i have longe blonde hair,im 5"4 i have blue eyes, and im tann, im also orieo.

~BlOnD jOkEs

Two blondes living in Texas were sitting on a bench talking and one blonde says to the other, "What do you think is farther, Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooooooooooooo.... can you see Florida?" 
 
(How can you tell which blonde is the waitress?
She is the one with the tampon behind her ear, wondering what she did with her pencil.)


(Why did the blonde quit her job as a restroom attendant?
She couldn't figure out how to refill the hand dryer.)

(How can you tell if a blonde has been using your lawnmower?
The green WELCOME mat is ripped all to shreds.)

(Three blondes are sitting on a park bench eating ice cream cones. One is sucking hers, one is biting hers, one is licking hers. Which one is married?
The one with the wedding ring, YOU SICK-O!)

(What's the advantage of being married to a blonde?
You can park in handicapped zones.)

(How can you tell which tricycle belongs to the blonde?
It is the one with the kickstand.)

(Why did it take the blonde a whole week to wash three basement windows?
It took her six days just to dig the holes to put the ladder in.)

(Did you hear about the blonde who gave her cat a bath?
She still hasn't gotten all the hair off her tongue.)

(Did you hear about the blonde who thought she discovered that she had a twin sister?
She didn't realize she was looking in a mirror.)

(Did you hear about the blonde who never learned to waterski?
She couldn't find a lake with a slope.)

(Why did the blonde only smell good on the right side?
She didn't know where to buy Left Guard!)

(Why couldn't the blonde bob for apples?
Her sister was using the toilet.)

(How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
Tell her a joke on Wednesday.)

(Me: Hey, Donna, how do you make a blonde laugh twice in a row?
Donna: I dunno. How?
Me: Tell her the same dumb blonde joke twice in a row.
Me: Hey Donna, how do you make a blonde laugh twice in a row?)

(Why did the blonde put her finger over the nail she was hammering?
The noise gave her a headache.)

(Why don't blondes have elevator jobs?
They don't know the route.)

(What did the blonde do when she noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency?
She turned it over and used the other side.)

(Did you hear about the blonde who just bought an A.M. radio?
It took her two weeks to figure out that you could play it at night.)

(Did you hear about the blonde who couldn't wait to see 20,000 leagues under the sea?
She said that she loved baseball, and was surprised that there were so many teams.)

(Why did the blonde stand in front of mirror with her eyes closed?
She wanted to see what he looked like asleep.)

(How many blondes does it take to make a circuit?
Two: one to stand in the bathtub, and another to pass her the blow dryer!)

(What does a postcard from a blonde's vacation say?
Having a wonderful time. Where am I?)

(Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?
Toes go in first.)

(Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet?
So she wouldn't wake up the sleeping pills.)

(Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished the jigsaw puzzle in only six months?
Because on the box, it said "From 2-4 years.")

(Did you here about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air?
She missed.)

(What's the difference between a blonde and a tree?
The tree knows when it's being cut down.)


(What's a blonde's favorite color?
A light shade of clear.)

(What do blondes and cow-pats have in common?
They both get easier to pick-up with age.)

(Did you hear about the blonde prisoner who was found in her cell with half a dozen bumps on her head?
She tried to hang herself with a bungee cord.)

(Hear about the blonde explorer?
She bought a piece of sandpaper thinking it was a map of the Sahara Desert.)


(Blonde: I was born in the U.S.
Friend: Oh really, what part?
Blonde: All of me, silly.)


(What do a group of blondes have in common?
Nothing they can think of.)

(A blonde's house is on fire when she pulled up to her residence in the country. From her cell phone, she calls the fire department in a panic. The dispatcher tells her to settle down; they need to know how to get to her house. The blonde replies, "Duh, in your big red fire truck.")

(How do you confuse a blonde?
Put her in a round room and tell her to piss in the corner)


This Will Make You Cry...


Jenny was so happy about the house they had found.


For once in her life it was on the right side of
town.


She unpacked her things with such great ease.


As she watched her new curtains blow in the breeze.


How wonderful it was to have her own room.


School would be starting; she'd have friends over
soon.


There'd be sleep-overs, and parties; she was so happy


It's just the way she wanted her life to be.


On the first day of school, everything went great.


She made new friends and even got a date!


She thought, "I want to be popular and I'm going to be,


Because I just got a date with the star of the team!"


To be known in this school you had to have a clout,


And dating this guy would sure help her out.


There was only one proble! m stoppin g her fate.


Her parents had said she was too young to date.
"Well, I just won't tell them the entire truth.


They won't know the difference; what's there to lose?"


Jenny asked to stay with her friends that night.


Her parents frowned but said, "All right."


Excited, she got ready for the big event


But as she rushed around like she had no sense,


She began to feel guilty about all the lies,


But what's a pizza, a party, and a moonlight ride?


Well the pizza was good, and the party was great,
But the moonlight ride would have to wait.


For Jeff was half drunk by this time.


She felt someone remove her from the twisted rubble,


And heard, call an ambulance!
These kids are in trouble!


Voices she heard...a few words at best.
But she knew there were two cars involved in the wreck.


Then wondered to herself if Jeff was all right,


And if the people in the other car was alive.


She awoke in the hospital to faces so sad.


"You've been in a wreck and it looks pretty bad."


These voices echoed inside her head,


As they gently told her that Jeff was
dead.


They said "Jenny, we've done all we can
do.


But it looks as if we'll lose you too."


"But the people in the other car!? "Jenny
cried.


"We're sorry, Jenny, they also died."


Jenny prayed, "God, forgive me for what I've done


I only wanted to have just one night of
fun."


"Tell those people's family, I've made
their lives dim,


And wish I could return their families
to them."


"Tell Mom and Dad I'm sorry I lied,


And that it's my fault so many have died.


Oh, nurse, won't you please tell them
that for me?"


The nurse just stood there-she never
agreed.


But took Jenny's hand with tears in her
eyes.


And a few moments later Jenny died.
A man asked the nurse,
"Why didn't you do your best?"


To bid that girl her one last request?"


She looked at the man with eyes so sad.


"Because the people in the other car were > her mom and dad."



This story is sad and unpleasant but true,


So young people take heed, it could have
been you.


READ AND PASS ON
TO AT LEAST 10 PEOPLE


Please listen to
this angel's request......


If you do the small favor she asks to
come true,


She will be sent down to guard
and protect you.


Please....do it for Jenny.
Send ten copies and see what
happens in four days.
You will
get a surprise.


This is true, even if you are
not superstitious.


your true love will realize they like you. Something good will happen to you at approx. 1:42pm tomorrow, it could be anywhere. So get ready for the biggest shock of your life. If you break this chain, you will be cursed with relationship problems for the most important time of your life. Send this to 15 people in 15 minutes to carry on the chain..and spare yourself the emotional stress

im sittin gettin a buzz try toget love from the homie dady had to leav sothen he wants to he said he gona be one day he want to be shorty gona be a thug.
done by [90leigh]