This is my fucking tattoo!! I love it... its a peice of fucking work! Worship it! XD
I AM: Tena
I HAVE: a lame life
I WISH: i had my ideal of a perfect man!!!!
I HATE: my mother
I MISS: being optimistic and happy
I FEAR: being rediculed
I HEAR: not sure lol
I SEARCH: for hapiness, though never find it
I WONDER: why people do the things they do
I REGRET: a lot of things
I LOVE: my friends and family...
I ALWAYS: blame myself
I AM NOT: who i wished to me... but i am myself
I CRY: little emo tears
I WRITE: about my life
My name is Tena. I am from Marshallown, Iowa. I like to watch movies, listen to music, hang out with friends, party, work and just have hella fun. My favorite person in the world is my dad!!! I believe that the most important thing in life is to just be yourself and have fun; never forget who u are!!!! I also believe everything happens for a reason and if someone does something bad to you its cuz you did something bad to someone else. If someTHING bad happenes to you its cuz you just did something you shouldn't have. Works the same if you do something good.
my [
fan club]!!!
go here for some [
photographs]
Tena's Photographs
heres my other [
wiki page]
Tena's wiki page for wiki's
I hate my life
I want to die
I walk through the rain
So no one knows i cry
Why do you judge me?
Why don't you care?
All I do is cry
You just sit there and stare
I want to do it
So bad you don't know
To end my life
Just let it all go
As you're out with all your friends
I sit here writing this
Razorblade in one hand
Wanting to slit my wrist.
I won't say good-bye
Not to you or anyone
Maybe then you'll realize
What you have done.
ˆˆthat is a poem i wrote a while agoˆˆ
the next 2 were written 12/27/05
'Til The End
I can't stop crying
you hurt me so bad
why did you do this
wish you could take it back
What did i do wrong?
was it something i said?
i need to lie down
lay in my bed
Think about nothing
trying nott o think of it
you put my through this
all of this shit
You told me you loved me
but you didn't want to be friends
I am so hurt now
it will hurt 'til the end
I Was Wrong
I can't believe you
I thought you were my mom
We're supposed to be friends
I guess I was wrong
You told me you loved me
But you wouldn't call me
Not even on Christmas
Never at all
Whenever I see you
You seem like your glad
But then when you never call
It makes me so mad
It seems like you don't even
want to be a part of my life
It hurts me so much
Why did you put me through all this strife?
We've never been the same
Not since you left home
You made me feel so sad
Made me feel all alone
I guess we'll never have
The relationship we once had
I'll stay at home
Stay with Dad
written 1/6/06
The Dream
I see you there
Looking at me
A gun to your head
You're on your knees
You say good-bye
And pull the trigger
Brains splatter
The pool of blood gets bigger
I begin to cry
A devestating scream
Then i wake up
It was all a dream
[New Poems]
(no title yet)
This pain builds up inside of me
I'm ready to let go
I'm lost in my lonliness
so much you'll never know
I write a story
I write it on my wrist
one thats morbid and painful
one with a twist
I'm bleeding my story out
the story of pain inside
but the story just isn't enough
it won't let my feelings subside
I feel empty
I feel lost
in my feelings
in my thoughts
you try to help
you just make it worse
its only happiness that i thurst
all thats left of my heart
is a little speck, like dust
this world is falling apart
loosing all sense of trust
there seems to be little love
left in this evil place
hate taking over
with anger and with haste
Its hard to be patient
will it ever be over?
I Am
I am smart
I am dumb
I am funny
I am dull
I am beautiful
I am ugly
I am normal
I am weird
I am unique
I am creative
I am sweet
I am sensitive
I am tired
I am different
I am bleeding
I am a masachist
I am a bitch
I am nice
I am yearning for affection
I am loving
I am caring
I am sick of caring
I am twisted
I am lonely
I am a person
I am [.ME.]
"It's all fun and games until someone looses and eye.... then hey... a FREE EYEBALL!!!!"
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I I]
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I l I l]
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I lo I lo]
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I lov I lov]
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I love I love]
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I love p I love p]
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I love pi I love pi]
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I love pin I love pin]
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I love pink I love pink]
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I love pin I love pin]
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I love pi I love pi]
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I love p I love p]
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I love I love]
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I lov I lov]
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I lo I lo]
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I l I l]
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I I ]
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FRIENDS!!!!]
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squall_kitty] is the bestest person ever!! He is the only person I can't actually talk to! He has an amazing gift and uses it well!! I love him, like any friend should, and I hope other people can experience his greatness as I have!! In a way he has changed my life and for that I am eternally grateful!! He will never know how much I am thankful for his blessing and warm heart!
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reese_apoc] is fucking awesome and soooo fun ˆ_ˆ.... i heart him lol.... hes the first one in my little mini fan club... he rox!! :P
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Mr. Sunshine] is really awesome! hes so sweet, nice and funny..... if he wasnt gay.... yeah... lol
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Stop Pretending] this girl is cool... shes funny and nice! if you wanta laugh talk to her lol... shes cool
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Kiss Me I'm Emo] is my sister.... shes ok :P... j/k... <3 ya sis ˆ_ˆ
[
Misery Wolf] this guy is awesome.... hes soooo cool... i like him a lot!!!!!!
[
thisfleshatomb] is really awesome... shes a really nice girl and easy to talk to!! I <3 Her!! ˆ_ˆ
[
on.fire] is a really good person and really cool... he just needs a little love....... not to mention hes fun to talk to hah
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the stinger] is my sexy buddy!! hes so hot and i likes him a lot.... and he loves me which is really cool... and hes really sweet and yeah..... i thought id write something about him since he did about me in his diary lol..... yeah..... <3
[
metalmeister] is the shit!! he rox my sox... hes a great person. Take the time to get to know this dude. He's cool!!
DONT FUCK WITH THESE PPL OR I WILL HAUNT YOU.. AND CUT YOU WITH A RUSTY SPOON!!!
have a nice day everyone!! *hugs*
perfect guy: Gerard Way, Johnny Depp, Rob Zombie, Brent Smith!!!
describe ur Perfect Guy:
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Hair Color:] brunette
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Eye Color:] brown
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Height:] taller than me
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Long or Short Hair:] longer, like shoulders, maybe longer
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Glasses or contacts:] contacts but wears glasses once in a while
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Piercings:] any... they are hot!
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Scars: ] dont mind, every scar tells a story
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Buff or Skinny:] in between, not too skinny, not to buff, more..... fit perhaps
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Funny or Serious:] funny definately
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Party or Stay at home:] either/or... maybe have a party at home, XP
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Should he know how to cook:] yes
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Should he have a best friend:] sure!
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Should he have a lot of girl friends:] not really.... as long as they are JUST friends!!!
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Outgoing or Shy:] both
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Sarcastic or Sincere:] both, lol. There are certain times to be either
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Should he watch chick flicks:] if I'm in the mood yeah
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Would he smoke:] his choice
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Would he drink:] yeah sure
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Would he swear:] yeah, lol... everyone does
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Would he play with your hair:] YES!!! OMG! I love that!!
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One or more girls a time:] one
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Bad boy or good boy:] *ahem* both, lol
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Would he kiss you on the first date:] if it went well... he has to make the first move though
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Where would you go to dinner:] wouldnt matter
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Would he bring you flowers:] yes
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Would he lay under the stars with you:] yes! so romantic...
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Would he write poetry about you:] indeed!
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Would he call you baby:] yes
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Would he hang out with your friends:] yes
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Would you hang out with his friends:] yes
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Would he walk you to the door at the end of the date:] yes
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Would he hold your hand:] yep
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Would he play sports:] naw, it wouldn't bug me if he didnt
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Would he sing:] yes
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Would he play an instrument:] yes, guitar, bass, drums, anything we can rock out to! hehe
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Would he keep his room clean:] nope, messy rooms are cute, hehe
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Would he paint, draw or sculpt:] any, but mostly draw
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Would he write his own music:] yes
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Would he use the word "dude":] sure! hehe
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Would he use the word "tight'':] depends what for ;)
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Would he watch the sunrise or sunset with you:] omg yes!! thats my fav!!
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What kind of car would he drive:] something that runs and look decent
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How old would he be:] less than 10 years older and no younger than a year younger than me XD
What would you do if:
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1) I committed suicide:]
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2) I said I liked you:]
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3) I kissed you:]
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4) I lived next door to you:]
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5) I started smoking:]
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6) I stole something:]
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7) I was hospitalized:]
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8) I ran away from home:]
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9) I got into a fight and you weren't there?]
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if u know me tell me, i want to know]