furthermore, any little detail can change things, and your story is now just a little too different from the others, therefor harder to compare and judge.

2006-01-20 [Melocrie]: (sorry if I haven't made myself clear, I'm not English myself see, and I just woke up O.o)

2006-01-20 [shotokan_gal]: Well you completely changed the second part after the castle description to be about different characters :/ the story was meant to include everything on this page. Perhaps we need to make that clearer somewhere?

2006-01-20 [Melocrie]: Well, it seems to be like it's clear enough, but sure if some people don't get it...

2006-01-20 [Mikhul, the Bard]: Um...I still am not getting it. It seemed to me, that after the introduction, we could take the story anywhere, save for the rules which did not say anything about not doing what I did. It said to keep the intrpduction as close to the original as possible, which is what I thought I did. Would it be better if I keep the original introduction, and keep the rest of the story, or is my story just to...different? I actually love to write, and I can get a little carried away in the whole Epic-ness, and such...and honestly, it seemed like the introductions were written by someone who did not originally speak English. You see, the writing is sort of hard to digest...well, for me.

2006-01-20 [Mikhul, the Bard]: It's sort of very hard to follow...which doesnt mean it isnt good -- its actually very good. But like I said...its very hard to follow, and understand because of the arrangements of the words, and such.

2006-01-21 [shotokan_gal]: The rest of the story is indeed free to do what you want with, but you haven't included the whole introduction in your story (which introduces some characters).

2006-01-21 [shotokan_gal]: And the rules don't actually say 'keep as close to the original as possible' they say - use this opening in your story. We hoped that was clear enough, though I may change the wording now if I think of anything clearer.

2006-01-21 [Mikhul, the Bard]: um...I think this is all a misunderstanding. The whole this is ONE introduction...? I thought the two paragraphs were two seperate introductions that we could pick from... so I chose the first, thinking that the other half wasnt a part of the story. Now I just feel like poo XD

2006-01-21 [Mikhul, the Bard]: I shall fix my story, and let you know when its done.

2006-01-21 [Mikhul, the Bard]: I'm pretty sure I can keep the same story line, and just tweak ti lightly to include the omitted information.

2006-02-20 [SpookShow Babe]: I was wondering if we could make it so that there were 3 dwarves not just one. Is that ok?

2006-02-20 [shotokan_gal]: You can add more characters if you like yes. In the lines which come after the opening here. But as this contest closes in roughly a minute, you'll have to be fast :P

2006-02-21 [SpookShow Babe]: Example being: In front of him, on the doorstep under the pouring rain, stood three little, pointy-hatted dwarves.

2006-02-21 [SpookShow Babe]: lol nvm

Number of comments: 47
Older comments: (Last 200) 2 1 .0.

Show these comments on your site

Elftown - Wiki, forums, community and friendship.