Bears

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Page name: Bears [Logged in view] [RSS]

2009-12-26 09:10:29

Last author: Hedda
Owner: NOOOPE

# of watchers: 18

D20: 2

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"Bears kicks ass! By GOD. By GOD." - A young man of good intentions

Lately I have noticed something in regards to the world and it's state of being etc etc. BEARS. Yes. With a B, a B, a B-E-A-R-S. Bears. Frankly, my brothers in science, it can not be denied. There are bears, and they are here, on this planet, and they eat radiation. YES.

Let's say, well, let's say you were to meet a bear. What is it you would do besides die?

-Scream
-Weep
-Soil your pants

Spot on. BEARS. I say it again for drama's sake. Oh, what the drama. But listen here, my soul sisters! Could there be an alternative? TO BEAR DEATH? Dying... from Bears? Is there some vaccine you can take in case of a bear outbreak?

Yes and no. But mostly no. When facing a bear the best things to do are:

-Shoot yourself
-Hurl yourself off a cliff
-Smash your head in
-Overdose

This way the bear wont kill you. You will already be dead. Trust me, it is better that way.

EXTRA EXTRA! HEAR ALL ABOUT IT! ALEXANDER HAMILTON CHALLANGED A BEAR TO A DUEL, AND DIED

Literally, the word Bear means "Not a dog, a cat or anything not a bear". This must be taken into consideration.

Bears cannot be avoided. They hide around corners and wait.

"There was this time my aunt died. It was a'cause of Bears," - Someone you know.

You have no hope. A bear will kill you. Live each moment prepared for death.

2007-01-29 [Doormat]: One time I saw a bear. It didn't kill me. Does it mean it gave me radiation poisoning?

2007-01-29 [Dil*]: Same....actually...

2007-01-29 [Fizban]: really!! I have so totally not even seen a bear at all.

2007-01-29 [Dil*]: it freaked me out..it was just across the street...10 meters away from me...I gawked at it stupidly, then a bus drove down the road (in front of the bear), and I took that as my opportunity to walk fast down the hill...don't look back..just walk fast fucking away...

2007-01-29 [Fizban]: LOL!!!!!

'tis amusing.

2007-01-29 [NOOOPE]: A bear shit in my granny's yard. And uh, that's as close to a bear encounter I've ever had.

2007-01-29 [Fizban]: AHHH!! HAH!! Radioactive bear shit...woo!

2007-02-01 [toycar]: We have koala bears here?...Plenty smaller, but they have a nasty growl which can only mean one thing.... impending doom. Clearly.

2007-02-01 [Fizban]: BUT, THERE, SO, CUTE!!

2007-02-01 [NOOOPE]: I thought koala bears weren't actually bears...

2007-02-01 [Fizban]: they aren't, bears are mammals and Koala bears are marsupials. It's an instance of where things evolve to resemble one another, but have no real genetic relationship.

2007-02-02 [kay-chan]: Yay for convergent evolution! :D

2007-02-02 [NOOOPE]: Like sea monkeys... (pssst *in horse Homer voice* They're not real monkeys)

2007-02-02 [kay-chan]: O____O Well gee, thanks... WHY DON'T YOU JUST TAKE AWAY MY BIRTHDAY?!

2007-02-02 [NOOOPE]: *Gets the tongs*

2007-02-02 [Fizban]: ooh, I want it I want it!! I want to have two birthdays! >:)~

2007-02-02 [kay-chan]: ...NEVAR! *runs off into da sunset*

2007-02-03 [Doormat]: "Typo typo!" cried the grammar nazi, firing up his oven.

Bears cannot be avoided. They hide around corners and wait.

2007-02-03 [kay-chan]: Not a typo. The y used to be there...

UNTIL THE BEARS GOT IT.

2007-02-03 [NOOOPE]: WOORT! I just rented a new y from the letter factory.

2007-02-03 [Dil*]: lmao!!

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